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Old 08-21-2012, 10:23 AM
 
2,758 posts, read 4,959,719 times
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Is it possible to start as friends, enter into a relationship, then go back to friends?
Yoh see it on TV often, but I have NEVER been able to going back to friends after being physical.
Once sex happens, there is no going back IME.

I am curious about a friend, and I want to try and see if there could be more, but I honestly don't know how well a relationship with this person would work.

But, like I said, I am curious.

How many of you have been able to go from friend, to more, then back to friend again ?

And how did you NOT ruin the friendship in the process ?
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Old 08-21-2012, 10:28 AM
 
11,864 posts, read 17,004,194 times
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I've done this just recently. In fact, he and I just talked about it yesterday. We realized how unusual we were in that respect. We're still really close and talk every day.

Only you know yourself and whether you can handle it. Good luck.
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Old 08-21-2012, 10:37 AM
 
4,380 posts, read 4,451,528 times
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I went from friends to FWB back to friends with someone in college. It did almost ruin our friendship, but time and distance (we moved to different towns after graduation) healed it. We're still friends 16 years later.
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Old 08-21-2012, 10:38 AM
 
Location: Virginia
142 posts, read 505,890 times
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I did this recently, also. We were both VERY honest upfront, making sure we were on the same page. We had been friends for years, actually, and then the opportunty came to see if there was something more. There ended up not being, but since we were both open with our communication, it worked out fine. Neither of us held anything back, and both of us agreed that we'd try and if it didn't work out, we'd go back to being good friends, which we are!
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Old 08-21-2012, 10:40 AM
 
Location: On the corner of Grey Street
6,126 posts, read 10,109,941 times
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I think it can work if both people really agree in the end that you're better off as just friends. If one person feels you're better as friends and the other person really want a relationship, then no it won't work. You have to be on the same page.
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Old 08-21-2012, 10:44 AM
 
Location: Oakland, CA
28,226 posts, read 36,883,248 times
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Some people can. Some people can't.....
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Old 08-21-2012, 10:53 AM
 
Location: Boston
701 posts, read 1,563,300 times
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I'm currently doing something like that now, and yeah, it's rather hard but we're getting by pretty well. I also agree that some can't do it and some can.

I think not ruining the friendship, for me, came with cutting out sex and kissing completely. I'll ask for a hug from time to time, but it doesn't go further than that. Also, I live with this person now + one other roommate, so I have to be mature about the situation. Though, that person hasn't starting looking around yet and nor have I, so we'll see just how mature one of us acts when it does happen. Hopefully, on my end, the twinge of jealously would be a nothing but a distant memory by then.
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Old 08-21-2012, 12:27 PM
 
1,259 posts, read 1,836,360 times
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We were not able to. I would say we are moreso associates than we are friends now. Just didn't work out.
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Old 08-21-2012, 12:33 PM
 
Location: NY
9,130 posts, read 20,015,449 times
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I am sure it can happen, but I would say it is fairly rare. Maybe as one person explained, they had a FWB situation and remained regular friends afterwards. I would think that might be the more common way, where neither party ends up forming too deep of a bond for the other when the relationship turns physical, because those that get too attached will have trouble letting that attachment go and still be able to enjoy the relationship.
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Old 08-21-2012, 02:22 PM
 
Location: Reno, NV
5,987 posts, read 10,472,793 times
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I've been able to a few times. However, it depends on the people, and also on why the relationship attempt didn't work. If you're just not a good match as a couple, you can often return to being friends, but if one cheats or one wants the relationship and the other no longer does, it probably won't work.
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