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I've known that parent. I don't "deal " with them at all. Everyone gets to make choices on how they raise and treat their kids. What do I care? If a parent wants to brag on their kid endlessly and I'm stuck listening to them I let my eyes glaze over and think about something more pleasant.
No I'm aware of my sons skills I am pridefull of them and I compliment other children. Other parents should do this more.
I am aware many parents do this. And these are the nonselfish type.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77
Yes this is what I mean.
I'm confused. What you're saying above to me is not the same thing as what katiana is saying. One is about giving accolades to various other children. The other is about being mean. As stated, I don't hang with parents yet, but one thing I wasn't expecting was people I don't know complimenting my kid or having hopes that I would be doing the same. I'm surprised it's on your radar (as well as others in this thread). There must be more to it than that.
I'm confused. What you're saying above to me is not the same thing as what katiana is saying. One is about giving accolades to various other children. The other is about being mean. As stated, I don't hang with parents yet, but one thing I wasn't expecting was people I don't know complimenting my kid or having hopes that I would be doing the same. I'm surprised it's on your radar (as well as others in this thread). There must be more to it than that.
Your kid is too young for this stuff. However, it won't be long. It starts early.
I was talking about parents that only like their children. All the rest are odd in their eyes.
I thought it was clear in your post. I know parents who definitely think their child is better than all the others. And this was at 2 years old. Like, if someone complimented my son, they were either visibly annoyed or would add in "she did the same thing". I handled it by cutting way down on the amount of time I spent with them. I mostly only hang out with people that make me feel uplifted now. If I come away from an afternoon with parents who just make me feel drained I pull back.
Some of it is normal. I think that a whole lot of people think even while still in the hospital that their newborn seemed a little more special than all the other babies in the nursery. No matter if the infant screamed the very loudest, was the quietist -- whatever, or they'll think theirs looked a little better formed somehow.
Y'all are missing the OP's point -some people go beyond thinking their "special snowflake" is perfect, and extend that to being unable to accept that other kids might be better than theirs at something.
Fortunately, I've only encountered this type once. My son's 3rd-4th grade classmate had parents like that. Any time Johnny wasn't #1 in anything, we parents got to hear about the other kid being "lucky", "teacher's pet", "coach's kid", "must've cheated", "my kid let him win", etc. Ridiculous. Grown adults feeling the need to run down kids.
Eventually, the family moved away -in search of more playing time in a smaller, less-competitive district. But not without telling us how much our school sucked and how it wasn't good enough for their kids.
I love my son with all my heart and I think he's great, he's funny and kind and so loving, he's is only 2 though lol. Do I think he does no wrong? Lol hell no! I'm not oblivious to his little tantrums and naughty behaviour but that's what time out is for
I know that there will be other kids better than him at things but as long as he tries and does his best its more than good enough for me.
Your kid is too young for this stuff. However, it won't be long. It starts early.
If I run across anyone openly putting down kids I'll probably dismiss myself from their presence. I hope most of the parents that will be in my life will have some class and sense.
Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute
Some of it is normal. I think that a whole lot of people think even while still in the hospital that their newborn seemed a little more special than all the other babies in the nursery. No matter if the infant screamed the very loudest, was the quietist -- whatever, or they'll think theirs looked a little better formed somehow.
Why wouldn't you expect new parents not to think their baby is better than anything/one? This is the position I don't understand. When I was in the hospital I barely noticed other babies. I definitely did not gaze at any baby. What I was a bit surprised about was my experiences when I first held another baby. I've never been very maternal nor have I spent any significant time around children, but I thought once I became a mom that would translate as a general state of being. Not the case. I had a mommy date with a colleague who was pregnant at the same time as me, so our kids are about the same age. My colleague stepped into the other room and her son started to fuss in his seat, so I went over and picked him up. To my surprise I didn't like the smell of him. I didn't like the feel of him and I thought he was funny looking (looked like a bald old man). I didn't experience this mother nature mommy thing. It was nothing like holding and looking at my own baby. There wasn't the "all babies smell good" experience. It wasn't intentional on my part, obviously, it's just how it went. With that said, I do feel something special with my close friends' children, but they all happen to be girls. I wonder if that has anything to do with it. I suspect how we view our children (as special, unique snowflakes, which they all are really) is an evolutionary boon to ensure survival.
Y'all are missing the OP's point -some people go beyond thinking their "special snowflake" is perfect, and extend that to being unable to accept that other kids might be better than theirs at something.
Fortunately, I've only encountered this type once. My son's 3rd-4th grade classmate had parents like that. Any time Johnny wasn't #1 in anything, we parents got to hear about the other kid being "lucky", "teacher's pet", "coach's kid", "must've cheated", "my kid let him win", etc. Ridiculous. Grown adults feeling the need to run down kids.
Eventually, the family moved away -in search of more playing time in a smaller, less-competitive district. But not without telling us how much our school sucked and how it wasn't good enough for their kids.
We've encountered parents like that. I think in their cases it's more about the parents equating their own worth in the accomplishments of their child. They eventually pulled their child out of public school in favor of a tiny private school because our district wasn't good enough for their son. Meanwhile the year prior they couldn't talk about how wonderful the schools were! All of this started because their 1st grader wasn't chosen as the lead in a 10 minute play, especially when he was the "best" and the teacher didn't choose him because he's not the teacher's pet. I just have to wonder what their kid will be like in 20 years, when he hasn't learned how to handle rejection, and he grows up with the sincere belief that he's the best at EVERYTHING.
If I run across anyone openly putting down kids I'll probably dismiss myself from their presence. I hope most of the parents that will be in my life will have some class and sense.
Why wouldn't you expect new parents not to think their baby is better than anything/one? This is the position I don't understand. When I was in the hospital I barely noticed other babies. I definitely did not gaze at any baby. What I was a bit surprised about was my experiences when I first held another baby. I've never been very maternal nor have I spent any significant time around children, but I thought once I became a mom that would translate as a general state of being. Not the case. I had a mommy date with a colleague who was pregnant at the same time as me, so our kids are about the same age. My colleague stepped into the other room and her son started to fuss in his seat, so I went over and picked him up. To my surprise I didn't like the smell of him. I didn't like the feel of him and I thought he was funny looking (looked like a bald old man). I didn't experience this mother nature mommy thing. It was nothing like holding and looking at my own baby. There wasn't the "all babies smell good" experience. It wasn't intentional on my part, obviously, it's just how it went. With that said, I do feel something special with my close friends' children, but they all happen to be girls. I wonder if that has anything to do with it. I suspect how we view our children (as special, unique snowflakes, which they all are really) is an evolutionary boon to ensure survival.
Don't bet on it!
Surely you remember, just from being a kid yourself, the kids who could "do no wrong"?
As the kids get older and do stuff that ranges from "naughty" (the stereotypical stealing from the cookie jar) to really wrong (underage drinking for ex), there are parents who are sure some other kid was a "bad influence" and that their kid would never do anything like that on his/her own. The latter may be true in a sense, as "mob psychology" does kick in.
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