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How long ago was the stroke? It is typical for stroke survivors to plateau before improving once again - so recovery can be viewed as a series of wide steps. Continuing speech exercises would help with retention.
Stroke damage to speech can cover so much: receptive speech as well as spoken speech, ability to read and/or write, swallowing, word formation, word retrieval, weakness of facial and throat muscles, making it hard to form words, and so on. Oddly, the ability to sing is lodged on the right side of the brain, while the majority of speech centers are in the left side of the brain, so often stroke survivors who are otherwise unable to communicate can still sing, something very valuable for communication.
It sounds as if your friend can form words clearly but has trouble with word retrieval. As she continues to recover, you may find that she substitutes similar words for the one she is seeking - and similar can include rhyming words or names of things with similar functions or words which look somewhat alike when written: "tablecloth" for "curtain", "pickle" for "fiddle", "gypsies" for "glasses" and so on (these are all actual examples from my late parent, following a very severe stroke). Usually grammar is untouched with this sort of aphasia, and pronunciation is adequate.
Such confusion can also affect sentences - when my parent was in a rehab facility, they asked me to "drive down the driveway" as I was about to leave, when they wanted me to crank down their hospital bed. The connection went back to their childhood and the Model T. Similarly, I was asked to "Pull up the tablecloth" instead of "Pull the curtain", but a gesture clarified the request. Time helps with these things.
Singing helps strengthen muscles and pronunciation - even hearing music is helpful - and there are specific exercises which will hasten the return of speech and communication. When the stroke survivor is tired or stressed, communication will become more difficult for them.
I wonder how long your friend received speech therapy - early visits would be primarily to assess her abilities and deficits, and that can be tiresome. Later visits focus on those particular needs and teach coping techniques - particularly important with eating and drinking.
So what can you do from a distance? Continue to call and write your friend. Send her CDs of whatever music she enjoys. Send her books or other reading matter. Encourage her. You can tell her that a friend (that's me) who was the primary caregiver of an older parent who suffered a stroke much worse than hers told you that speech usually improves rapidly at first, then slows down, but therapy can keep things on track and speed up recovery.
My parent retained receptive speech, with some small deficits, but had totally garbled speech initially, except for singing - yet one month after the stroke, speech was almost completely clear and well-formed sentences of 17 words were being spoken, though word retrieval was still a problem at times. Communication continued to improve, although swallowing was a permanent difficulty and required a special pureed diet and thickened drinks. I hope your friend's ability to swallow was unaffected, as this can be a potentially life-threatening condition, far worse than mild communication problems.
Encourage your friend, but respect her decision. If she is under 80, her recovery is likely to be better than if she is older. If she is younger, she is likely to continue to improve, though more slowly than if she was diligent about therapy and exercises.
Good luck to your friend and to you. She is fortunate to have someone so caring in her corner.
The OP was NOT asking whether she should tell her friend what to do. She said she knows that doesn't work. What she was asking was this:
Quote:
But she's had a stroke - maybe she needs encouragement?
Jeez, do you all read posts and actually think before you reply to them?
To the OP: in spite of what some of the posters in this thread have said, there's nothing wrong with giving a friend encouragement. CraigCreek pretty much said it all.
My friend who had the stroke--
it has affected her speech.
And she tells me that she doesn't want to do speech therapy. Apparently they have been at her house, and want her to spend 15 minutes a day with these exercises - I don't know what they are.
So she tells me she's not going to do it.
And I have to stop myself - I want to say - but you must do it, so you can get your speech back.
But surely she knows that, right? Surely the speech therapist tells her how important it is, and her doctor.
I spent so many years telling people what they should do --
you should stop smoking, you should exercise, blah blah
and finally I realized it was not my place to tell anyone what to do, and anyway everyone knows these basic tenets of health.
So now I keep my mouth shut.
But she's had a stroke - maybe she needs encouragement?
I wonder if I am being heartless by not saying anything.
If she's had a stroke part of her brain died.
the chances are excellent she will have anther one and die from it.
So with a fatal illness and a dying brain, and a so called friend lecturing her on What She SHOULD do - come on OP seriously? are you THAT unempathetic?
Stroke victims often suffer from depression as a result of the injury. They have had a life changing event.
Also, the mountain of recovery she has to climb may seem daunting - near impossible at times. So keep encouraging her, even if it's just baby steps.
Someone close to me had a stroke years ago. He could not speak, and in fact, could only wiggle one finger on one hand. Slowly, very slowly, through therapy, speech and movement returned. Soon he could sit. Then he could stand. Soon he could walk a few steps while holding onto a walker. Now, years later, he walks with no cane, drives, talks very well, etc. He did do his therapy as prescribed.
thank you for sharing this!
I am always looking for stories like this to share with my friend.
They make her happy.
Yes, she told me not to, so I don't.
I wait and I am very patient.
Quote:
Originally Posted by GiGi603
Do not do this.
It is called Speech Aphasia. My son had a stroke when he was five and it effected his speech. At first he had no word retrieval, but in time things in his brain reconnected. If he was, on a scale to 0-10, a zero when he came home, one year later he was at a 7 and has stayed there, he is in his mid 20's now.
Yes, speech therapy helped him tremendously with strategies. It is not stuttering, it is a problem with the brain finding the next word. You know that feeling when you can't think of the word? Well for some stroke victims it just happens more frequently.
Do not help her with the word---that is not good at all. My son was given hand signals to let us know what was happening. Three fingers would mean "stop, give me time", two fingers would mean, "help". He does not use those hand signals anymore but they helped us help him in the beginning.
Just leave her alone and let her guide you. It is frustrating for her. In time she may decide to go to Speech Therapy. My son's speech was horrible at first, in time it improved (a year or so) and now 20 years later he still struggles at times, other times he is fine.
Her brain is like a jumbled traffic jam when she speaks. You have to allow her to slow down and let the traffic flow better. "Merging" in when she is talking (giving her the word) is more frustrating for her when you do that.
Human nature wants to natural help someone but don't do it in this case.
The OP was NOT asking whether she should tell her friend what to do. She said she knows that doesn't work. What she was asking was this:
Jeez, do you all read posts and actually think before you reply to them?
To the OP: in spite of what some of the posters in this thread have said, there's nothing wrong with giving a friend encouragement. CraigCreek pretty much said it all.
The OP has a history of telling people what to do. The stroke victim knew the OP for years and knows that about her.
You can encourage a person when they are doing something. Encouraging a person who is not doing what you think they should be doing is telling them what to do.
The stroke was about a month ago.
She has word retrieval issues.
When she emailed me to ask where was the CD for stroke rehab with meditation, she said, "where was the wire?" but I knew what she was talking about.
do you have any experience with meditation and stroke recovery?
she gets really flummoxed around days of the week, and numbers.
I guess it has to do with the exact spot where the stroke hit.
(actually she told me she had two strokes)
so for ex when she was telling me she was going home on Wed. (from the hospital - this was a couple of weeks ago).
She said very plainly, "They tell me I"m going home on Wed."
And then she got very confused/anxious, - I guess about whether she had the day right. (which she did).
And started reciting the days of the week, and stopping, and saying oh that's not right, and then reciting them again, and finally: "Oh, forget it."
also numbers make her very anxious.
it's really interesting the examples you cited. Makes sense in a way. reminds me of sometimes I can't think of a word, like I wanted to add 'wheat grass' to shopping list. I couldn't bring the words to mind, altho i knew what it was. so I wrote 'green stuff'; I knew when I read green stuff it would come to me.
My friend just turned 70 a few months before the stroke. As long as I've known her (one year) she has been VERY stressed about...
just about anything- her son, her daughter, her friends, her doctors, her health..
selling her house, cleaning her house.
She was taking pills for high blood pressure, xanax for anxiety and drinking wine.
I will share your good words with her and I know it will encourage her.
I am so very grateful to you for taking the time to share.
ellen
Quote:
Originally Posted by CraigCreek
How long ago was the stroke? It is typical for stroke survivors to plateau before improving once again - so recovery can be viewed as a series of wide steps. Continuing speech exercises would help with retention.
Stroke damage to speech can cover so much: receptive speech as well as spoken speech, ability to read and/or write, swallowing, word formation, word retrieval, weakness of facial and throat muscles, making it hard to form words, and so on. Oddly, the ability to sing is lodged on the right side of the brain, while the majority of speech centers are in the left side of the brain, so often stroke survivors who are otherwise unable to communicate can still sing, something very valuable for communication.
It sounds as if your friend can form words clearly but has trouble with word retrieval. As she continues to recover, you may find that she substitutes similar words for the one she is seeking - and similar can include rhyming words or names of things with similar functions or words which look somewhat alike when written: "tablecloth" for "curtain", "pickle" for "fiddle", "gypsies" for "glasses" and so on (these are all actual examples from my late parent, following a very severe stroke). Usually grammar is untouched with this sort of aphasia, and pronunciation is adequate.
Such confusion can also affect sentences - when my parent was in a rehab facility, they asked me to "drive down the driveway" as I was about to leave, when they wanted me to crank down their hospital bed. The connection went back to their childhood and the Model T. Similarly, I was asked to "Pull up the tablecloth" instead of "Pull the curtain", but a gesture clarified the request. Time helps with these things.
Singing helps strengthen muscles and pronunciation - even hearing music is helpful - and there are specific exercises which will hasten the return of speech and communication. When the stroke survivor is tired or stressed, communication will become more difficult for them.
I wonder how long your friend received speech therapy - early visits would be primarily to assess her abilities and deficits, and that can be tiresome. Later visits focus on those particular needs and teach coping techniques - particularly important with eating and drinking.
So what can you do from a distance? Continue to call and write your friend. Send her CDs of whatever music she enjoys. Send her books or other reading matter. Encourage her. You can tell her that a friend (that's me) who was the primary caregiver of an older parent who suffered a stroke much worse than hers told you that speech usually improves rapidly at first, then slows down, but therapy can keep things on track and speed up recovery.
My parent retained receptive speech, with some small deficits, but had totally garbled speech initially, except for singing - yet one month after the stroke, speech was almost completely clear and well-formed sentences of 17 words were being spoken, though word retrieval was still a problem at times. Communication continued to improve, although swallowing was a permanent difficulty and required a special pureed diet and thickened drinks. I hope your friend's ability to swallow was unaffected, as this can be a potentially life-threatening condition, far worse than mild communication problems.
Encourage your friend, but respect her decision. If she is under 80, her recovery is likely to be better than if she is older. If she is younger, she is likely to continue to improve, though more slowly than if she was diligent about therapy and exercises.
Good luck to your friend and to you. She is fortunate to have someone so caring in her corner.
You can encourage a person when they are doing something. Encouraging a person who is not doing what you think they should be doing is telling them what to do.
I see. Kind of like when you told her what to do and not to do here:
Quote:
You have no business telling anyone what to do, ever.
I spent so many years telling people what they should do --
...
This is what's so frustrating. Of course people know. This kind of willful behavior is one thing I have a hard time dealing with.
At a club locally, there's a guy who comes in with his oxygen tank, sets it on the floor, and lights a cigarette. No one says anything! I tell hubby to leave when he comes in; I won't go there. Should I refrain? I suppose. But sometimes you have to try and get it through people's heads just how stupid they are being. Then, if they get mad at you for caring, you've got something to think about.
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Slowly, very slowly, through therapy, speech and movement returned. Soon he could sit. Then he could stand. Soon he could walk a few steps while holding onto a walker. Now, years later, he walks with no cane, drives, talks very well, etc. He did do his therapy as prescribed.
