Black Sheep in the Family (father, siblings, female, male)
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Reading here lately there have been a lot of threads and posts about people misbehaving in families. Sometimes male and sometimes female. Many people I know have a brother or sister that has caused the family all kinds of problems and the rest of the family seems to be o.k. I have a sister that just about destroyed my family. A friend of mine has a sister that seems to have the same playbook. Another friend of mine has a brother that was in all kinds of trouble and did a lot of family damage. No one has now heard from him in years.
People get bored, their SOs become complacent, people stop putting the effort into their relationships.
Dysfunctional relationships go back further than recorded history, I'm sure, it's just that CD is a place for people to air things.
People get bored, their SOs become complacent, people stop putting the effort into their relationships.
Dysfunctional relationships go back further than recorded history, I'm sure, it's just that CD is a place for people to air things.
People are individuals, there is no set plan on how everyone will turn out. Some are considered black sheep even if they aren't. Maybe they don't fit the mold of what the family wants.
Yes, it's a variety of reasons. Sometimes one may have felt apart from the family growing up, or felt inferior to the others' "perfection" and they go their own way, competition between siblings can be devastating. Sometimes it doesn't take going off course by all that much to make for one to be an outcast, other times they go way out on some limb.
Or sometimes one ended up influenced by peer pressure, got hooked on something that is difficult to quit, or it can be emotional problems like depression that just seems to strike one.
Reading here lately there have been a lot of threads and posts about people misbehaving in families. Sometimes male and sometimes female. Many people I know have a brother or sister that has caused the family all kinds of problems and the rest of the family seems to be o.k. I have a sister that just about destroyed my family. A friend of mine has a sister that seems to have the same playbook. Another friend of mine has a brother that was in all kinds of trouble and did a lot of family damage. No one has now heard from him in years.
Every family has one. Some are just worse than others.
If you asked my sister, she would probably blame me. We were in family therapy once because of her evil doings and she said it was all my fault because she couldn't live up to my reputation. She was really still a kid and had a hard time with people expecting more of her in school because I was a good student.
Her problems were her own fault. I think because she wasn't willing to work hard enough to best me, she chose to go in the totally opposite direction. She did a lot of damage to a lot of people. In the end, she turned herself around and became pretty normal. But we spent years cleaning up the mess she left in one way or another.
She did damage but her misdoings were mostly childish and amateur attempts at malevolence. My BIL, OTOH, was and is truly evil. An accomplished master of all the black arts you could possibly use to hurt others. A master manipulator. Liar and thief are probably the kindest words you could use to describe him. I'm sure he is so mentally ill that he should have been locked up years ago for the safety of the general population. My best guess at a diagnosis is sociopath but I'm not a psychiatrist, even on TV.
This guy is slick. He can and has flimflammed a lot of people. Intelligent, well educated people. He never tells the truth when a lie will do and he has a totally invented persona. His whole life is a lie. I'm not sure if he even knows the truth anymore.
He has been in lots of trouble with the law but he had the money to have his felony convictions expunged. He took the money from others. Some of the charges were weapons related, including having a silencer. He was caught with all this illegal stuff while he was 'working' as a caregiver to mentally disabled adults. You can't really call it working because what he was really doing was stealing their money.
He claims to have killed people. But remember, everything he says is a lie. He has this whole fake/delusional career as some as some kind of a secret agent working for Uncle Sam. We used to get letters from him supposedly from "Banana Land" where he was on some kind of secret black ops mission for the government. Parts of the letter would be blacked out with a sharpie as if it had been done by a censor. Very amateurish and it would be funny if it wasn't so sick. In reality, I don't think he has even been out of the country more than 2 or 3 times in his life. For a long time we thought it was possible he was the Unabomber because he resembled the picture that was so widely circulated.
The truth as I know it is that he inherited a substantial amount of money when he was young. He spent 20+, yes 20, years in college and all he walked out with was a teaching certificate. He stopped going to school when the young women started thinking he was a creepy old man and he couldn't attract them anymore. All together he probably worked for 10 years or so in his life. His main source of income has been, in one way or another stealing from people. He has written and published quite a few books on all his 'survival experiences'. Mostly all lies and inventions but they appeal to the doomsday survivalist crowd. He has worked his magic on schools and taught classes. He can be quite charismatic when it suits him.
He has harmed countless people. Why is he still out there? Because he is so slick no one believes you. And many of the people he conned are too embarrassed to speak up. And the institutions don't want to see their reputations harmed or have it be known they were duped. He is an expert at flying just below the radar, living on the edge. He thinks you should always be packed, ready to go, and be able to disappear at a moments notice.
I made a lifelong enemy of him when I refused to buy in to his fake life and all his lies. I was the one in the family who refused to tolerate his endless duplicity or make excuses for his behavior. Over the years, he has hurt me financially and in other ways. Honestly, I think quite a few of the individuals who did excuse his behavior did it out of fear. Or they thought he was just a harmless, delusional, nut bag. I believe that if someone ever started interviewing everyone they could find who has had dealings with this individual, he would be put away for life at the very least.
But he's still out there. Looking for his next victim.
Last edited by yellowsnow; 02-04-2012 at 11:47 AM..
Reason: added
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