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If you had to do your life over, what would you have done differently? In my particular case, I always had a love of medicine and my biggest regret is not going to medical or veterinary school. I still love medicine but at my age, feel it is far too late to do anything about it. When I was growing up, girls (especially girls from families of extremely limited means) had only three options: becoming a teacher, a nurse, or a secretary. I chose secretary because it required the least amount of training for the lowest cost.
I'm with you--I would have been a good doctor, or a good engineer. Girls didn't go into engineering back then, so I took Sociology in college and ended up typing for a living, until I broke into IT, and in the long run, became an Engineer of a sort after all.
But my biggest regret I think is not having a second child.
Biggest regret: not being smarter; not believing I was smart enough to do bigger things (carryover from what was constantly being told to me and my sisters by our mother)
Second biggest regret: not finding a mentor to replace parental (non) guidance
Third biggest regret: not getting a certain kind of education that would have led to what I really would have preferred to do in life
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
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Oh my... far too many
Probably QUICK, irrational decisions and too active of a tongue.
Retiring at age 49 might be near the top... I should have followed through with Plan A... retire @age 35 (be home with kids, THEN go back to work if necessary, but hopefully NEVER)
1st, in terms of relationship: Marrying husband #1
2nd, in terms of relationship: Having a baby with husband #1
3rd, in terms of relationship: Staying married to #1 for 11 years for the sake of the kid; you can't change an alcoholic.
4th, in terms of relationship: Spoiling the heck out of the kid to make up for divorcing his dad! He turned into a self-centered person who is still immature in his mid-30's.
Professionally: Playing it safe working in corporate America for 30+ years instead of following my passions ..... I would have enjoyed my life a lot more!
I wish I hadn't given away a box of baseball cards when I was ten. There are a few things I should have stuck with just a little bit longer than I did, and a few things I should have dumped a little bit earlier than I did. In some ways I regret an early marriage but on the other hand if I hadn't had that experience I might not have appreciated how good this husband is.
Taking the easy path in too many things: choice of school, choice of spouse, choice of career path. I had no self confidence whatsoever as a young person, and tried to avoid all risk. "I can't do that -- I might fail."
If you had to do your life over, what would you have done differently? In my particular case, I always had a love of medicine and my biggest regret is not going to medical or veterinary school. I still love medicine but at my age, feel it is far too late to do anything about it. When I was growing up, girls (especially girls from families of extremely limited means) had only three options: becoming a teacher, a nurse, or a secretary. I chose secretary because it required the least amount of training for the lowest cost.
What is your deepest regret?
Knowing what I know now, I would do everything the OPPOSITE of what was considered "right." I wouldn't pursue a technical career, wouldn't put my money in housing, wouldn't work my life away and find out now there's no money to take care of my group when we retire--everyone else got theirs first.
We ended up in Bizarro-World, where working hard and being dedicated and doing the most responsible thing was the path to losing the most. Luckily, the most recent generations figured this out already.
Recently had this same discussion with a lifetime friend. He is not real happy with his life and regretting many things he did and did not do so he had a laundry list of stuff.
When asked, I said I am very happy how my life is. I said I consider it a result of the good, the bad, and the ugly I went through and I am afraid if I changed anything (including the bad and the ugly) I might not be where I am today, so basically my bottom line is I would change little to nothing.
Now I admit there are somethings I would like/done such as not smoked, invested more, stay in closer touch with my siblings, had more time with my dad before he died, etc. but these are just polishing the apple type things, not major life changing events. Not things that cause me to lose sleep thinking about them.
“Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest are, "It might have been.”
― Kurt Vonnegut
“Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets.”
― Arthur Miller
“I don't think I could love you so much if you had nothing to complain of and nothing to regret. I don't like people who have never fallen or stumbled. Their virtue is lifeless and of little value. Life hasn't revealed its beauty to them.”
― Boris Pasternak, Doctor Zhivago
“The mistakes I've made are dead to me. But I can't take back the things I never did.”
― Jonathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
“I wouldn't have missed a single minute of it. Not for the whole world.”
― Stephen King
“Heartbreak could be lived with if it weren't accompanied by regret.”
― Laura Kasischke, The Raising
“Sorry I painted the word '****' on your garage door.”
― David Shrigley
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(be home with kids, THEN go back to work if necessary, but hopefully NEVER)
There are a few things I should have stuck with just a little bit longer than I did, and a few things I should have dumped a little bit earlier than I did. In some ways I regret an early marriage but on the other hand if I hadn't had that experience I might not have appreciated how good this husband is.
