Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Location: Prescott Valley, Az (unfortunately still here)
2,543 posts, read 4,896,184 times
Reputation: 1521
Advertisements
Quote:
Originally Posted by cncracer
Hmmm,I am not so sure about that. At some point most male/female relationship will shift to something sexual. The problem with this is to remain the same limits the friendship and changing seems to put deadlines on the next step in the friendship. I wonder if your friend had expectations you did not, and thus let the relationship drift apart.
[SIZE=3] [/SIZE]
Well, obviously you don't know me or anything about me. NO, it was never sexual. He was VERY, Very Christian and was just a friend. Nothing more. That's it. I have lots of male friends and none of it turned sexual. I'm a classy lady like that. I just don't "fall" for any kind of men. These are just people I hangout with and nothing more. I never go over to their house and they never come to mine either. Yes, it's possible. It's called CONTROL, which most folks (male or female) don't freakin' have. Thanks.
Well, obviously you don't know me or anything about me. NO, it was never sexual. He was VERY, Very Christian and was just a friend. Nothing more. That's it. I have lots of male friends and none of it turned sexual. I'm a classy lady like that. I just don't "fall" for any kind of men. These are just people I hangout with and nothing more. I never go over to their house and they never come to mine either. Yes, it's possible. It's called CONTROL, which most folks (male or female) don't freakin' have. Thanks.
Taking you at your word, you are only half of this relationship. He has not done anything improper. Maybe in his mind the best way to keep it that way is to remove himself. Remember men have to think with 2 heads.
Not sure if I'm correct but about a week ago I read one of your posts and it indicated you're real happy with your husband, is he okay with you hanging out with other guys? Some spouses don't have a problem with that but I'm just curious, has your friend ever met your husband? Maybe something that may have been said between the two? Again I don't know but maybe he feels uncomfortable around your husband?
To me a friend is:
-someone who I share common interests with
- able to confide in
- we learn things from one another
- we have fun together
Most of my friends I have known since elementary school so I'm extremely comfortable around them. I'm a girly girl so most of my friends are female. I definitely do agree that there can be a non sexual friendship between a male and a female though.
I think that he could have let you down a little more understanding than the way that he did.
So, he`s getting married? That should not come between the two of you remaining friends. Thats a shame. Sorry about that. We live and we learn. then move on.
Just out of curiosity, but what do you all consider a friend?
To me, a friend is someone who:
1. Comes over a lot (or at least once a week or so).
2. Is always there if you need them.
3. Calls you at least 1 or 2 times a week (or more).
4. Loves doing the same things you do.
5. Will never leave you, even if something in their life changed.
Well, I thought I had a friend (I won't mention his name). We met back in 2008 and I thought for sure he would be a great friend to be around with. We went bowling, ate out, and that's about it. He's a great Christian guy, but something recently changed on him and he never wants to see me again, he told me in the last few hours recently.
So, now I have problems hanging out with Christian people anymore (I don't know what I believe in anymore). But obviously, he's another one of those "backstabbing" Christians that I have experienced before and seen on T.V. also. So, I let him go and I hope I never hear from him again.
So, I have a problem trusting people anymore. So, I don't know what to consider a friend or just an acquaintance anymore. Give me some advice...Thanks... What do you consider a friend?
1. Comes over a lot (or at least once a week or so). No, most of my friends don't live near me, seeing each other every couple years or so is about all I can hope for.
2. Is always there if you need them. Absolutely
3. Calls you at least 1 or 2 times a week (or more). Not really, depends on what's going on in their life. Once a week is good, but once a month can be OK too.
4. Loves doing the same things you do. It's a bonus, but not necessary.
5. Will never leave you, even if something in their life changed. Definitely
I'm going through a very similar situation, although in my case it was an ex-boyfriend (dated three years ago) who recently got it into his head that my "feelings" for him were preventing me from moving on and finding someone new so he cut off all contact with me and won't listen to reason.
For the record, I am NOT interested in him romantically - he misinterpreted something I did and blew it all out of proportion. But anyway, I thought he was a good friend and instead of being able to discuss his point of view like a rational adult, he chose the childish/hurtful silent treatment to get his point across. It took two weeks of me e-mailing before he finally e-mailed back that our friendship was over because I was still hung up on him
After struggling with this for almost three weeks I'm finally reaching the point of accepting his decision (not that I have a choice in the matter) and leaving him in the past. It hurts like hell, but if I don't move on from this it will just end up hurting me more.
Your "friend" isn't really a friend if he could do this to you.
I'm sorry this happened. As time goes by, as you become older you will find that friends come and go though out your life. Very few will be "life long" friends. Even long term friendships will change over time. As time goes by, you change, your friend will change - your lives & loves will change, your priorties, jobs, family, and interests will change. Some friendships will stick, some won't. Some friends you will have a hard time seeing go - other you'll be happy to be rid of. In some cases, you'll be hurt. The important thing is to remember the good times and positive aspect of each friend who came into your life. Friendships that didn't work out can be a good lesson. Learn something positive from each one - it will make you a stronger and happier person.
It's life.
Best wishes.
A friend is someone that you can have zero communication with for over a year, and then when you see them again, it's like you both never spent more than a second apart.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I am not so sure about that. At some point most male/female relationship will shift to something sexual. The problem with this is to remain the same limits the friendship and changing seems to put deadlines on the next step in the friendship. I wonder if your friend had expectations you did not, and thus let the relationship drift apart.
so he cut off all contact with me and won't listen to reason. 
