How do you deal with eye rolling and back talk? (infants, chores)
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My older child (8) has been getting very mouthy with me lately. He rolls his eyes, makes smart remarks, back talks and groans when I tell him to do something. How would you handle this?
Has he got a new best friend?
Sometimes I knew there was a new kid at school before I was told. The new best friend usually talked back, thought he was funny and chewed with his mouth open.
My little one has tried that, and I just turn, give her the evilest stare possible, and ask her, "What did you just say to me?" That's all it takes. She wouldn't dare repeat it, and straightens herself up immediately.
I remember my mom telling all of us when me smirked, made faces, rolled eyes, while shaking her finger at us, "you better wipe that smirk off your face before I do it for you." Worked every time.
My older child (8) has been getting very mouthy with me lately. He rolls his eyes, makes smart remarks, back talks and groans when I tell him to do something. How would you handle this?
Of course, he is a perfect angel at school!
I always try not to laugh because I remember doing the same thing myself and I know full well what they're thinking.
I remember my mom telling all of us when me smirked, made faces, rolled eyes, while shaking her finger at us, "you better wipe that smirk off your face before I do it for you." Worked every time.
Yes, that one works. I remember my dad saying something to that effect, he probably got it from his dad. My mom would usually curse us by saying she hoped someday we got children just like ourselves and so we did.
It's just funny how time flew - one minute you're the one sitting in the chair rolling your eyes, next thing you know you're the one having the eyes rolled at you.
Well I used the look and "I know you didn't just say that to me". He looked down and said, "Alright." LOL I'll continue with this for a bit and see if it works. I also told both kids for every backtalk or ignoring a direction they commit, I'd take a toy away from them.
My little one has tried that, and I just turn, give her the evilest stare possible, and ask her, "What did you just say to me?" That's all it takes. She wouldn't dare repeat it, and straightens herself up immediately.
Mine aren't old enough yet for too much sass but I know we'll get there. Oh goody!
I used to work with teens in therapy, so I was treated to plenty of verbal and nonverbal disrespect and used the "what did you just say to me?" or "the LOOK" along with rehearsing how to "try it again without the attitude/disrespect/insert specific behavior here." Most learned after a few sessions of repeating the same sentence over and over 50 times (with various feedback from me) how to self-monitor and actually say they disagreed or were angry instead of having it leak out through non-verbals. Heck, I know some adults who could use practice on that!! The best part is if they caught me saying something ineffective, they'd also say "let's try that again, shall we?"
ETA: good job, Magritte! Let us know how it is going!
ETA2: actually, I just realized I use this with my 3yo, too. He knows to ask for something he needs to say " may I have...please?" and there have been a few times that he'll scream it at the top of his lungs, all angry (which is usually a cue for me to bite my lip not to crack up, because it sounds really funny!) and I ask him to say it again in his nice voice. So far, we've had success with this.
Last edited by eastwesteastagain; 12-03-2011 at 08:19 AM..
Reason: Afterthought
Mine aren't old enough yet for too much sass but I know we'll get there. Oh goody!
You have a 3 year old? Get ready!
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The best part is if they caught me saying something ineffective, they'd also say "let's try that again, shall we?" 
