Elementary girl preventing a friend from playing with other girls and bossing her around

[aidxen]

Girl bullying.
So much harder than boy bullying.
So much harder to fix than boy bullying.
Maybe try to get to know the other kids mother?
Try a different scout group.
Try to orcistrate some other friends.
Sometimes it is nice for a kid to say "no I am not allowed to do that" so as far as the pony tail is concerned, you could tell her that she in fact not allowed to un do it.
I would not rule out changing schools so she can regain her confidence.

[no kudzu]

I think this is a perfect opportunity to teach the girl that nobody is a friend who makes you feel bad. Friends usually make us feel good. Also this child sounds easily manipulated for acceptance. I guess most kids are. But unless this girl learns early not to be manipulated by her friend, she will be at the mercy of unscruplous boys and men. She needs to learn early to stand up for herself.