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So there's someone (I won't reveal her real name, let's just call her "Jessica") that I became acquainted with several years ago and for a few years I worked with "Jessica". We talked and did a few things that workmates do. Things went well enough that when I joined Facebook and was in a conversation with someone else, "Jessica" replied to the conversation to acknowledge my appearance on Facebook. "Jessica" accepted my friend request and things went well for a while and we got to know each other a little better. Then some "big tension" occured which erupted and it resulted in us not talking to each other for over two years.
After these years, I decided to add "Jessica" as a friend on Facebook again, thinking that two years is probably enough time and space for the dust to have settled. "Jessica" accepted the friend request and we had a short but seemingly happy conversation. I then go to check her profile and we're not friends on Facebook. What?
I would understand if "Jessica" was still unhappy with what happened during the "big tension" (although in the past, she has seemed the type to want to put bad times in the past behind her), but it is odd that a person would unfriend someone almost immediately after having a good dialogue with them. For what it is worth I made no mention of the "big tension" during the dialogue and I think "Jessica" would prefer it that way. The "big tension" happened a reasonably long time ago, as I said - so I don't see why it would still be fresh in her mind.
If "Jessica" was still angry or no longer had interest, she could've ignored me when I tried to talk to her but she asked me how I was and what I'd been up to.
What do you think? Do you think she could be having insecurity issues? I'd be interested in getting to know "Jessica" again, but I don't know how I should approach this situation.
She changed her mind and unfriended you... there is nothing to approach. It doesn't matter what her issues may or may not be. She does not want to be your Facebook friend.
She changed her mind and unfriended you... there is nothing to approach. It doesn't matter what her issues may or may not be. She does not want to be your Facebook friend.
Move on.
If she'd just ignored me when I talked to her and then unfriended me, I'd agree with you and wouldn't even be here about this.
But she took an interest, the conversation was positive and then I later find that we're not friends. If she simply didn't want to be my Facebook friend, why would she have a positive conversation with me? "Jessica" has been someone who will be rude to you if she wants to be, but she wasn't rude at all, she was nice.
Maybe she wanted to see if you would mention the "big tension" (and maybe even if you would apologize for it??), and when you didn't, just decided to unfriend you.
IF you really wanted to know, you should give HER a call, as she is the only one who has the answers you want.
Maybe she wanted to see if you would mention the "big tension" (and maybe even if you would apologize for it??), and when you didn't, just decided to unfriend you.
IF you really wanted to know, you should give HER a call, as she is the only one who has the answers you want.
As I said in the original post, she is someone that has liked to put the bad times behind her and has believed in "letting drama go". By not mentioning it, there is no drama. Only a positive conversation. If she still remembers the "big tension", she could see that I had no interest in bringing up stale drama.
Look I'll be honest with you here about Facebook.....
When people add you, they size you up.
Don't ask me why people do this, just accept the way it is.
I've had co-workers drop me from their list for no reason whatsoever.
I personally believe Facebook is all about image reputation.
Look I'll be honest with you here about Facebook.....
When people add you, they size you up.
Don't ask me why people do this, just accept the way it is.
I've had co-workers drop me from their list for no reason whatsoever.
I personally believe Facebook is all about image reputation.
Exactly. I've added people, saw the craziness they put on their pages in terms of politics, religion, and so on, and took them right back off. No, I'm not going to share your dopey picture asking everyone to pray for the President to drop dead.
OP, she probably saw something on your page that turned her off. Or maybe she didn't want you looking at her page and photos. There's nothing you can do about it, so just let it go.
I think that people take the term "friends" on Facebook too literally. She may have been open to saying hello and catching up but did not want to keep in touch with you on a regular basis. Facebook is weird and creates issues that simply did not exist in the pre Facebook era. I would try to not take anything she did personally and just accept that she does not appear interested in maintaining a long term friendship with you.
Look I'll be honest with you here about Facebook.....
When people add you, they size you up.
Don't ask me why people do this, just accept the way it is.
I've had co-workers drop me from their list for no reason whatsoever.
I personally believe Facebook is all about image reputation.
I really don't think she'd care what others think about her "image reputation". I haven't known her to be like that - the opposite actually.
Exactly. I've added people, saw the craziness they put on their pages in terms of politics, religion, and so on, and took them right back off. No, I'm not going to share your dopey picture asking everyone to pray for the President to drop dead.
OP, she probably saw something on your page that turned her off. Or maybe she didn't want you looking at her page and photos. There's nothing you can do about it, so just let it go.
I didn't ask her to share anything and I can't see anything on my page that would turn her off. You may be right about me seeing her page and photos, but she had no problem putting me in a position where I could see them (when she accepted the request) and if she was just insecure you'd think she'd stop others from seeing them too.
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