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I met a friend at the gym. He told me he was a personal trainer who works there and offered his services. I told him I couldn’t afford him. He got my number anyway in case I changed my mind. We got really close and became pretty good friends.
But we got too close. We started working out together and I would share my workouts with him and he would teach me things. He asked me to hang out outside of the gym and we did. The last time we hung out, we fell asleep together in bed but nothing happened.
Since then he’s been incredibly distant. The only time he would talk to me would be to sell his services, getting really pushy. It’s starting to make me feel bad because I still can’t afford him. I don’t want him to think I used him or anything. He did give me a lot of useful info but he initiated it. And I tried to help him too. I thought we were friends…. I really appreciated being around him but I’m starting to feel like he got close to me to try and get me hooked to him so I could hire him. That or he’s trying to keep the personal part separate with me. Either way I still can’t afford him and in the end, I have to choose myself. I had to resort to avoiding him and ignoring his texts. I feel bad and it’s my fault for getting close to a personal trainer, but the fact still remains, I just can’t afford him. I don’t know what he wants me to do.
Sounds like maybe he realized that he crossed a professional boundary and backed off. Don't over think this. Further, if you value this person's friendship, just talk to him about it. So what if you can't afford his services, that's not to say you can't be friends.
Sounds like maybe he realized that he crossed a professional boundary and backed off. Don't over think this. Further, if you value this person's friendship, just talk to him about it. So what if you can't afford his services, that's not to say you can't be friends.
That makes more sense because the only thing he would talk to me about after that was training with him. He stopped asking me personal questions. I don't know why he's so pushy right now though. He knows I'm still broke but he was starting to get aggressive.
Yes, I am well aware that he probably wanted to *bang* me. He didn't make a move the entire night though. Why would he wait for me to make a move? Maybe so he could dip out on me and say it was what I wanted so he wouldn't have to take responsibility?
Maybe he does feel used and feels the need to get something out of me… and when he knew I wasn’t going to bang him, now he’s trying to get money out of me…
Last edited by Gabriella Geramia; 05-16-2017 at 07:14 PM..
That makes more sense because the only thing he would talk to me about after that was training with him. He stopped asking me personal questions. I don't know why he's so pushy right now though. He knows I'm still broke but he was starting to get aggressive.
Yes, I am well aware that he probably wanted to *bang* me. He didn't make a move the entire night though. Why would he wait for me to make a move? Maybe so he could dip out on me and say it was what I wanted so he wouldn't have to take responsibility?
Maybe he does feel used and feels the need to get something out of me… and when he knew I wasn’t going to bang him, now he’s trying to get money out of me…
why didn't he make the move?
if you made the first move and it goes south as things usually do..... it was YOU that initiated it
that's how he keeps his conscience clear
if he initiated he risks you yelling at him.. and also telling others
when women initiate.... less of a chance you will say anything
That makes more sense because the only thing he would talk to me about after that was training with him. He stopped asking me personal questions. I don't know why he's so pushy right now though. He knows I'm still broke but he was starting to get aggressive.
Yes, I am well aware that he probably wanted to *bang* me. He didn't make a move the entire night though. Why would he wait for me to make a move? Maybe so he could dip out on me and say it was what I wanted so he wouldn't have to take responsibility?
Maybe he does feel used and feels the need to get something out of me… and when he knew I wasn’t going to bang him, now he’s trying to get money out of me…
If he feels used and has the need to get something out of this, then this connection ( professional or personal) isn't worth it. You can be honest with your feelings, in that you enjoyed being with him...but if he's totally being weird or ignoring you after talking to him, then you did your best and he's got a problem, not you. At that point I would back away from him completely. That conversation will be very telling in how he reacts to you.
1. He wants to bang you. You don't realize this, apparently.
2. You were honest about not being able to afford his services.
3. He helped you anyway, most likely thinking you'd bang him out of gratitude.
4. You slept with him, but didn't bang him.
5. He gave up on banging you, and now is keeping his distance.
He wants sex and he wants $. You denied him the $ for training, then the sex, so now he's back to selling the training.
If you find him attractive maybe you should just pay him for sex and kill two birds with one stone? j/k of course
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I agree
