Psychology of nosy people at work

[Dopo]

I'm trying to understand nosy people at work

Here's the scenario
Bob is the person that seems nosy, Bob goes to Bill's office to talk
I know for a fact, that the moment I walk in from of Bill's office, even though Bob is talking to him, Bob is gonna look outside the moment he hears somebody walking by, just to see who's walking by.

It happens every single time.
What's the reason for that?
It's as if he's more concerned about who's walking outside than the conversation he's having in the office.

[Lilac110]

What I'm wondering is why you're paying so much attention to Bob.

Isn't this a little bit like the kettle calling the pot black?

[Dopo]

I see it because when I walk up the stairs I'm looking right into the office and then I have to turn
Bob was talking to Bill and always turns to see who is walking by

[Tracysherm]

I have a person who might be worse than Bob.

One of our execs can't stand when anyone meets with anyone and she is not involved. If I meet with someone with the door shut, she hovers outside my office door peeking in the window next to the door. I do investigations, so I often have to interview people behind a closed door, but she's always asking who that person was and what it was about. If I have few people together in a conference room, and she wasn't invited, because the topic did not involve her, it drives her crazy. She has to hover around the conference room in question, asking what meeting is going on and what is the topic.

Her office is right next to mine, and sometimes she'll intrude, coming to my door, saying "I just overheard you discussing XYZ, and here's what I think..."

If she comes into my office to talk about something, she has to look at the papers on my desk or what's on my computer screen and ask about it. It's so intrusive. I feel like I should leave porn lying on my desk or something.



I tend to just focus on the stuff that concerns me. If a bunch of people are in a conference room and I'm not invited, and if I even notice it, I'm relieved to not be there: whew! one fewer meeting. I probably don't even notice when people have their office door closed, or when people have someone in their office, but if I did, I wouldn't care at all what they were talking about, unless perhaps if they were pointing at me while they talked.

[Dopo]

TracySam this "Bob" is very similar
if I'm having a conversation with somebody in their office with their door open, he just walks in and start talking as if we are hanging out at the bar.

Anytime I do that I say "Excuse me" and most of the time I say "Can I talk to you when you guys are done talking?" and then let them finish their conversation.

[ItsRick24]

Originally Posted by Dopo

I see it because when I walk up the stairs I'm looking right into the office and then I have to turn
Bob was talking to Bill and always turns to see who is walking by

So Bob turns to see who's walking by. Big deal! As long as he's not talking about you, or gossiping, so what?

[Dopo]

Originally Posted by ItsRick24

So Bob turns to see who's walking by. Big deal! As long as he's not talking about you, or gossiping, so what?

Half of the time stops his conversation in the office to greet the people walking by

[oh-eve]

Why do you care? Let him look. It's just a habit.

[Lilac110]

Originally Posted by Dopo

I see it because when I walk up the stairs I'm looking right into the office and then I have to turn
Bob was talking to Bill and always turns to see who is walking by

So you're basically coming up behind Bob while he has his back turned to the staircase.

I really think you're making much ado about nothing. If he's a boss, he could be looking to see if it's one of his employees. If he's working on a project with someone, he may just want to know that the person is there to talk to about it. He may just want to say hello to people. Or maybe he doesn't like people coming up behind him.

I'm sure you don't wear blinders. When you're sitting in a room, you don't look up to see who enters? Aren't you aware of your surroundings?

I would let this go. Unless you're Bob's employee and you're coming in late every morning, there's nothing to worry about. He's not harming you in any way.

[Dopo]

I was just asking a question to get other people's opinion of the psychology behind that attitude