Thank you all for your insights. All resolved (for now). It is the kind of relationship where it is ok to go for a coffee (if both parties feel like it) or just ask for help (I would not hesitate to do the same and I would expect her to say yes if I knew it was easy for her to do). It was just the sugar coating bit I was so uncomfortable about and was looking for some benchmarking from the crowd, which helped.
We are probably in different places at the moment with this girl, and it is ok, unfortunately I feel that if we (she) continues not nurturing the relationship we had, it will die at some stage (which is sad and I would like to properly catch up with her but do not at the cost of pushing things beyond natural). For now it is fine as it is, as long as we do not fake anything we still have open doors to one another. (yes, she offered to pay us a meal for his time, they have known each other for years, he had no problem to give her a hand - did not really care)
Funny story with the 'husband delivering a package to a friend'
It totally can happen, in our case, I did not even thing about that, absolute sure nothing would happen there even if I was not present.
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