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You remind me of my daughter, a beautiful woman who always struggled to see the beauty in herself. "I'm too fat", "I'm ugly", etc. - to me what became the typical comments of someone who was just not secure or comfortable in her own skin. But she eventually grew out of that stage and at least didn't have such a distorted view of herself.
I think it's common for woman to look down on themselves, and I blame society for that. It seems too many times woman are judged on their exterior first. Society forces woman to be insecure because it seems eyes are always on them. The old adage "Don't judge a book by it's cover" is so very true in life, meaning a person should be looked at from the inside out. It's personal preference as to what a man finds in exterior beauty.
In your case, from this one picture I feel you are a very nice looking woman who should deflect the energy away from worrying about your appearance. You are a beautiful as others have stated.
I think it's common for woman to look down on themselves, and I blame society for that. It seems too many times woman are judged on their exterior first. Society forces woman to be insecure because it seems eyes are always on them. The old adage "Don't judge a book by it's cover" is so very true in life, meaning a person should be looked at from the inside out. It's personal preference as to what a man finds in exterior beauty.
It's funny - I got into an argument with my hubby once over this. Our daughter went through the same basic phase - am I pretty?
Hubby told her she was beautiful - and I understand why, she's his girl and the apple of her eye. But I told him never to do that again.
"Beautiful" in the US is defined by tall, overly skinny women who are featured in glossy magazines. The pictures are of unrealistic women who are draped in tailored-to-their-body expensive clothes in perfect settings under exact lighting by professional photographers using expensive equipment. And then those photos are retouched with photoshop, editing out any flaws and color correcting for the right 'look'.
"Beautiful" is not attainable by anyone with those photos as the example. By telling our daughter she was 'beautiful' it sets the standard that she needs to look like those pictures - and every woman falls short (even the model without all those professional helpers!). This leads to all sorts of issues and actual disorders.
It takes some perspective and maturity to understand that the makeup or the clothes those pictures are selling isn't going to make you look like that picture. That sort of 'beauty' doesn't really exist.
I agree with the other posters. You are a classic beauty. Now move on, quit putting your picture on public media, and get on with making yourself the best "you" you can be.
I don't want you to spend another moment dwelling on how you look. Remember that being beautiful is not an accomplishment, but it will help make your journey through life easier.
...Hubby told her she was beautiful...But I told him never to do that again.
"Beautiful" in the US is defined by tall, overly skinny women who are featured in glossy magazines...
Sorry, but that was very insensitive of you. For your husband, "beautiful" is what he saw in his daughter - not some shallow definition you carry on your shoulder.
Sorry, but that was very insensitive of you. For your husband, "beautiful" is what he saw in his daughter - not some shallow definition you carry on your shoulder.
Nope, he understood my point.
Only a woman understands what it means to be a teen girl in our f'ed up culture. It's not shallow. When your daughter is asking if she is pretty she's already comparing herself to the cultural definition based on tv, movies and magazines. She needs to understand that she cannot compare herself to that definition because it is a lie. He needs to understand the power and influence and intimidation of trying to be 'beautiful'. Billion dollar makeup and clothing industries prey on girls and women to make them feel that they have to be supermodels or they are of a lesser value.
...Billion dollar makeup and clothing industries prey on girls and women to make them feel that they have to be supermodels or they are of a lesser value.
I don't buy any of that nonsense - it's just redirecting blame. A girl brought-up in a secure, loving, home has the ability, and support, to tackle the important issues she'll face in life. Not all girls are as shallow as you depict - some actually compete with peers on an intellectual level.
I don't buy any of that nonsense - it's just redirecting blame. A girl brought-up in a secure, loving, home has the ability, and support, to tackle the important issues she'll face in life. Not all girls are as shallow as you depict - some actually compete with peers on an intellectual level.
I agree! Mine was the first response to this young woman, so you already know how I feel. My husband and I raised 3 very competent, confident, capable, smart daughters who have gone out into the world and made us very proud. They are all 3 in leadership roles at high levels in their respective organizations. They are proud of themselves, of each other, and we are proud of them. Two are married, and one has a son.
Oh yeah.....they are all pretty. But that's the least important thing of all. My daughters were not influenced by fashion magazines, peer pressure to be beautiful, diet trends, etc. They focused on what really matters in life and set their sights on their goals.
I don't believe that young women who are adequately parented and given proper role models will succumb to the thinking that beauty is most important, and a rail-thin body is a must.
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