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The coach needs help running drills sometimes, so he can work with a smaller group of kids (soccer). At baseball, the dads often played catch with their kids to warm up, and also helped run drills. That particular season, no one even stepped up to be assistant coach, so DH was alone with all the kids, for almost every practice. On picture day, it was also helpful to have some parents to organize the and line up the kids. It also shows that you give a crap. My kids have been on teams with parents who obviously did not, and it showed.
Perhaps we just have different experiences with different types of sports teams. On the teams my kids have played on, if the coaches/league organizer knew they'd need more than one coach at practices, they would find an assistant(s) coach to help them- I had the same problem with no one willing to help me at practice for a U8 boys soccer team, so the league organizers pointed me towards high school school students who were interested in soccer-related volunteering. They got service hours plus valuable learning moments, and I got the help I needed. It was a win-win! Perhaps you could look into something like that if your husband is in that situation again.
My kids are 8 and 6 and one parent always stays at practice, and at least one parent goes to every game.
My husband coached a soccer team of 7 year olds and we were really surprised that a lot of the parents dropped off and left. It was completely different than baseball at the same age, where all of the parents stayed and most helped with practice.
With 6-8 year olds I'd want parents to stay at practice. Those kids can get emotional and have tantrums and be a handful. While that can occasionally happen with kids a bit older usually they can handle themselves more.
My only worries were if their kid were injured or bad weather came. Once a kid had an asthma attack after his parents left, but I called them on the cell phone and they came pretty quickly. With the bad weather either myself or another parent or coach usually drives the kid home or lets them wait in their car until the parent gets there.
By 9, 10 to 11, most parents don't stay at practice. At younger ages, it depends on the sport. For example, all parents stayed at baseball practice but no parents stayed for wrestling practice for elementary years. That's partly because there was nowhere for parents to be during wrestling practice.
Soccer is another one where parents stop staying at practice early on. Football for the younger years but not middle school years. Parents didn't stay for swimming practice. Lacrosse practice didn't have parents staying for practice until there became a power struggle within the organization. "Problem parents" started attending practice and eventually lacrosse banned parents from attending practice. Some other sports outright banned parents from being at practice too.
As someone mentioned, there comes a time where parents are embarassing to their children. By middle school, most parents are fully aware that it's time to back off and allow their children to have individual experiences independent of their parents. Too much parental involvement can become a bad thing at a point.
It's actually kind of sad for the player whose parent is a coach. I know this first hand since my husband coached for many of our children's sports. We were smart though. At a certain age, hubby quit coaching his own children's team and traded teams with another coach for a different age group. That way our children could enjoy the sport without having Dad constantly hovering over them as a coach.
Says the person so engrossed in someone's behavior he took her picture instead of watching the game.....
It took about three seconds to take that picture - a little different than reading what your friend's post about what her little boy Johnny had for breakfast that morning.
Facebook is to City-Data Forum what cartoons are to the Discovery Channel.
Perhaps we just have different experiences with different types of sports teams. On the teams my kids have played on, if the coaches/league organizer knew they'd need more than one coach at practices, they would find an assistant(s) coach to help them- I had the same problem with no one willing to help me at practice for a U8 boys soccer team, so the league organizers pointed me towards high school school students who were interested in soccer-related volunteering. They got service hours plus valuable learning moments, and I got the help I needed. It was a win-win! Perhaps you could look into something like that if your husband is in that situation again.
This is one of the reasons we left this league and joined another one. There was very little support from the people running the league, and very little support from the parents. We just had a bad experience. I think next time, my husband might refuse to coach without an assistant. I think they'd work to find him one if the alternative was having to refund money and pi$$ off a bunch of parents and disappoint a bunch of kids. He's coaching our other son's team this season, in the other league. So far it is better already. We'll see. Practices start this week.
It's actually kind of sad for the player whose parent is a coach. I know this first hand since my husband coached for many of our children's sports. We were smart though. At a certain age, hubby quit coaching his own children's team and traded teams with another coach for a different age group. That way our children could enjoy the sport without having Dad constantly hovering over them as a coach.
^^ That is a great idea and good on your hubby for doing that! Our youngest son almost didn't have a school soccer team because we didn't have a coach. Finally a dad came in from a different area and he's a great coach. The kids are having a really good time and a great experience. This guy has coached all different age groups and all different levels of soccer, he's just great. His wife and older son - who plays soccer for the university - also come to help him out. Love that.
Anyway - I always went to all practices and games for our kids because our kids wanted us there. Last year our oldest son let us know that he'd rather us not be there, that he wanted to do it on his own, so we respected that. He rides his bike everywhere he needs to go, or he takes the city bus, so he made it clear by saying "I can get myself there and back, you don't need to be there..." and once or twice I asked him if he was sure, and he said "yes" and so I got the message that he really just wanted to do this on his own.
But with our youngest son, just entering middle school and playing soccer for the first time (he was a swimmer and did other sports prior to this, this is our first experience ever with soccer), we were still planning on going to every practice and all because he seems to want us to be there still, but we just feel like the odd parents because it seems like all the other parents just drop and run. I didn't know if it was a soccer thing or the new way middle school parents handle sports or what? When our oldest son was in middle school he played basketball, and most of the parents were at every practice, so that's what I expected with soccer, too. But that's not the case I guess. Our son seems to want us there, but I don't want to baby him. I'm wondering if I should start to let him know that it's time he go to practices without us there every time. Younger son is a little more attached or clingy (maybe there's a better way to put that?) than his way more independent and often times aloof older brother. Hmmm...
I think, also, I might not really understand the difference between a "club" sport and a "school" sport. "Club" sports would be like YMCA, AYSO, Kid Sports? While "school" sports would be something set up through the school? This would mean that both my kids I guess have always played club sports, but the teams are organized by school and practice at neighborhood school fields. ?
As far as I know the public schools here don't offer sports until high school. At the elem. and middle school level you have to go through an outside agency like AYSO, Kid Sports, YMCA, or the city recreation department but even that is mainly for high school age and up (they call it city leagues).
As far as why parents would want to go to practices - because it's your kid. ? Watching them is part of the fun and enjoyment of being a parent. Also, in case something happens, or in case the weather changes (we're in Oregon - it totally happens) and they have to call practice off. Also - I bring snacks and drinks. (Probably why my kids want me there for as long as they do. lol)
I could never coach because unlike my kids - I hate sports. Maybe hate is too strong a word. I really don’t like them. They either bore or irritate me or both. The only time I watch sports is when my kids are out there practicing or playing. I'm a yogaphile. If they wanted to start a yoga something-or-other with their friends I could totally guide them along that path. But team/competitive sports just do not do it for me at all. I support my kids choices. We're totally different people with very different interests. But I'd make a rotten coach. lol
First child: Attend all games & practices. Join club. Become team manager or assistant coach. Buy meat, Sell burgers on game days. Encourage other parents to help. Set up fields. Buy new cameras. Video every game and take lots of photos.
Second Child: Watch some games & some practices. Cook burgers when asked.
Third child: Watch the occasional game. Drop kid at practice and collect afterwards. Do not get out car. Wash Jerseys and supply half time oranges when rostered on and reminded by team manager. Fourth child: It is not until halfway through the season that you are even aware that they are playing and still are not sure what sport it is. Watch one game per season. Hope their practice is on the same night as one of the other kids. Child gets lift home from practice and games. Buy a burger and talk enthusiastically to the parents who have only their first child in sport.
That cracked me up! I'm a fourth child. I'm lucky there is the one (and I mean one) baby picture! It's no wonder my mom was always forgetting to pick me up from school.....
That cracked me up! I'm a fourth child. I'm lucky there is the one (and I mean one) baby picture! It's no wonder my mom was always forgetting to pick me up from school.....
Sisterhood!
My name and birth weight is in my baby book. Nothing else.
Have a 10 year old boy and 7 year old boy both playing soccer for the past 4 years. I attend every practice (and stay the whole time) and attend every single game. Odd to me to think of leaving my kids in that type of setting at their ages.
I'm the 3rd child and my parents never attended anything!!
My name and birth weight is in my baby book. Nothing else.
(I can laugh about it now. Sometimes, lol.)
Me too!!
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