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1.) Nothing hurts more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
2.) I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
3.) There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
4.) How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
5.) I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than make two trips to bring my groceries in.
6.) MapQuest REALLY needs to start their directions at #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
7.) Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
8.) I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
9.) Bad decisions make good stories.
10.) You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
11.) I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
12.) I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?!!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away??
13.) I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day.
15..) I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Bud Lite than Kay.
Bonus Funny:
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, government, health care, real estate prices, the stock market, the federal deficit, Iraq, Afghanistan, global warming, BP’s spill, my savings, Social Security, credit card debt......I called the Suicide Hotline.......I got a call center in Pakistan.......told them I was suicidal. They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
That number 13 is funny, and reminds me of something that happened to me once. It was back during election time. Not this last election but 2 years before. I did clean my house some that day, but I was not dressed up at all. There's a knock on the door, and it's the state representative. He is out getting votes, and talking to people. Well my house looked alright but I didn't look like much since I'd been cleaning most of the day.
1.) Nothing hurts more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3.) There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
4.) How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
5.) I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than make two trips to bring my groceries in.
10.) You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
11.) I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
12.) I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?!!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away??
15..) I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Bud Lite than Kay.lmao
Bonus Funny:
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, government, health care, real estate prices, the stock market, the federal deficit, Iraq, Afghanistan, global warming, BP’s spill, my savings, Social Security, credit card debt......I called the Suicide Hotline.......I got a call center in Pakistan.......told them I was suicidal. They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
10.) You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
Hey! Wasn't the other day "National Recess at Work Day"???
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