Tips to jump start a relationship gone dull? (emotionally, emotional, never)
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Apart from work stress, don't underestimate the weather. It has been one for the record books this year, with ridiculous snowfalls, ice storms, and # of days with windchills into the -20s and -30s. Everyone around here (Southern Ontario) is grouchy and fed up with the weather. I find myself tired and listless on all these dark days. I finally had a burst of energy this past weekend to get stuff done around the house, simply because it was bright and sunny out (although still bitterly cold).
Since the calendar insists that Spring is a few weeks away, hopefully that will give us all something to look forward to, to shake off the winter that feels like it just won't end.
My job is 50 hours a week at a minimum. That can suck the life out of anyone. And yes, I've heard that the east coast winter is BRUTAL this year.
However, you are in an awesome city and there are so many ways to make life more interesting even when you're feeling gloomy.
You probably should be eating healthier. Try some new recipes with your guy and cook them together. If you're typical New Yorkers, you're ordering takeout a lot (at least all my friends do). So change that up a bit and bring some better foods into your life. If you're too tired to cook, my roommate and I have a big stash of frozen homemade soup (no recipe - I just wing it) and we pull out a container of that whenever we don't feel like cooking. Add in some crusty bread, and voila!
You're probably not too tired to watch a movie, right? Have a movie night featuring a stupid comedy that will be guaranteed to make you laugh. Add popcorn and snuggling. I once dragged an ex of mine out of a funk solely by sitting him down and forcing him to watch "Role Models."
Do nice things for each other. Back rub. Flowers. Dessert from a local bakery. Compliments. Expressed gratitude.
Hit some of the museums on your weekends. Even if you've been before, there is always something new to see.
If you have to, just schedule these things in advance. Plan to be present for each other, I guess you could say.
I have been with my partner for 3 years. Lately I have been restless.
I am bored. Sex is dull and infrequent. We both work exhausting jobs and veg out if we are home with one another during the week. The weather in NYC has been awful so we don't feel motivated to go out much right now.
Any tips on giving this relationship a boost? I don't want this to become a bigger problem than it is, and I know this happens to everyone.
Your probably a poor match for each other. time for a trade in.
Your probably a poor match for each other. time for a trade in.
Really?
I think all relationships go through periods of boredom. I am trying not to read into it too much. In the past, when this has happened, my eye has started to wander, and it has never ended well. This time, I want to be proactive because I care about my partner.
Apart from work stress, don't underestimate the weather. It has been one for the record books this year, with ridiculous snowfalls, ice storms, and # of days with windchills into the -20s and -30s. Everyone around here (Southern Ontario) is grouchy and fed up with the weather. I find myself tired and listless on all these dark days. I finally had a burst of energy this past weekend to get stuff done around the house, simply because it was bright and sunny out (although still bitterly cold).
Since the calendar insists that Spring is a few weeks away, hopefully that will give us all something to look forward to, to shake off the winter that feels like it just won't end.
I feel that way too. I keep telling him that things will get better when the weather warms up but its just not happening fast enough. I don't know how people deal with this type of blah weather. We moved from LA in July (he is from SoCal) so the adjustment has been both to culture and climate.
I think all relationships go through periods of boredom. I am trying not to read into it too much. In the past, when this has happened, my eye has started to wander, and it has never ended well. This time, I want to be proactive because I care about my partner.
If you want to spice it up, take the lead. Plan something fun, even if it's indoors and make it about the two of you. The internet has all kinds of cool ideas on it.
Porno and a three way? Just kidding. I've been married for nearly 30 years now. It's never all fun and games and excitement. There were some really horrible times for us and some really great times. A couple of close calls with divorce and times when we were madly in love with each other. The good times will come back to you if the love is there. You have to learn how dress for all kinds of weather. Don't confuse boredom with just being comfortable with someone. Your expectations of constant excitement are unrealistic and you're setting yourself up for disappointment. It sounds like you are in transition from your honeymoon phase into the day to day routine of things.
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