looking for the way to make life better despite my obstacles (long-term, how to)
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I have had many, many struggles in life and it has taken its toll on me. I don't wanna hear any stupid quotes like "God doesn't give us more what we can handle" crap.
Other not so healthy choices I'm addicted to are beer and cigarettes. Its my way of escaping the pains of reality. All the meds, counseling, and therapy in the world isn't going cure my feelings of loneliness, social rejection, and extreme shyness.
I usually drink 4 6hr. energy shots mixed with juice within an hour. Usually several times a week, I drink the mixture. Just curious what the long-term effects are on the body? I like the way it speeds up my heart making me feel more alive and having more energy.
I have only met 1 guy that's ever taken a strong interest in my life since I was in grade school. We have had our ups and downs. He's a functional heroin user (has a job and lives on his own) and yes, I've been around it and have no interest in trying it. Last month, I ignored his calls for 10 days until I ran into him unexpectedly which made everything awkward. Since then he has contacted me first maybe 2-3x. I ignored him because I want to imagine what life would be without him. While he is a friend, things do change within time.
To make matters worse, one of his female friends joked around with me about how much I liked him and that he's my boo. I haven't heard from in 6 days. I feel like an a**hole for ignoring him and don't how to make it up to him.
Because of my deafness and hearing difficulty, it makes it extremely difficult to go out and meet people. I've tried meeting other guys and none of them has taken an interest in me like he has.
I have had many, many struggles in life and it has taken its toll on me. I don't wanna hear any stupid quotes like "God doesn't give us more what we can handle" crap.
Other not so healthy choices I'm addicted to are beer and cigarettes. Its my way of escaping the pains of reality. All the meds, counseling, and therapy in the world isn't going cure my feelings of loneliness, social rejection, and extreme shyness.
I usually drink 4 6hr. energy shots mixed with juice within an hour. Usually several times a week, I drink the mixture. Just curious what the long-term effects are on the body? I like the way it speeds up my heart making me feel more alive and having more energy.
I have only met 1 guy that's ever taken a strong interest in my life since I was in grade school. We have had our ups and downs. He's a functional heroin user (has a job and lives on his own) and yes, I've been around it and have no interest in trying it. Last month, I ignored his calls for 10 days until I ran into him unexpectedly which made everything awkward. Since then he has contacted me first maybe 2-3x. I ignored him because I want to imagine what life would be without him. While he is a friend, things do change within time.
To make matters worse, one of his female friends joked around with me about how much I liked him and that he's my boo. I haven't heard from in 6 days. I feel like an a**hole for ignoring him and don't how to make it up to him.
Because of my deafness and hearing difficulty, it makes it extremely difficult to go out and meet people. I've tried meeting other guys and none of them has taken an interest in me like he has.
Not undercutting your experiences but everybody on this board has had struggles that have taken a toll on us....If you are "looking for a better way to make a better life" -- it starts with your decision making process. Getting involved with a heroin user, functioning or non functioning, trying it or not wanting to try it is completely irrelevant: Simply involving yourself in his life is going to create a whole new set of issues for you. If you truly want to get over these obstacles, then don't pile more on. So, forget about this guy. Period. If you aren't willing to do that, then going on is just going to be a waste of time here. Counseling and meds aren't going to cure your loneliness but the patch (or smoking cessation) and AA meetings for the drinking are a start in a new direction. Catch my drift? Medication has made my depression 'slightly' better & therapy is a waste of time except for this: she is a sounding board and a second opinion.
I don't talk to anyone about personal matters, so it's nice to talk to someone about them sometimes. So maybe try those suggestions with that in mind and not with the idea that it's going to cure your loneliness & social rejection. I have lived alone my entire adult life with the exception of family members early on. I could name 4 or 5 things I could do to better my life, but I choose not to do them (I have my own issues). Sometimes people KNOW what they should do, they just choose not to do it. I and others here, can look at your situation and see things that could help you and you could try; like the stuff I mentioned above. But you have to be honest with yourself though and ask if you really want to try and fix these problems because if like me you aren't really interested in trying, everything else is moot. These are just my thoughts on the matter.
Are you connected to other Deaf adults in your area? Just asking because I had deaf friends in two cities where I lived and the happiest of those were involved in activities with other deaf adults and families and hearing folks who had bothered to learn to communicate (whether by sign or other means).
I really, really am aware how isolating hearing loss can be.
I have had many, many struggles in life and it has taken its toll on me. I don't wanna hear any stupid quotes like "God doesn't give us more what we can handle" crap.
Other not so healthy choices I'm addicted to are beer and cigarettes. Its my way of escaping the pains of reality. All the meds, counseling, and therapy in the world isn't going cure my feelings of loneliness, social rejection, and extreme shyness.
I usually drink 4 6hr. energy shots mixed with juice within an hour. Usually several times a week, I drink the mixture. Just curious what the long-term effects are on the body? I like the way it speeds up my heart making me feel more alive and having more energy.
I have only met 1 guy that's ever taken a strong interest in my life since I was in grade school. We have had our ups and downs. He's a functional heroin user (has a job and lives on his own) and yes, I've been around it and have no interest in trying it. Last month, I ignored his calls for 10 days until I ran into him unexpectedly which made everything awkward. Since then he has contacted me first maybe 2-3x. I ignored him because I want to imagine what life would be without him. While he is a friend, things do change within time.
To make matters worse, one of his female friends joked around with me about how much I liked him and that he's my boo. I haven't heard from in 6 days. I feel like an a**hole for ignoring him and don't how to make it up to him.
Because of my deafness and hearing difficulty, it makes it extremely difficult to go out and meet people. I've tried meeting other guys and none of them has taken an interest in me like he has.
Sounds to me like you're too busy feeling sorry for yourself to get anywhere.
I am sorry to hear about the partially deaf part, that must be very difficult.
All the rest, grow up and fix your life and stop expecting us to feel sorry for your poor choices.
I usually drink 4 6hr. energy shots mixed with juice within an hour. Usually several times a week, I drink the mixture. Just curious what the long-term effects are on the body? I like the way it speeds up my heart making me feel more alive and having more energy.
Please stop doing that.
If you want to increase your heartrate and feel more alive, try to incorporate some physical activity into your day, and make it a daily routine. This will help override negative emotions and lack of motivation entirely by fueling your brain with natural happy vibes.
Katie,
Most guys don't want to have anything to do with an addict, other than maybe a quick roll in the hay, and sometimes not even that. That being said, as long as beer and cigarettes, and energy drinks are so very important to you, most guys are not going to be interested in you. You don't think you are an addict? Then give up the beer and cigarettes and energy drinks and see how you feel. If energy drinks make you 'feel good, speed up your heart and makes you feel alive', that should be a warning they are not good for your body. Your life is your own business, you are in charge of it, you have to live with the choices you make in life. Make the right choices if you want happiness and a longer life. The right choices are not drinking yourself into a stupor...
I have had many, many struggles in life and it has taken its toll on me. I don't wanna hear any stupid quotes like "God doesn't give us more what we can handle" crap.
Other not so healthy choices I'm addicted to are beer and cigarettes. Its my way of escaping the pains of reality. All the meds, counseling, and therapy in the world isn't going cure my feelings of loneliness, social rejection, and extreme shyness.
I usually drink 4 6hr. energy shots mixed with juice within an hour. Usually several times a week, I drink the mixture. Just curious what the long-term effects are on the body? I like the way it speeds up my heart making me feel more alive and having more energy.
I have only met 1 guy that's ever taken a strong interest in my life since I was in grade school. We have had our ups and downs. He's a functional heroin user (has a job and lives on his own) and yes, I've been around it and have no interest in trying it. Last month, I ignored his calls for 10 days until I ran into him unexpectedly which made everything awkward. Since then he has contacted me first maybe 2-3x. I ignored him because I want to imagine what life would be without him. While he is a friend, things do change within time.
To make matters worse, one of his female friends joked around with me about how much I liked him and that he's my boo. I haven't heard from in 6 days. I feel like an a**hole for ignoring him and don't how to make it up to him.
Because of my deafness and hearing difficulty, it makes it extremely difficult to go out and meet people. I've tried meeting other guys and none of them has taken an interest in me like he has.
I guess I am confused... Why are you trying to refrain from speaking to this guy? If he is the only one who shows any interest in you, wouldn't you want him in your life? You said hes a function heroin addict, but you dont seem to be exactly drug free either. If he is nice to you, if he isn't inhibiting your ability to live, why are you just ignoring him? If he is, then please ignore that comment.
Anyway, you should definitely stop with the 5 hour energy crap. You are driving yourself to a heart attack at a very young age. The caffeine in a single 5 hour energy is enough to give anyone a heart attack when used everyday. Your using 5! Also, the cigarettes and beer are going to work against you when your talking heart health.
Physical health aside. You need to get out more. Put yourself out there and dont fear rejection. As others mentioned, go to events that deaf adults attend. Make some friends, or at the very least, just meet other people. The minute you can get over your insecurities and start changing something for yourself, is the time when you can finally start to feel better about your position.
'If you want something you've never had, you must be willing to do something you've never done.' - Thomas Jefferson
The deaf community in most areas is pretty tightly knit... Why not get connected locally? I took American Sign Language in College and the deaf community in my city was very connected.
Those addictions will prematurely age you and destroy your health.
Instead of starting yet another thread about your woes, go back and read all the great advice that's been given to you since 2010. Maybe if you listened to some of it and applied it to your life you wouldn't be sitting here in 2012 asking the same thing over and over.
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