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Is it appropriate to ask friends/acquaintances work related questions when you see them in social settings or when they are carrying on personal business like grocery shopping, errands, etc? For example, if you see your doctor in the grocery store would you ask him/her questions about a medical problem or complain about their office workers? If you know a plumber and see him at a neighborhood party, do you feel free to ask plumbing questions? If you know a police officer and see him/her in line at the DMV, do you feel that it is OK to bend his/her ear the entire time about problems you have with your local police department?
I've always felt like this is off limits unless you are close personal friends or maybe having a dire emergency where you need help. People have a right to personal time away from work, and they probably don't want to talk about work all the time.
I have a unique job where I administer adult recreational sports leagues. I play in the leagues myself, which is how I got involved and got the job. It's a great job in many ways, but my job is ALL people talk to me about. I'm never greeted with "Hi Jakealope, how are you?" Instead people yell at me across parking lots or whatever and say "Hey, got a question for you!" They have no problem bending my ear for 1/2 an hour at a time while I'm walking to my car with a cart of groceries. When I go to parties I spend the whole time answering league related questions or listening to stories about some incident that happened and what should they have done in that situation and what is the rule about that? I ran into an acquaintance at the DMV one time and he bent my ear and complained about everything in the league for a solid hour while we waited our turn. I had been looking forward to reading on my Kindle while I waited in the DMV.
I try to be a nice person and I don't mind it to a degree, but I find people very invasive and rude. I drop hints like "You know I don't have my work hat on right now. Could you send me an email and I'll check it out when I get to my computer." Or if they text me at 10PM on a Friday and then complain that I didn't get right back to them I'll say "You know, I don't work 24/7 and I don't have a call center to handle my calls, ha ha!" But people just don't get it. Are most people just oblivious? Or are expectations that everyone works 24/7?
maybe since you work in an area that is considered "fun" or "recreational" they don't get that it's not a 24/7 job for YOU!
I don't know the answer unless you can be assertive enough to stop someone and say "would you mind holding your questions and comments until we meet for games"
or something similar. Some will be glad to do so, others won't ever get it.....
I imagine a pastor or an animal vet etc. get questions or comments in the bank, or at a restaurant.
When my husband was a trial attorney, he would just hand them his business card and say "Call me at the office. I usually get in at 8 AM".
You should just tell them. "I get into work at 4 PM" or "We can talk before Thursday's game." You may have to be firm, but set your boundaries.
That is ridiculous that people complain that you do not get back to them fast enough during your off time. Perhaps, get a separate work email and have an automatic "Out of the office. Messages will read and returned the next business day."
That's annoying. I work with kids in both the education and psychology field and I get asked work questions all the time in my free time, too. I love kids. I work with kids all day long. I have my own kids at home. I don't want to talk about them in my free time, too.
You need to make some friends NOT in the league. That helps! I agree with drawing a firm line with your work hours. A nice, friendly, "hey, that sounds like a work question- email me" and then change the subject immediately or walk away or whatever. Just continue to be consistently firm. It's too bad these people have your phone number to text. I use a google number for my work and I have it automatically set to go to voicemail (where I tell them to email me instead). An out of office reply is a great idea. I use one of those, too!
I've always felt like this is off limits unless you are close personal friends or maybe having a dire emergency where you need help. People have a right to personal time away from work, and they probably don't want to talk about work all the time.
I feel the same way. If you're personal friends it's fine because it's a mutually beneficial relationship--you help them with whatever types of knowledge or skills you have (from your job or otherwise) and they'll do the same.
If a stranger or mere acquaintance is asking for help, then it's intrusive to bother someone on their off time, and it's obnoxious for anyone to expect to get advice/answers for free when it's something they'd normally pay for.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jakealope
I try to be a nice person and I don't mind it to a degree, but I find people very invasive and rude. I drop hints like "You know I don't have my work hat on right now. Could you send me an email and I'll check it out when I get to my computer." Or if they text me at 10PM on a Friday and then complain that I didn't get right back to them I'll say "You know, I don't work 24/7 and I don't have a call center to handle my calls, ha ha!" But people just don't get it. Are most people just oblivious? Or are expectations that everyone works 24/7?
Your "hints" seem pretty blunt. :/ That's super frustrating.
I don't think these people are oblivious, they just feel entitled to your time or think they should be the exception.
I had vaguely similar issues at a previous job. People from another department would call as I was leaving for the day. I'd answer to make sure it wasn't an emergency, and then I'd explain that my shift had ended, I'd already logged off all the programs and shut my computer down, and if they e-mailed me the details and documentation for their problem I would take care of it first thing in the morning. The response was always, "Oh, that's okay, this will only take a minute." For some reason people think it's okay to take up your time as long as it'll "only take a minute." It never took only a minute to help them (just getting the computer on and all the programs started took several minutes itself), and I didn't get paid for the extra time, so I just stopped answering the phone at the end of the day.
For the 10PM texts: If it's a personal phone, could you just block them? If it's a work phone, can you just turn it off when you leave work?
You just need to be more firm in your response and state the same thing each time, you are off duty but when you get in the office you’ll read their email.
Nope!.im glad when folks call upon my skills when out and about. Its refreshing to be relied upon.
I did though cringe when my boss was at an evening ball game and was schmoozing my friends ...to try to get an apptment to sell them something their business did not need. I told them if he did that to say, sorry! (Insert our biggest competitors name), we love our rep and he is actually two bleachers over and gave us these ballgame tickets.😄.
If i am having a seizure i am sure my doctor wouldnt hand me his business card or call 911 ...he'd step up and tend to my concern. Some folks use their skill even when off the clock...
I get asked to read medical reports,perform first aid,reccomend scalp treatments,it is overwhelming.
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