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I think the dangers (or rather, pitfalls) of interacting with someone that is hundreds or thousands of miles away from you is that the potential is there to become very attracted to their personality as well as their physicality (via photographs, Skype, videos). When it's established that the feelings of intense attraction on every level is mutual - then what? Who decides who is going to eventually relocate to the other person's locality to further cement and continue the relationship?
But on the other hand, the person that may be just right for you could be on the opposite side of the country! Should distance determine how we would (or even should) pursue a long lasting and possibly happy relationship?
Has this ever influenced your decision to pursue a person you're very interested in on every level? Would you totally dismiss a person that you're crazy about if they lived a thousand miles from you? Or, would you give it a shot to see what would happen?
I did give it a shot, went to Houston for 6 months with a temp job and temp apartment just to see. BUT I knew the guy in real life, and we had been together in person numerous times. I would never, ever, consider moving without knowing them in person as well, and without "trying it on" IRL like I did, because when it's online, you don't know how they are or how they deal with day to day things. I think "who moves" is very dependent on the person. In my case, he couldn't move as he had a son whose Mom lived in his area, and I have a very portable job I can do anywhere.
Anyway, I learned that I really don't want to leave my family, I like where I live, and I also want someone who lives near me, so after we broke up I wouldn't date anyone more than 50 miles from me.
Some folks are intimidated by distance when it comes to relationships. I wasn't. My wife and I were a mere 7000 miles apart when we met, and eventually married. I'm here to tell ya it sucked at times being that far apart. But when we were able to get together, it meant everything to me.
And now that we are married and living in the same state...we still have to spend a majority of our time apart due to our occupations. I get to the point of wanting to quit my job because it keeps me away from home for 2 to 4 weeks at a time, even though I'm still in state.
Some folks are intimidated by distance when it comes to relationships. I wasn't. My wife and I were a mere 7000 miles apart when we met, and eventually married. I'm here to tell ya it sucked at times being that far apart. But when we were able to get together, it meant everything to me.
And now that we are married and living in the same state...we still have to spend a majority of our time apart due to our occupations. I get to the point of wanting to quit my job because it keeps me away from home for 2 to 4 weeks at a time, even though I'm still in state.
Wow, 7,000 miles!! It's awesome that you guys didn't let that stop you from being together. But, ya'll need to try to find some time to spend more time together! Whatever it takes...
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Personally, distance is a consideration I take into effect. I want my SO to be in my physical presence often. Touching them, hearing them laugh live, looking into their eyes is important to me. That is why I'm limiting my search to the greater Washington DC, Baltimore, and Richmond area.
I wouldn't completely give up on a relationship because we didn't live close to each other. There comes a point though where it doesn't make sense to be so far apart and maintain that relationship. That is when someone needs to decide to move to the area the other one lives in. My ex-husband had just gotten a promotion just before I met him and had to move to the other end of the state (10/11 hr. drive) less than 2mos. after we met. We were engaged before he left and spent a couple of months apart before we got married. It was obvious to us that it made much more sense for me to move where he was as he just got a promotion and we hoped to start a family right away so I wasn't going to be working. I am single now and older and all my children live with me or near me, so if I met someone now I would not move very far away at all.
hehe yeah, they can sometimes be a little derpy, eh?
@Brokencrayola: I'm in the same situation you're in now. My children live with me and near me, and most of my immediate family lives nearby as well, so if I were single and met a guy, he would either have to be local or willing to relocate.
@Dissenter: Yes. Being physically near them and with the person on a daily basis, I feel, is necessary to cultivate the loving bond that already exists between two people. LDRs can work, but only if it's temporary. I couldn't imagine living out my entire life loving someone from a distance like that.
@ocnjgirl: Good post and spot on. I'd want to be with my guy and around him on a daily basis and share the little things in life together as well as the larger more important ones.
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It's awesome that you guys didn't let that stop you from being together. 
But, ya'll need to try to find some time to spend more time together! Whatever it takes...
I'd want to be with my guy and around him on a daily basis and share the little things in life together as well as the larger more important ones.
