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Do you think that your children will be able to live in NJ when they are in their 20's? Once my kids are done with their schooling and just starting out in their careers and maybe starting to prepare for marriage and a family, I am not to sure how they will do this in NJ with our high cost of living.
They will probably manage as best they can but I don't want my kids living paycheck to paycheck and always thinking about how to pay the mortgage. Much how we do. It really can make a persons quality of live poor and consume you. I am afraid that the next generation may not put up with this and move away to easier cost of living. Which means my four kids may be splattered all over the US. That would devastate me.
Would you think its better to move to an area where my children may have a better chance at a decent cost of living expense, lower housing prices and hopefully a decent job market? Has anyone done this because of just these factors? I know college or girl/boyfriend may lead any child to a new location in the long run but I hope to keep at least 2 of the 4 close to home, if not all.
My kids are young enough to move them and start a new life. They would make friends at this young age quickly. But my time is running out. Probably 2 more years and the oldest would think I was ruining his life!
I feel your pain. That's exactly why we re-located from NJ to OK about a year and a half ago. When we moved my kids were 16 and 18.
If I had it to do over, I would have moved when they were younger. My daughter made an excellent adjustment. She was a sophomore in high school when we moved. She's made tons of friends and has a very active social life. My son, however, still claims he will go back to NJ. He's currently in a local voc-tech school for carpentry, but dreams of going back. He was already out of high school when we moved. I think if he had gone to high school here, his adjustment would have been better.
He's adjusted somewhat recently, hasn't said too much about NJ, but I'm not sure if he will ever be happy here. Once he finishes school, he will have no problem getting a job, and he can buy a small starter home for under $100,000, with low taxes. Will he take advantage of that? Only time will tell.
Because of the COL here, both his education and my daughter's college is affordable, so neither one of them will have student loans. I think that would give them a great start in life, but we'll see.
Again, the main advice I would give if this is something you really want to do, then get out before they get too old.
It all depends on your priorities. When I was a child and in my teens I'd hear my family having this same discussion "They will never be able to afford to live here." "How will they afford a home in NJ?" Well, I'm living and I have a home here... it's tough, but we manage.
I personally want to be near my family, my friends, the life I've come to know and actually love... So I'm not real anxious to go anywhere. I DO have my days where I feel sick of the ratrace, but I'm sure I'd have my days no matter where I lived.
It all depends on what YOU and your family puts the most value on.
The cost of living in California, NYC, Wash DC is much higher than NJ's. NJ has plenty of affordable towns, in north, central and south jersey. There is a real problem with the lower middle class in NJ, they are getting squeezed the most. The general middle class NJ making < $100K - might be looking at a 4 bedroom house when they only need 3, might not be willing to move to another more affordable town, might not be willing to commute, might not be willing drive anything but a new car, etc. Our cost of living is higher than the national average but it is not insane. Anywhere incomes are high, taxes and high cost of living will follow. What you generally find is that the truth is in the middle. The people that cry about COL are the same people that try to buy a vacation condo, new cars, etc.
Last edited by MoorestownResident; 05-11-2009 at 09:19 AM..
I'm keeping my kids in NJ. Generally people in NJ are sharp, quick witted and on the ball. I want my kids to grow up around that...it's something you can't teach. If they want to move to TN or OK to buy a cheap house when they grow up....they are welcome.
I have faith in my kids to be able to support themselves. In fact, I hope they live in NYC at some point in their lives - after that, NJ will seem like a bargain.
I agree - and would love to move out of NJ for this reason. I would prefer my kids do not go to college in NJ and do not live here after graduation. Dh grew up here and since "everything is here" (in NJ), has no desire to live anywhere else. I think there are much better places to live in the US, so I hope we can retire somewhere near where my kids can get jobs and a good start after college.
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