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This country has a obscenely high amount of sexual predators, that is the reason for the "hysteria" as you call it. Obviously, children need to be protected, and if this law saves one child, then it is worth it. Even if a few fathers have to be inconvenienced, you'd think they'd care more about children's safety and less about being confronted or emberassed.
If this is indeed the case where is that stat listed? Moreover, if that's the case why do you think that is? I for one do not believe that for a minute. I'm betting we're pretty average with the rest of the world when it comes to this except due to our freedom of speech and free media we hear about it more. Need I mention the countries where the age of consent (if one exists) is extreamely low or the ones that don't even admit that there's gay people that live there (Iran)?
Of course there are those that believe we are the most evil country on earth (and some of those live here) so of course we'd have more than anywhere else.
Sure if it "saves" one child then it's worth destroying hundreds of lives and making it impossible for any male to walk in a park, go anywhere with their child, work in a school or any job that has to do with kids.. Yeah, good trade off.
I guess my next question would be who's next and what's your agenda? We know Bill O's, MONEY...
This country has a obscenely high amount of sexual predators, that is the reason for the "hysteria" as you call it. Obviously, children need to be protected, and if this law saves one child, then it is worth it. Even if a few fathers have to be inconvenienced, you'd think they'd care more about children's safety and less about being confronted or emberassed.
Why stop at the fathers? Why don't we just put a watch on all the women too? Women abuse their children just as much as men... why only limit this law to men? I personally wouldn't want a child abuser/sexual predator around my child, but that doesn't warrant me judging EVERY man that sits at a playground "looking"...
Just as everyone's said, how in heaven's name are you going to just "assume" they're not with their son or daughter? That's hypocritical judgment. YOU'RE there watching your child aren't you... Why can't they? Oh... because they're male.
Well... there are millions of bad PARENTS in America... yes, including women. So why not watch EVERYONE that goes near your child? Why pinpoint men? And as much as people don't WANT to believe that women are sexual abusers too, there are plenty out there. Granted there's not as many as males, but they're out there... But oh wait... "Better safe than sorry..." as most of you would say right? Then let's just pass the law "just in case"... If it saves the life of one child, then it's worth it to inconvenience the rest of the country right?
You make it sound as if all men who happen to be at a park while kids are present are some sort of '' Aqualung''. Its people like you who perpetuate hysteria in my opinion. you begin with a ''he's guilty'' attitude and make men prove their innocence.
Not all men, but they do go there. Maybe you would be shocked to hear that they even show up at the schools. They had a completely naked man show up at my daughters school. I'm sure he wasn't up to anything bad.
Quote:
Originally Posted by decafdave
Don't you think your attitude towards men is a bit unhealthy? As a mother you've seen the stuff the media forces down our throats but you seem to be overreacting. If I was a father and you or some other concerned mother confronted me for walking with my daughter I wouldn't even answer you.
From your posts you strike me as quite sexist. And sexism, just like racism or any other form of hate is not only wrong but illogical. Oh but I guess since you're a woman you can't think logically right? Generalizing mght be harmless at its best but you're type is downright harmful. When you're daughter gets older how is she going to have a healthy relationship with a guy if her only information comes from your biased opinion? You have the right to hate men but there's no need for her to go down the same road.
I would not approach someone who was there with his child. However if you were there alone, leering at children and I observed this I might approach you. I would rather a cop do it or a Father who was there but I make no apologies for protecting my daughter. I have had a man taking pictures of my daughter at a park before. He wasn't there with anyone.
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Originally Posted by slove1106
And I take it you wouldn't be offended if a man/woman came up to you and asked ("demanded") you the same... correct? Unfortunately, the small box that we live in today only focuses on MEN as being sexual predators/abusers when there are also women doing the same.
Why would it be any different if society started getting paranoid about women and children...? What if in a few years society starts targeting women who sit at a park and watch their children play? Well why not? Who's to say that won't be next... there are plenty of women offenders these days...
Women always jump up and are quick to judge men who love children and say they're "protecting" their children by being leery of men around their children, but if the situation were turned around, they'd be the first to get offended...
There's nothing "protective" by jumping into a bandwagon that just pushes unhealthy views of men, good fathers and the actual good male role models that exist. These are usually the type of women that have had some sort of negative experience with one man in their life, so now they want to pass this hate of men down to the next generation and let the atrocity continue.
That's sad to judge and stay leery of every man that walks around with a child alone and just assume the worst. Yes, there are predators out there, but to steer clear of every man you see at a playground... that's just absurd.
I personally don't want my children around "rude" and "offensive" people with bad attitudes. I think that's bad for my children to be around. I think we should kick those people off the playground as well. That's bad for my child. Oh, while we're at it, since they're passing on their rudeness and bad attitudes to their children who play with my children... I'd rather my children don't play with their children either... But no, it's the nice innocent man who brought his child to play at the playground that we want to kick out and bash... why... because he's a man. Way to focus on the important things with our children's upbringing...
By the way, I'm a woman.
I would not be offended if someone wanted to know why I was there, had not seen I was there with my daughter, not at all. I understand the concern. Again, its the person man or woman sitting watching intently the children that they have no connection to.
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Originally Posted by djacques
Most sexual abuse victims are not harmed emotionally for the rest of their lives; that is a myth, and is an example of why some of us call this whole attitude you are evincing "hysteria"--it's based on fear, not on facts.
I don't even know where to start to point out the uninformated nature of this statement. Its just a phallacy that most people know better then to even say. I have known both male and female victims and you do them each an injustice in saying what you do.
It must be a terrible dark frustrating world to live in if you think every man out there is looking at your young daughter in "that way", or son for that matter. It is sad that somebody would even try and bring a law like that up. I mean what has the world come to. Yeah I know perverts are out there, I am not stupid, and I have young children but if I spent my days looking at people and feeling like theire going to assault my kids I think I would crack.
I am protective, but there are things that go too far. If somebody came up to me and questioned me id tell them to go away, and if they persued me, I know it would come to them lieing on the ground.
It must be a terrible dark frustrating world to live in if you think every man out there is looking at your young daughter in "that way", or son for that matter. It is sad that somebody would even try and bring a law like that up. I mean what has the world come to. Yeah I know perverts are out there, I am not stupid, and I have young children but if I spent my days looking at people and feeling like theire going to assault my kids I think I would crack.
I am protective, but there are things that go too far. If somebody came up to me and questioned me id tell them to go away, and if they persued me, I know it would come to them lieing on the ground.
Well if you would read my posts I don't believe ALL men are like that but the reality is that most abusers are men. Its also true that they don't wear a brand on their forehead. If a man who is not related to us takes an unusual interest in my daughter then I am going to take notice.
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Originally Posted by doc1
Isn't most sexual abuse of children done by relatives? That's who you need to keep away from your children.
'Specially if they're uncles.
It is true that a child is more likely to be sexually abused by a person who is known to them, like a male relative or friend of the family. Believe me I keep an eye on that as well but thats not what this thread was about.
If I had a son, then I would have a SHARP eye on his female teachers as well. This is not a sexist thing at all.
As far as stats, maybe you should put your zip code into the sex offender listings and see where they are. Go to their neighborhoods and see the children they have access to. We had a really nasty hotel in our town where sex offenders lived. There was a bus stop at that very corner. If one of them had chosen to, they could have grabbed one of those children with little or no effort. The owner finally tore it down and built a car wash.
How can anyone be more concerned about ANYTHING then the safety of our children? Maybe you truly don't understand the chaos that sexual abuse causes in a childs life, I get that but you have to at least investigate it to find out rather then sweeping it aside. Talk to a survivor or two, look full on at the destruction it causes in their lives.
I dont beleive there are any more offenders now than before either though. Its just easier to find them now on the register, and even at that not all on that list deserve to be there. I know a "sexual predator" who was only two years older than his "victim" and her parents where pissed, he got prosecuted and is on the sex offenders list for life.
Sad reality is that they are happily married for circa 10 years with 3 kids. Yah he deserves to be there and really deserves to be scrutinised by you and others. The world has gone so PC its mad I think.
I dont beleive there are any more offenders now than before either though. Its just easier to find them now on the register, and even at that not all on that list deserve to be there. I know a "sexual predator" who was only two years older than his "victim" and her parents where pissed, he got prosecuted and is on the sex offenders list for life.
Sad reality is that they are happily married for circa 10 years with 3 kids. Yah he deserves to be there and really deserves to be scrutinised by you and others. The world has gone so PC its mad I think.
I have to agree with you there, a couple of kids having sex does not equal a sex offender and their victim. I do believe the way that situation is approached needs to be changed. I think its more likely that the parents are mad that they didn't watch their kid more closely and they are trying to place the blame other then on their own shoulders HOWEVER, thats now what we are talking about. We are talking about adult men who are attracted to children.
I was at the pool in our neighborhood the other day, a man who had to be 45 if he was a day was openly leering at a group of girls who couldn't have been even 16. They were blissfully unaware of his attention. I wear very dark sunglasses, you can't see what I am looking at so I was able to watch as things unfolded. I found his behavior disgusting. At one point while he was watching he put his magazine down in his lap as if he was trying to hide something if you know what I mean.
I have to agree with you there, a couple of kids having sex does not equal a sex offender and their victim. I do believe the way that situation is approached needs to be changed. I think its more likely that the parents are mad that they didn't watch their kid more closely and they are trying to place the blame other then on their own shoulders HOWEVER, thats now what we are talking about. We are talking about adult men who are attracted to children.
I was at the pool in our neighborhood the other day, a man who had to be 45 if he was a day was openly leering at a group of girls who couldn't have been even 16. They were blissfully unaware of his attention. I wear very dark sunglasses, you can't see what I am looking at so I was able to watch as things unfolded. I found his behavior disgusting. At one point while he was watching he put his magazine down in his lap as if he was trying to hide something if you know what I mean.
Ms. Lindsey,
Although I believe you suffer from a small case of paranoia, I DO believe you have childrens best interests at heart. However, do you realize that just THE ACCUSATION that someone is eyeing a child with bad intent could absolutely ruin a persons life, career, marriage or even the ability to be with their own children? Could you imagine the residual effects of accusing someone of something like this? Even if they prove their innocence in a court of law, they will probably be broke and a pariah in the community. For what? Sitting on a park bench and, in YOUR opinion, looking the wrong way at a child? This law, in my opinion, is vague and unenforceable as it requires someone to OPINIONATE on what the intent of A LOOK is. Good luck with that one! Have a nice day though!
Location: Georgia, on the Florida line, right above Tallahassee
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lindsey_Mcfarren
I have to agree with you there, a couple of kids having sex does not equal a sex offender and their victim. I do believe the way that situation is approached needs to be changed. I think its more likely that the parents are mad that they didn't watch their kid more closely and they are trying to place the blame other then on their own shoulders HOWEVER, thats now what we are talking about. We are talking about adult men who are attracted to children.
I was at the pool in our neighborhood the other day, a man who had to be 45 if he was a day was openly leering at a group of girls who couldn't have been even 16. They were blissfully unaware of his attention. I wear very dark sunglasses, you can't see what I am looking at so I was able to watch as things unfolded. I found his behavior disgusting. At one point while he was watching he put his magazine down in his lap as if he was trying to hide something if you know what I mean.
So...did you call him on his behavior? Or did you do nothing?
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