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So I got this "compliment" one day. I was at an aerobic class which was one I had attended a while months before then got busy, then went on a diet and lost 30 lbs and then went back to aerobics. During the leg kick exercises the instructor ran over to me and said, "Did you just lose a bunch of weight?" I nodded and told her about the 30 lbs. "You look great," she said. "You used to look horrible but now you look great!" I didn't know whether to laugh or cry but decided to laugh.
Anybody else have such a strange compliment? Oh, a friend at work likes to joke and say, "I don't care what everybody else says--you're alright by me!"
So I got this "compliment" one day. I was at an aerobic class which was one I had attended a while months before then got busy, then went on a diet and lost 30 lbs and then went back to aerobics. During the leg kick exercises the instructor ran over to me and said, "Did you just lose a bunch of weight?" I nodded and told her about the 30 lbs. "You look great," she said. "You used to look horrible but now you look great!" I didn't know whether to laugh or cry but decided to laugh.
Anybody else have such a strange compliment? Oh, a friend at work likes to joke and say, "I don't care what everybody else says--you're alright by me!"
Isn't it nice to get those backhanded compliments. While you tried to laugh it off, I certainly wouldn't go back there, why patronize a place with people like that working there. You could have said...Perhaps to you I did look horrible but weight loss fixed that. Your problems run much deeper, you might consider long term therapy or a personality transplant. Congrats on sticking with your diet.
A favourite of my wife's from a film. Girl walks into a party. Host walks over and says
"oh, you've got your blue dress on, I never get tired of seeing it"!!!
So I got this "compliment" one day. I was at an aerobic class which was one I had attended a while months before then got busy, then went on a diet and lost 30 lbs and then went back to aerobics. During the leg kick exercises the instructor ran over to me and said, "Did you just lose a bunch of weight?" I nodded and told her about the 30 lbs. "You look great," she said. "You used to look horrible but now you look great!" I didn't know whether to laugh or cry but decided to laugh.
Anybody else have such a strange compliment? Oh, a friend at work likes to joke and say, "I don't care what everybody else says--you're alright by me!"
I agree with the poster who said the remark was passive-aggressive. Either that, or the person giving you the so-called compliment is really ignorant and has no social skills. It was best for you to laugh it off, but I can imagine how deeply it hurt for her to say you looked horrible before.
Big congratulations on your weight loss. It's a fantastic accomplishment, stepka!
Sometimes it's passive aggressiveness, and sometimes it's prejudice unbeknownst to the speaker themselves. I've gotten so many backhanded compliments from people it's not even funny. Things like "Oh my God you read so fast" (for reading braille--really why would it be any different from print?) and "wow you walk so fast" (for a blind person). In those cases I don't think it's intentionally hurtful but people don't realize they are operating by a set of assumptions that are just wrong and obnoxious.
Sorry to hear about that compliment Stepka. Once my mom made a compliment like that to Hillary Clinton! "Wow you lost so much weight--you used to be so overweight!" I just about wanted to die, lol.
What can you do with those compliments? Most of the time I try to give the person the benefit of the doubt. If it's really obvious in their tone of voice that they're just trying to take a jab at me then I don't. In that case I just act stupid and pretend to take it as a genuine compliment so they never get their satisfaction of knowing they got to me.
This guy told me he wanted to bite my backside...I wasn't too flattered
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I didn't know whether to laugh or cry but decided to laugh. 
