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Old 06-16-2016, 03:56 PM
 
32,516 posts, read 37,240,559 times
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Hopefully her father, while he was being a "resource", also explained to her that some businesses offer parking validation.
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Old 06-16-2016, 05:04 PM
 
Location: here
24,873 posts, read 36,222,874 times
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This is where my anxiety comes in handy. Sine I can remember, I've never gone anywhere without cash. I also had a CC at 18.
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Old 06-16-2016, 06:16 PM
 
14,377 posts, read 11,778,946 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryleeII View Post
I knew someone would say that.....some parents simply turn their backs on their kids and call it "good parenting"
Well, let's see. Your daughter is 19 and so inexperienced and irresponsible that it didn't occur to her that going into the city with no way to pay for anything wasn't a good idea. Did she not bring her wallet? (Her driver's license??) She doesn't have a car, or, apparently, a job.

Yet, she insists she is an "adult," is rude to her parents, and is playing house with a boyfriend. I don't advocate "turning my back on my kid," but under these specific circumstances, I would make my role as a resource very limited indeed. She wants to be an adult, fine, let her be an adult and figure out things on her own. If she wants help, at the very least she should at least be respectful and admit she has a lot to learn.

I hope you are not financially supporting her, too.
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Old 06-16-2016, 06:58 PM
 
6,191 posts, read 7,372,756 times
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I don't think it's as big of a deal as some people are making it out to be. I'm sure she learned her lesson, though I think it was strange she started crying and being in a panic about it.

Once I dozed off and I woke up in a panic because I was supposed to be somewhere. Half-asleep, I threw a few things in a bag and took off to the city. I got there and realized I was $0.25 short of buying a ticket to a different train. Oops. I asked a stranger for a quarter. I guess my parents have failed me.

I'll be honest, I have been without cash before many times, much to the annoyance of my mother, but I almost always have an ATM/CC with me. If it were me, I would have just walked back out of the garage and gone to an ATM. Any reason why she doesn't have an ATM/CC?
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Old 06-16-2016, 07:38 PM
 
2,441 posts, read 2,613,758 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by saibot View Post
Well, let's see. Your daughter is 19 and so inexperienced and irresponsible that it didn't occur to her that going into the city with no way to pay for anything wasn't a good idea. Did she not bring her wallet? (Her driver's license??) She doesn't have a car, or, apparently, a job.

Yet, she insists she is an "adult," is rude to her parents, and is playing house with a boyfriend. I don't advocate "turning my back on my kid," but under these specific circumstances, I would make my role as a resource very limited indeed. She wants to be an adult, fine, let her be an adult and figure out things on her own. If she wants help, at the very least she should at least be respectful and admit she has a lot to learn.

I hope you are not financially supporting her, too.
I think she learned her lesson.

I thought it was customary for American teenagers to move out as soon as they finish high school? Why is this an issue?
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Old 06-16-2016, 08:08 PM
 
14,377 posts, read 11,778,946 times
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Originally Posted by WildColonialGirl View Post
I thought it was customary for American teenagers to move out as soon as they finish high school? Why is this an issue
Not around here, unless they are going to college and living on campus. Otherwise, it is very (very) much expected that if they want to live independently, they get a job and provide a majority of their own financial support.

I don't know anything about the OP's daughter and who is paying for what, so I'm not referring to that. But you asked for my opinion and here it is. If my child was not going to school, not working, and moved in with a boy/girlfriend because two of them claimed to be "adults," I would not be paying for their rent, food, gas, car insurance, etc. I know that legally I need to keep my child on my health insurance until age 26 (which is kind of insane in itself). But that would be about it.
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Old 06-16-2016, 08:11 PM
 
13,981 posts, read 25,995,970 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WildColonialGirl View Post
I think she learned her lesson.

I thought it was customary for American teenagers to move out as soon as they finish high school? Why is this an issue?
Once upon a time it was customary, not these days. And, there IS a history behind the post you responded to.

But, like the OP, I would just chalk this up to a lesson learned. And, some kids need to repeat mistakes before they get it. I have a 25 yr old, college graduate son, who somehow managed to miss not one, but three flights over the past 2.5 weeks! And only once was it because of abnormally long lines at security.
It cost him, not me, so it may sink in faster than for the OP's daughter, but hopefully she'll get the job and pay her dad back.
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Old 06-16-2016, 10:08 PM
 
10,116 posts, read 19,437,605 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by saibot View Post
Not around here, unless they are going to college and living on campus. Otherwise, it is very (very) much expected that if they want to live independently, they get a job and provide a majority of their own financial support.

I don't know anything about the OP's daughter and who is paying for what, so I'm not referring to that. But you asked for my opinion and here it is. If my child was not going to school, not working, and moved in with a boy/girlfriend because two of them claimed to be "adults," I would not be paying for their rent, food, gas, car insurance, etc. I know that legally I need to keep my child on my health insurance until age 26 (which is kind of insane in itself). But that would be about it.




No, you're NOT legally obligated to keep your child on your health insurance until age 26. You are legally "entitled" to keep them on your health insurance until age 26, that's a big difference. BTW, my DD does work, she was going to an interview for a better job.
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Old 06-16-2016, 10:17 PM
 
10,116 posts, read 19,437,605 times
Reputation: 17444
Quote:
Originally Posted by city living View Post
I don't think it's as big of a deal as some people are making it out to be. I'm sure she learned her lesson, though I think it was strange she started crying and being in a panic about it.

Once I dozed off and I woke up in a panic because I was supposed to be somewhere. Half-asleep, I threw a few things in a bag and took off to the city. I got there and realized I was $0.25 short of buying a ticket to a different train. Oops. I asked a stranger for a quarter. I guess my parents have failed me.

I'll be honest, I have been without cash before many times, much to the annoyance of my mother, but I almost always have an ATM/CC with me. If it were me, I would have just walked back out of the garage and gone to an ATM. Any reason why she doesn't have an ATM/CC?


People like to make "big deals" out of parenting, at least on this forum. Its some sort of nasty "competition". I am a target here, and have been over the years. Because my kids have made some bad choices, I am somehow to blame. She does have an ATM card, guess she just didn't have it with her that day? Why? The answer's obvious, I never taught her to always carry it Although I was the one who had her set up a bank account, direct deposit, ATM card, savings account, etc, guess I did something wrong there, too?


I've learned over the years she's not the only one who "disrespects" me. So do many "perfect parents" here on this board. I've learned once a person is labeled as a "bad parent" ---deserved or not---the label sticks. Why don't some of you stop and take a good look at yourselves before you go casting stones?
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Old 06-16-2016, 10:55 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
11,495 posts, read 26,917,791 times
Reputation: 28036
Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryleeII View Post
People like to make "big deals" out of parenting, at least on this forum. Its some sort of nasty "competition". I am a target here, and have been over the years. Because my kids have made some bad choices, I am somehow to blame. She does have an ATM card, guess she just didn't have it with her that day? Why? The answer's obvious, I never taught her to always carry it Although I was the one who had her set up a bank account, direct deposit, ATM card, savings account, etc, guess I did something wrong there, too?


I've learned over the years she's not the only one who "disrespects" me. So do many "perfect parents" here on this board. I've learned once a person is labeled as a "bad parent" ---deserved or not---the label sticks. Why don't some of you stop and take a good look at yourselves before you go casting stones?
You didn't do anything wrong as a parent. Your daughter didn't make a huge mistake either...it was a ten dollar mistake, easily fixed, and I'd bet she thanked her dad several times for coming by to help her out. He got to feel like she still needs him, she probably felt a bit silly but will never make the mistake again.


My husband and I were late to our own wedding because we didn't have any cash on us for parking It happens. After that, we always made sure to have a few dollars stashed in the glove compartment.
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