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You do realize there are plenty of single mothers out there who do a very good job raising their kids...right? Just throwing that out there.
And I realize that my kid won't "cure" me of depression. My depression is very genetic. I also said that I wasn't planning on trying to conceive now but until after I get my ducks in a row. That is why I want to know how much money should I have saved up before trying and what I need to do to prepare for a baby.
I also am getting myself mentally healthy by using medications and going to see a counselor. I am trying to make the right decisions for my baby.
And no, I don't plan on going on bc because bc doesn't cooperate well with my system.
Since you have decided not go go on birth control please use barrier contraception x2 (you and your partner), learn your fertility cycles along with how to recognize when you are ovulating, and avoid sex during that time. http://tcoyf.com/
You do realize there are plenty of single mothers out there who do a very good job raising their kids...right? Just throwing that out there.
And I realize that my kid won't "cure" me of depression. My depression is very genetic. I also said that I wasn't planning on trying to conceive now but until after I get my ducks in a row. That is why I want to know how much money should I have saved up before trying and what I need to do to prepare for a baby.
I also am getting myself mentally healthy by using medications and going to see a counselor. I am trying to make the right decisions for my baby.
And no, I don't plan on going on bc because bc doesn't cooperate well with my system.
So, are we to assume that there's a genetic component to your depression? If so, have you sat down with a mental health care professional to determine the probability of this? Are you saying you want to bring a child into this world with no consideration of this possibility? That's irresponsible.
Have you determined whether or not it's safe to be on these meds while pregnant? What about breastfeeding? If the meds are passed this way, you will have not choice but to pay for formula. Do you have any idea how much that costs?
And what the frak does "birth control not cooperating well with your system" mean? Do you think that the surge in hormones during pregnancy is going to cooperate with your system?
You are absolutely NOT trying to make the right decisions for this imaginary baby. You are simply making selfish decisions to fill the void in your own life. This is all about you!
Okay, I can understand MOST of what you are saying, but what is wrong with not having a partner in the picture? I'd prefer to be a single mom. In fact, nowadays, there are plenty of women out there raising kids on their own.
As for the PT job, I plan to work full-time and go to school PT when I have my baby. And as much as I would love to adopt a dog or a pet, I can't. Where I live, I can't have pets.
Do you have any conception what daycare will cost dear? No it's not wrong to not have a partner, but it is wrong to just have a baby because "i have major baby fever". You are not thinking anything about that child and everything about yourself. I would also go for the full B.S. in nursing and not stop at just becoming a CNA, because you will make around 3 x the salary to start with. I feel your depression is fueling this fantasy that having a baby now will make things a o.k. And let me tell you kids are not going to do that. It is a very very hard job being a parent with 2 of us, and will be 3 times as hard by just yourself.
Have a child when you are ready and physically able to give that child all the things they need in life. But don't have one just because you are feeling the urge.
I can't believe a sperm bank would accept you as a client, and insurance will not pay the bill either. You aren't infertile as far as you know, so even if you have infertility treatment insurance (rare) the bills will be very high even before a baby is conceived.
They might, but she would also have to pay for it and it's not cheap.
You really should watch 16 and Pregnant. I know those girls are younger but many of them have it all figured out. They will have the baby, finish school, start a career and all will be just fine.
Then they have the baby and they that the reality of the situation is far different than they had anticipated.
Okay, so let me first start off with this: I'm 19 years old. I graduated high school last year with honors. I am in my second year of college and I have a PT job and a saving's and checkings account w/over 2k. I plan on going to nursing school in the fall of 2011, and I don't plan on trying to conceive until after I am admitted and have a decent job as a CNA with my own apartment. I plan on having my own apartment, my CNA license and job by late 2011/early 2012. By then, I will only have two/three years left of college and be 20 years old.
I really have no passion in life other than wanting to be a mother. I have been depressed, but I am on medication. I have a yearning to be a mother, and I don't know how much longer I can wait. All I want now is to have a baby of my own. I know babies are hard work, but I am willing to put the effort into taking care of my baby. I don't have nor want a partner; I am willing to do this on my own (via sperm bank).
Is 20 too young to try to conceive? And are there some things I need before trying to have a baby? Also, how much money should I have saved up for a baby?
P.S. I have health/student insurance.
don't do it! No matter how much work you think a baby/child is, it will be more than you think. no matter how much you think a baby will cost, it will be more! $2000 is nothing (I mean, that's great for a 19 yo student, but nothing for a mom).
Having a child will not help your depression. It is likely to make it worse.
Please do not make the biggest mistake of your life by bring an innocent child into the world when you are clearly not ready. Have some common sense!
In my opinion this early in the game it is selfish to bring a child into the world on your desires. You are 19 years old. I can see if you were almost 35 or 40 but 19???? You have so much life to live why would you want to do this. One of my biggest wishes is to be a mother to, but how is it fair to the child to be raised without a father? IMO I would wait. Wait wait wait for a while. Get established in work, finish your school, travel, meet people....you will have to work alot more to support a child and that means less time spent with your child and more time for that child to be raised in daycare.
Okay, I can understand MOST of what you are saying, but what is wrong with not having a partner in the picture? I'd prefer to be a single mom. In fact, nowadays, there are plenty of women out there raising kids on their own.
As for the PT job, I plan to work full-time and go to school PT when I have my baby. And as much as I would love to adopt a dog or a pet, I can't. Where I live, I can't have pets.
I have two sisters that were single moms and their kids are now both 20 and it WAS HELL. Ask those kids if they wished there had been another adult presence in their life and they will tell you yes. I don't care that many are doing it, raising a child is a LOT of work. I have an eight year old and a solid marriage with a solid family income and sometime raising a child is overwhelming even to us.
I went to grad school when my son was a toddler and didn't work and it was a miserable experience. I feel like I missed a few critical years. He developed severe anxiety because of my lengthy absences.
When I was 19 I felt very grown up. Now that I am in my forties, I realize that knew so little back then. If you decide to have a baby right now you are likely to be an incompetent parent.
You seem to have a romanticized notion of what having a baby is like. I wish it were possible for you to go spend a week or two with a brand new baby - lack of sleep, total exhaustion, not having time to take a shower, incessant crying (the baby and YOU) and that would maybe give you some pause.
Have you even priced day cares for infants in your area? Do you have a budget worked out? Do you have any idea what having a kid will cost? Say you can't breastfeed for some reason, that adds at least $100 a month alone for formula.
I really hope your post is a joke just trying to get people riled up.
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