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So we clear about 170K a year (up to 200K) on my husband's income. If we had made that much when we were both working and didn't have kids we could have easily afforded a 500K mortgage.
But a few things.
Knowing something of the California tax situation I would make sure that you look at net pay vs gross.
Also, and your situation may be nothing like ours but I never planned on being a stay at home mom, or paying for two private school tuitions, the multitude of kids' activities, vacations with four people etc. So while we make about as much as you do (and live in a no income tax state) our mortgage of 300K is about as much as we can afford comfortably. Not to discourage you because you "can" afford it, just try to think about all of the possibilities going forward. Good luck!