I really dislike it here. Please help! (Houston, Dallas: transplants, apartment)

[JazzOne]

I moved to Houston about a month ago for a job, and I must say that this is my least favorite place to live. For me, it's not about nostaligia for my home town. I've lived in El Paso, Chicago, Las Vegas, Beijing, Austin, Dallas, and now Houston. Out of those cities, Houston is my least favorite.

It's not the heat. I'm a slim Texan, so I can endure 100+ temperatures without so much as a complaint. And it's not the unsightly concrete jungle either. In fact, I rather like urban cityskapes. (Though I have to admit that Houston is far less beautfiul than the other major cities I have been to.)

But what really bothers me is how unfriendly the people are here. In the last four weeks, I have been treated SO rudely, by nearly everyone I come across. People drive rudely. Many people will not speak to me, even if I say hi first. And when people find out that I used to live in Dallas, OMG, it sparks a f'ing **** storm of douchebaggery, Dallas bashing, and H-town jock riding.

So what gives? I love to travel. I love to meet new people. I'm excited to be in a new place with heralded restaurants and tons of opportunity. There must be some nice folks here. Where the heck are they?

I really want to like Houston. Please help. Where can a 30-something attorney find some intelligent conversation, or maybe even just a smile instead of a snear?

[fitzy24]

Do you work downtown? I would either smile or say hello back.

[JazzOne]

I do work downtown, but I have relegated myself to the tunnels because I get accosted by the panhandlers up top. Don't get me wrong. I have a lot of sympathy for the suffering of others, but even the bums are extremely rude here. I told a beggar I was broke the other day (which I am due to my recent move), and he suggested that I buy him something with my credit card. The nerve!

[jimboburnsy]

Okay. The last sentence brought it all together.

"Dallas lawyer"

I'm afraid I can't help you if there is a component of longing for Dallas, however, I will say that this town can be a tough nut to crack. Most social groups are "full" and making new friends who are established in this city and hang out with essentially the same group of people that they have since kindergarten is difficult. It's much worse on early-mid career professionals since everyone is jockeying for status and club memberships. You're in a tough boat.

Stick it out for a while and wait for nicer weather. People drive and behave in a friendlier manner when the weather is cooler.

What part of town are you living in? Where are you working and who are you working for?

By the way, what works with panhandlers is unflinching eye-contact and a "no" hand gesture. No speaking.

[Lost_In_Translation]

I don't know. Maybe the heat is making people cranky.

[JazzOne]

Originally Posted by jimboburnsy

Okay. The last sentence brought it all together.

"Dallas lawyer"

You're proving my point. I have no love lost for Dallas. I actually enjoyed Austin much more than Dallas. But the Houston locals bash me for no other reason than the fact that I have followed opportunities all around the state. I find that to be rather sad, TBH.

Originally Posted by jimboburnsy

I'm afraid I can't help you if there is a component of longing for Dallas, however, I will say that this town can be a tough nut to crack. Most social groups are "full" and making new friends who are established in this city and hang out with essentially the same group of people that they have since kindergarten is difficult. It's much worse on early-mid career professionals since everyone is jockeying for status and club memberships. You're in a tough boat.

Stick it out for a while and wait for nicer weather. People drive and behave in a friendlier manner when the weather is cooler.

What part of town are you living in? Where are you working and who are you working for?

I appreciate this part of your post. I'm really not interested in jockeying for status or club memberships. I just don't want to be treated like a social pariah.

The part of town I live in is definitely part of the problem. I currently live near Inwood, and I hate it. I only moved there because I am working a four-month contract, and I had trouble finding someone who would lease an apartment to me for less than six months. It turns out that my landlord is a slumlord who switched the air conditioner after I viewed the apartment but before I moved in. So, my current AC is a joke, and there seems to be no city ordinance requiring landlords to provide adequate AC. Real classy, Houston.

I am working downtown for a major commercial litigation law firm. I don't want to out myself, so I will not disclose the name, but this firm is ranked highly and has a national presence. I absolutely LOVE my job, and I am trying so hard to like Houston too.

[14Bricks]

Originally Posted by JazzOne

I moved to Houston about a month ago for a job, and I must say that this is my least favorite place to live. For me, it's not about nostaligia for my home town. I've lived in El Paso, Chicago, Las Vegas, Beijing, Austin, Dallas, and now Houston. Out of those cities, Houston is my least favorite.

It's not the heat. I'm a slim Texan, so I can endure 100+ temperatures without so much as a complaint. And it's not the unsightly concrete jungle either. In fact, I rather like urban cityskapes. (Though I have to admit that Houston is far less beautfiul than the other major cities I have been to.)

But what really bothers me is how unfriendly the people are here. In the last four weeks, I have been treated SO rudely, by nearly everyone I come across. People drive rudely. Many people will not speak to me, even if I say hi first. And when people find out that I used to live in Dallas, OMG, it sparks a f'ing **** storm of douchebaggery, Dallas bashing, and H-town jock riding.

So what gives? I love to travel. I love to meet new people. I'm excited to be in a new place with heralded restaurants and tons of opportunity. There must be some nice folks here. Where the heck are they?

I really want to like Houston. Please help. Where can a 30-something attorney find some intelligent conversation, or maybe even just a smile instead of a snear?

Native born Houstonians are nice, the ones who will give you that southern hospitality. Its the transplants, the people who move here from other places that act like D-bags. Have you tried making friends withe the people you work with, or doing something like fantasy football. Thats a good way to meet people.

[JazzOne]

Originally Posted by jimboburnsy

By the way, what works with panhandlers is unflinching eye-contact and a "no" hand gesture. No speaking.

I'll give this a try. I feel like such a jerk when I blow people off. But these bums expect you to stop and listen to their nonsense. I have $h!t to do! Keep up with me if you want to talk!

[Bily Lovec]

Are you a Gringo ?

[JazzOne]

Originally Posted by 14Bricks

Native born Houstonians are nice, the ones who will give you that southern hospitality. Its the transplants, the people who move here from other places that act like D-bags. Have you tried making friends withe the people you work with, or doing something like fantasy football. Thats a good way to meet people.

We all gather downtown for work, and then we all disperse in the evening. It doesn't seem like my coworkers do a lot of hanging out together. I tried having lunch with one of the attorneys in my office, but he was too busy.