Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Yes, it does. I'm not denying that. It's just that the proportion of those success stories to the unsuccessful ones is on the order of 1 success for every 100 failures. The statistics bear me out. Heartsong notes roughly 1 out of every two Christian marriages ends in divorce. What she doesn't mention (no fault of hers, this wasn't the topic) are people like this:
and this:
and this
Story after story---page after page!
And these are the Christian couples who choose to stay together. God bless them for obeying Jesus' commandment not to divorce and riding it through. But do these marriages sound like the kind of storybook romances young 20-somethings fill their hours dreaming about and fantasizing over?
So when I say 1 out of 100 I don't think I am exaggerating.
>>>>Not all of us were meant to have a spouse.
Very true, and for those who have chosen to make themselves "eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom" more power to them. But that is a voluntary choice. Cold comfort for those who are eunuchs or in hellish marriages against their wills.
With all due respect, while I think their stories are tragic, there's a lot of happily married christian couples too and they aren't posting on forums about it because they're too busy enjoying it. *nods*
I realized that many people who start threads or who post stuff like this are the ones deeply unhappy with their marriage probably have issues within themselves that they too need to work out. They just aren't doing it. They're just looking for an outlet. There was recently a man in the relationship section who kept bad mouthing his wife all the time on there behind her back and then next thing we knew she joined the site and started responding to him too and began to talk about all the stuff he was doing. It COMPLETELY changed the way posters saw things. This actually resulted in a divorce for them. We're just spectators. We don't really know what's going on people's individual marriages.
No clue why the OP thinks Christians are "standing on Genesis 2:18" thinking God will deliver a spouse to their front door. Christians pray for God to help and guide them on all issues, but I have never met anyone who fits the OP description.
The generalized topic "The Disastrous State of Christian Marriages & Relationships" ices the cake suggesting all, or most Christian marriages are in dire straits. LOL. Seems the OP is projecting something about his/her own life here.
IMHO, lots of Christians are given perfectly good choices for spouses. However, they have their priorities in the wrong place. They exclude some because of appearance, age difference, social status, income and others. ( I admit that I did this when I was in the dating scene.) I also believe that our internet society may retarded some people's social skills, so that they have a difficult time meeting and interacting with people face to face.
Yes, exactly. That's what I meant when I said earlier about girls writing a letter to God about what they want in their future husband and putting in it "at the top of the list of my wishes, Lord, he must have hair on his head, teeth in his mouth, be devastatingly handsome like Dr. McDreamy, have a sense of humor to make me laugh when I need cheering up, yet sensitive to my needs and know not to provoke me when I'm in my period."
I mean, come on. Even God can't deal with a wishlist that demanding. And sadly, lots of girls pass up good, sensitive caring men like the ones in those letters because they were too busy waiting for their own Dr. McDreamy to ride up to them on his white horse in shining armor, which of course never happened.
This is part of what I wanted to deal with in my second reply to Royalite.
I don't get why they should have to settle? Too many people have done this because of the belief that they can't do any better and they end up in just as miserable a state as the ones who want a relationship so it's not that black and white. These men, for all I know, might have some issues they aren't alluding to that I don't want to deal with that and I shouldn't have to. For me, their post alone is a bit of a turn off.
But sometimes you find someone who complements your life so perfectly that your expectations are shattered. You realize that even though that person isn't everything on your list they're exactly what you need. But you can't force chemistry. And I say that from experience.
Last edited by Royalite; 06-30-2013 at 05:50 PM..
Reason: tagged the wrong person. Sorry.
Yes, exactly. That's what I meant when I said earlier about girls writing a letter to God about what they want in their future husband and putting in it "at the top of the list of my wishes, Lord, he must have hair on his head, teeth in his mouth, be devastatingly handsome like Dr. McDreamy, have a sense of humor to make me laugh when I need cheering up, yet sensitive to my needs and know not to provoke me when I'm on my period."
I mean, come on. Even God can't deal with a wishlist that demanding. And sadly, lots of girls pass up good, sensitive caring men like the ones in those letters because they were too busy waiting for their own Dr. McDreamy to ride up to them on his white horse in shining armor, which of course never happened.
This is part of what I wanted to deal with in my second reply to Royalite.
ChristianMingles and Match.com?
You forgot about being financially secure, having multiple degrees; and your own personal aircraft for traveling throughout the rest of your lives?
And this, which had me rolling on the floor.
Bypass my profile if any of the things below describe you: You don't like animals. Your stomach resembles that of a 6 month pregnant woman. Your nails are longer than mine. You're arrogant, cheap or selfish. You have a felony (regardless of the class). You have questionable hygiene. You are missing teeth (wisdom teeth excluded). You have mental problems. You can wear the same size pants as me (I am a size 4, so for a guy that would be 28" or less). Your back or chest resembles that of a Chia Pet. You are looking for a 1 night stand. You don't know what the word courtship means or how to spell it. You wear, as much or more jewelry than Mr. T. Your profile picture is of you flexing with your shirt off or flexing period! You don't have a sense of humor. You don't have a job. You drive a van. You are not a US Citizen. You live with your parents or your wife. You have been married as many or more times than Elizabeth Taylor. On a scale of 1-10 you truly believe you are a 10. You lived during The Great Depression. You have been interviewed by Chris Hansen on Dateline's "To Catch a Predator." You have a uni brow. Must have a 3 digit IQ. If none of the above things apply to you then I may be your girl!
But, I have to admit: I love a sense of humor, coupled with truth.
I believe the Bible says Marriage is the natural ordinance God has established for Man, Woman, and children. Paul was speaking by his opinion regarding one remaining single. The scripture is clear that a spouse is healthy for the opposite sex. It keeps us from fornication, adultery, etc. God has given us a strong desire to reproduce and His method of containing this to be healthy not destructive is marriage.
It's not good for man to be alone. Or a woman. Marriage is a good thing. So are children being raised in a Christian home.
The Christian family unit should be demonstrating the light of Jesus Christ proving what's acceptable to God to this dark confused world.
No clue why the OP thinks Christians are "standing on Genesis 2:18" thinking God will deliver a spouse to their front door. Christians pray for God to help and guide them on all issues, but I have never met anyone who fits the OP description.
The generalized topic "The Disastrous State of Christian Marriages & Relationships" ices the cake suggesting all, or most Christian marriages are in dire straits. LOL. Seems the OP is projecting something about his/her own life here.
(sigh) Some people either don't read my earlier posts carefully or their memory span is roughly comparable to that of a gnat. For those who might be suffering from one or both maladies I will put it in 1st grade primer form so it is more easily retained:
1. most Christians desiring marriage have been taught to pray to God for a suitable spouse and then wait on God
2. the vast majority wait and wait and wait and wait and eventually find themselves old, single and completely in the dark as to why God never answered their prayers
3. the excuse they most commonly give as to why they believed God would send them a spouse is "Genesis 2:18 says that the Lord said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.' So I believed God knew I didn't want to be alone. But I am still alone.”
4. they failed to realize that God never makes a promise anywhere in His Word that He will find them a suitable spouse, or a spouse at all for that matter.
To say, "I have never met anyone who fits the OP description" merely shows you don't get out very much, Finn. That, or you never bothered to read the half dozen or so letters I posted which I clearly stated are culled from hundreds of similar letters I've read on the web that are buried amongst thousands of similar letters on various sites related to Christian marital or singles problems.
Once more in a nutshell, most Christians who pray to God for a spouse never get one or they get a disastrous marriage. Statistics bear this out.
As to the rest of your post, well it's not worth addressing.
At this point it is clear the OP is simply making stuff up. I guess it was clear from the begining.
If you think prayer will ruin your chances of finding a spouse, then for heavens sakes, don't pray.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
We're just spectators. We don't really know what's going on people's individual marriages.
Even God can't deal with a wishlist that demanding. And sadly, lots of girls pass up good, sensitive caring men like the ones in those letters because they were too busy waiting for their own Dr. McDreamy to ride up to them on his white horse in shining armor, which of course never happened.
Some people either don't read my earlier posts carefully or their memory span is roughly comparable to that of a gnat. For those who might be suffering from one or both maladies I will put it in 1st grade primer form so it is more easily retained:
