Does being a literal thinker make dating easier and would dating be easier if every one thought more literally? (boyfriends, man)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Is Aspergers this forums ADHD ?
I never even heard of Aspergers till I came to this forum. And someone uses it at least once a week. It's like Penicillin around here. Oh, dude must have Aspergers, cause Aspergers is the diagnosis for everything.
To the OP, when you find a partner that thinks like you do, things are much much easier. As hard as it is to believe, as different as each of us are in the mental aspect, there ARE people with similar viewpoints as you. For some people, it takes longer to find someone close enough to your logic. And then, you actually have to be attracted to each other.
I disagree that assumption is the big problem. I would say jumping to conclusions without effective communication is the real problem in people who misread, and overreact to things.
What else is your definition of "assumption"?~ o.O
Is Aspergers this forums ADHD ?
I never even heard of Aspergers till I came to this forum. And someone uses it at least once a week. It's like Penicillin around here. Oh, dude must have Aspergers, cause Aspergers is the diagnosis for everything.
To the OP, when you find a partner that thinks like you do, things are much much easier. As hard as it is to believe, as different as each of us are in the mental aspect, there ARE people with similar viewpoints as you. For some people, it takes longer to find someone close enough to your logic. And then, you actually have to be attracted to each other.
Thank you to you and to all who had some thing constructive to add to this topic!~ ^_^
No. Becasusr literally thinking and literally speaking usually means that there was very little thought involved. Which explains most of your posts, now that I think about it.
Your opinion is noted, but this seems less like an actual response rather then a thinly veiled insult towards me based off the last few words of your comment.~
Your premise that thinking literally requires very little thought does not seem entirely true, care to elaborate on that and explain why you think that or is this just your personal opinion?~
It's not that I think very little when I am being literal, it's just that I do not jump to unfounded conclusions and this I'm very sure is the basis of many problems for many relationships.~
What would make dating life easier for so many would be to get rid of all the rules, regulations, guidelines, requirements, applications, interviews, stigmas, texting, emails, online dating and slang words. Use real words in real conversations on a real telephone or better yet facing each other at a diner. Be open, honest, attentive and interested in what is being said and who is saying it.
Totally agreed minus the bolded.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chemistry_Guy
The ability to communicate in many ways is probably the most important skillset for dating. Expecting others to suppress their skills in non verbal communication because you need everything spelled out verbally is not really a recipe for success.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Checkered24
I disagree that assumption is the big problem. I would say jumping to conclusions without effective communication is the real problem in people who misread, and overreact to things.
This would be a fair enough definition of making an assumption I think.
OP secret werewolf person, I wouldn't say being "literal" so much as being honest and direct. I don't play games unless preceded by words like video, card, and board. I don't say yes when I mean no. I don't say I'm fine when something is wrong. I don't ask loaded questions, I don't fish for compliments, and I most certainly don't expect anyone to read my mind because frankly, it's too big of a book
Being flirty, playful, and suggestive in a way that's intimate is one thing I'm all about but beyond that, I say what I mean and I don't jump to stupid conclusions. I don't have the patience for ninnyfooting and no that's not a real world but a real sentiment lol There's too much trying to be one step ahead of each other in a sense in dating these days (among other things) and it's not my style.
No. Becasusr literally thinking and literally speaking usually means that there was very little thought involved. Which explains most of your posts, now that I think about it.
Might as well put me on ignore because I am also a "literal thinker" and it does NOT usually mean there is very little thought involved. It simply means the words used are the exact feelings/thoughts, there is no guessing as to what exactly I meant when I said/wrote something.
This would be a fair enough definition of making an assumption I think.
OP secret werewolf person, I wouldn't say being "literal" so much as being honest and direct. I don't play games unless preceded by words like video, card, and board. I don't say yes when I mean no. I don't say I'm fine when something is wrong. I don't ask loaded questions, I don't fish for compliments, and I most certainly don't expect anyone to read my mind because frankly, it's too big of a book
Being flirty, playful, and suggestive in a way that's intimate is one thing I'm all about but beyond that, I say what I mean and I don't jump to stupid conclusions. I don't have the patience for ninnyfooting and no that's not a real world but a real sentiment lol There's too much trying to be one step ahead of each other in a sense in dating these days (among other things) and it's not my style.
If you don't agree with the bolded, why agree with any of it. Is there something wrong with real conversations, using real words, face to face in a real diner? How in the world are you really going to get to know someone well without spending actual time in their physical presence talking to them?
If you don't agree with the bolded, why agree with any of it. Is there something wrong with real conversations, using real words, face to face in a real diner? How in the world are you really going to get to know someone well without spending actual time in their physical presence talking to them?
To the first question, because I don't dismiss an entire thought just because I don't agree with a portion of it. To the second, here's what you said:
Quote:
What would make dating life easier for so many would be to get rid of all the rules, regulations, guidelines, requirements, applications, interviews, stigmas, texting, emails, online dating and slang words. Use real words in real conversations on a real telephone or better yet facing each other at a diner. Be open, honest, attentive and interested in what is being said and who is saying it.
I don't agree with the bolded because you included it in the list of things to get rid of. There's nothing wrong with texting unless that's the only way you endeavor to communicate. The same goes for emails except that emails can be just as intimate and engaging as real time conversations on the phone or in person, unless you treat emails like texts instead of like thoughtfully written letters.
There's also nothing wrong with online dating. There are plenty of people who found a partner they really connect with and developed a fulfilling offline relationship with via online dating when they were in a rut trying to do it any other way. For them, having it as an option made dating easier. And there's nothing wrong with slang. That's a cultural thing unless what you specifically meant was internet speak/abbreviations like LOLz OMG YOLO?
Nothing is wrong with real conversations face to face in a real diner, either. I just included that in my bolded because the tone kind of implied that these things are mutually exclusive - that if you text, email, date online, or use slang, you don't engage in or value interactions considered more personal like talking on the phone or in person.
I think I get what you were trying to say, that dating would be better if people valued face time and real time conversations and interactions across the board the way that they used to instead of trying to live out their whole life and relationship through computers and phones and I agree. I just wanted it to be clear that the way it was put in that one part of the post wasn't what I was agreeing with.
This would be a fair enough definition of making an assumption I think.
OP secret werewolf person, I wouldn't say being "literal" so much as being honest and direct. I don't play games unless preceded by words like video, card, and board. I don't say yes when I mean no. I don't say I'm fine when something is wrong. I don't ask loaded questions, I don't fish for compliments, and I most certainly don't expect anyone to read my mind because frankly, it's too big of a book
Being flirty, playful, and suggestive in a way that's intimate is one thing I'm all about but beyond that, I say what I mean and I don't jump to stupid conclusions. I don't have the patience for ninnyfooting and no that's not a real world but a real sentiment lol There's too much trying to be one step ahead of each other in a sense in dating these days (among other things) and it's not my style.
Well said.~
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
