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I guess it would depend on your relationship with them. Not everyone has fairytale parents. For instance, my parents completely cut me off when I married a black man and we didn't talk until my son was born. I'm rebuilding my relationship with them and although it's difficult at times (our relationship will always bear the weight of what happened) they are my parents and that will never change.
I'm guessing that your parents want more frequent phone calls and you're feeling as if you are being put on a very long leash?
Back in the dark ages, before my dad's parents got a telephone (we're talking the 60's here, and in a very rural area) he would sit down every Sunday evening and hammer out a 2-3 page letter on his typewriter. He would also get a letter from his mom on Tuesday or Wednesday that week. Each week, they wrote the letters. When telephones were available, my parents would call my grandparents each Sunday evening (long distance was expensive back then!) and chat, catching them up with their lives.
I call my mother at least every Sunday, and occasionally during the week if I know she's worried about a doctor's appointment or is concerned about the health of a dear friend. My husband laughs when I call, because I don't do much talking -- I listen to my mom talk. That's ok, she's a little lonely since my dad died, it doesn't cost me anything to listen but a little time. My husband talks to his mother about once or twice a week to say hi, it's usually never more than 10 minutes or so. Sometimes I call my MIL to chat, too, but only every few weeks since I know she's keep up through my husband.
Determine what you're comfortable with, and just make an effort to be somewhat consistent. I have a 27-year-old co-worker whose mother expects him to call EVERY DAY -- and she will call him at work if he misses his morning phone call. To me, that's excessive. But he puts up with it, so I guess it's ok with him. You have so many options available to you to keep in touch: texts, Skype, email, etc. I hope your parents are willing to be flexible. My son seldom calls -- he talks to people all day, he's talked out by the end of the day -- but we GoogleChat frequently as well as email and text. It works for us.
Parents just want to know that their children are well and happy. If you can find some way to include them by means other than phone calls, they may be content just to know that you aren't lying in a ditch somewhere. :-)
This thread was started in 2011! I'm surprised that this thread is still alive.... and I'm pretty sure the OP already has their answer by now, considering they're 26 now.
Quote:
Originally Posted by theropod
I'm 21 and I still live with them.
To live with your parents at that age is frowned upon in America. But then again, we see those who leave home at that age as rebels and disobedient.
I don't see leaving home at an early age as being frowned upon(as long as they're not still in High School, or dropped out), I think most parents in the US would see it as their kids starting to become independent. I think that most kids in the US still live with their parents in their early 20s, and that is something they should take advantage of while they are attending college. Most kids who are 18 and have graduated High School are far from having the skills to be independent despite the law claiming that they are adults and can legally live on their own. To still live with family and get a solid hold on your future (as long as you actually do work towards that) is not shameful, it's taking advantage of a good situation. It allows them to work on their degree without having to worry about rent or needing to have another job that leaves them drained and affects their studies and amount of time available for classes. I'm sure there are many people out there who wished they were able to take advantage of that when they were still working towards their degree.
BTW. my personal opinion on the opening subject (not really for the OP, but for anyone willing to read it), is that it all depends on how much interaction you feel comfortable with. That's something that varies from person to person, and there shouldn't really be any amount of time anyone feels obligated to interact with their parents.
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