3 year old with food texture problems

[DubbleT]

My son is grown and still suffers from this. Mostly it's a matter of mixed textures that bother him, so stews and casseroles are generally out, as are condiments, gravies, etc. When he lived at home it became a matter of either cooking a meat and three type of meal, or if making something else leaving some portion of the main ingredients separate so he could eat them plain.
Keep trying though, you never know what will work and what won't. There are a handful of things my son eats that don't seem to bother him as much when things are mixed, pizza is one of them. Lasagna is another, although he hates spaghetti with sauce, go figure.

[nana053]

Food texture issues may involve sensory processing disorder. Read The Out-of-Sync Child by Carol Stock Kranowitz if you need to figure it out without a pediatrician or occupational therapist to help you.

Note that if you need to try a feeding program you can do at home, I have a very good friend who wrote out what she did with her son who is autistic. I can send it to you in doc form if you want to try it. It's a bit more complicated in the document I have.

Here are the steps in brief:

1) Careful introduction of one food at a time. Food was chosen to be as similar in texture, taste, and appearance as possible to other acceptable foods.

First, he would just tolerate the food being on his plate, then he would touch it with his finger, then touch it to his lips, then finally chew and swallow it. This was all with a very small piece of a single food.

2) Once her son trusted her not to be giving him *yucky* food, and he had been taking single foods she introduced, she could tell him that it was ok to try the food and he would do so. Taking only a small bite of the new food and she could skip the putting it on the plate, touching, licking and go right to chewing and swallowing.

3) Once step 2 was established, she began to have him try *one hamster sized* of everything on his plate.

This process took almost a year, but he is now eating like any other child.

[DeannaC]

I'm 45 and I still eat according to texture, which has resulted in me being anemic most of my life.

I'm glad you're seeing this as a problem (we either ate or went without, I went without) and are determined to help him overcome it. It sucks being cold all the time.

[hunterseat]

At 3? Wouldn't it be better to be glad he eats at all and feed him what he likes? There must be a way to provide nutritious choices without making a big deal over it.

[rrah]

I would suggest you also ask this question in the special needs parenting section. First, I'm not suggesting your son has special needs, but I'm sure many of the parents there have gone through eating problems. Until you can get him into a professional (and the OT idea was excellent) they may have some very good tips and suggestions for you.

[BirdieBelle]

I went around and around with this issue with one of my 17-year-old twins.

I mean, we tried everything from age 2 up to 6th grade. He had some expressive speech issues at age 2 and 3, but he also ate only a few foods, and I really let it stress me out. It caused problems when we would eat at relatives'' houses. The grandmas could not resist offering every food under the sun. We would have some strange combinations at Thanksgiving!

It affected his social life a little bit in elementary school when every birthday party had pizza, which most kids love but not mine! But he handled it. He just sat there and had fun without eating.

We saw speech therapists, two psychologists, a behavioral specialist, an OT, and everyone in between. When he turned 13, I even forced a local doctor, who is a nationally known expert on tween and teen eating disorders, to evaluate him. He was straight with me and said, "I don't see a disorder. Some people are picky."

I'm including all this just to say that a LOT of changes are taking place during the toddler years, and not everything is a diagnosable problem. Some stuff you both just have to get through.

One thing I KNOW does not work? Forcing his hand. Offer SOMETHING he likes at every meal. Every kids is not going to eat a food pyramid-worthy meal every time. Heck, most ADULTS don't do that!

Don't make a separate meal for him, but don't FORCE him to "eat it all or don't get up from the table." A lot of "picky eating problems" are really just problems with parent expectations. If my kid wanted to take a hamburger bun, juice box and cheese stick in his lunchbox, I finally learned to let him and then let him make up the difference when he came home. Sure, it didn't SEEM like a nutritionally balanced, bento-box type lunch. But it got him through the day until he could get home and eat something he really wanted.

The funny thing is that now he is the most adventurous eater in our family of 5. He loves spicy foods, sushi, raw oysters, etc. He won't eat ketchup or maple syrup. But he gets fed, takes a vitamin and is healthy.

My point is that this age is confusing for parents as kids develop motor skills, language skills and emotional expression. Take it slow and be as patient as you can.