private school admissions process is the worst (chapel, buyers)

[FunnyMomof2]

The private school admissions process is the worst. It needs to be reformed. I hate this.

For those of you that got accepted every where you applied- you are very blessed and lucky.

For us- not so lucky. Waitlisted at #1 choice and accepted at our #2 choice.

Our #2 contract/deposit isn’t due until Friday. Not sure why it was the 18th and not the 16th, but it was to our advantage. I just feel so bad. #2 school just called to ask if we are coming b/c they have waitlist students calling to ask. I said YES, and I would deliver our contract tomorrow. I’m working today.

As for #1, I’ve left voice mails and emails. I’ve had a little of feedback from one person at the school- really didn’t tell me much at all. The Admission Director hasn’t called me back. I realize they are busy.

I just hate this.
This is my analogy:

It is like we have been dating two schools: School #2 and School #1. We really like #2, and school #2 has now proposed marriage. School #1- well, we are in love with #1- they have the grandest of it all! #1 bought the engagement ring (ie, the waitlist), but #1 is hanging onto the ring and not proposing.

I think it is very clear and I have my answer. I just wish this process would change. There must be a better way. I know a lot of families hoping to get a call today. ]

[CityFan]

Evedently it's not a buyers' market. It seems like we need more top ranked schools to meet needs of all people. Maybe they can post some admission requirements based on certain test scores.

[FunnyMomof2]

I know a lot of families going to their #2 or #3 choices. Just the way the cookie crumbled. There are a lot of GREAT private schools in this city. It is just so hard when you have your heart set on one and then face the disappointment. I will be fine. I certainly know there are much bigger problems in life. Having two children- one healthy and one who was very sick and passed away- I do know the importance of priorities. I just am hurt. My child is the world to me and I really thought I had made the best choice - I guess that school didn't want us as badly as we wanted them.

Oh well - moving on! Sorry I got off tangent there.

[CMMom]

I'm sorry to hear of your frustration. It is a bizarre system. I'm also so sorry to hear of the loss of your child; I really cannot imagine what that must be like.

Regarding the schools, I think that there is such demand that they kind of have all of us over a barrel, so to speak. I don't know how it's done in other cities. I know that the JATP system was actually set up many years ago to try to ease the burden of the application process on parents and kids (so that they wouldn't have to undergo multiple tests at multiple schools). But you still have to go for each school's individual observation, so what effort does that really save?

I'd be interested to start a thread about this on the boards of some other big cities to see how the system works. I have heard that NYC and DC have similar systems (as far as requiring IQ tests of applicants), but don't know any specifics.

I know it's no consolation, but if you reapply to #1 choice again next year, I think that that shows commitment to the school and may be an advantage for you as opposed to first-time applicants (they know you would accept an offer if given one).

[FunnyMomof2]

Thanks, CMMom.

You're exactly right. And yes- the JATP process is going away from what I hear- apparently not soon enough! I think there used to be 25 schools involved in it and now there are 10 or 12? I can't remember. I remember touring one of the schools and they said "We don't do the JATP, because it is unfair, we don't believe in it, and it does not give accurate results." I thought that was nice- but still didn't apply at the school - b/c of religious issues.

I would love to see how this process works in other cities.

And yes- we will probably re-apply at #1 next year. It really is too early for me to even say that. We might go to our #2 choice and just love it and our son will make wonderful friends.

And thanks for your sympathy. Yes - it has been an unbelievable journey. Our daughter passed away almost 18 months ago. The first year was torture, but I feel like I am living again. That is why I really am mad at myself for getting so upset over this school issue b/c I truly know what it is like to be the mom of a sick child and spend countless nights at CHOA. Our son will be fine. He is loved and nurtured. I look at it this way- it is the school's loss.

We will jump right in at the new school and be involved as we always have been with his preschool years.

Wishing everyong the best and closure with this school process.

I don't know about you- but I'm ready for the summer!

[RainyRainyDay]

My sympathies to those struggling with a difficult process and of course for FunnyMom's loss, which does put everything into perspective.

Reading threads like this just makes me incredulous at the posters on other threads who think public education is anathema and that we would all be living in nirvana if the state just closed the public schools and handed out vouchers, because the ever-glorious private sector would bless every single family in the state with a high-quality private education.

Right now, the private sector is apparently rejecting plenty of families who have the motivation and means to send their kids to private school. And those who are privileged to be admitted aren't 100% happy with the process.

[kagmypts]

Originally Posted by RainyRainyDay

My sympathies to those struggling with a difficult process and of course for FunnyMom's loss, which does put everything into perspective.

Reading threads like this just makes me incredulous at the posters on other threads who think public education is anathema and that we would all be living in nirvana if the state just closed the public schools and handed out vouchers, because the ever-glorious private sector would bless every single family in the state with a high-quality private education.

Right now, the private sector is apparently rejecting plenty of families who have the motivation and means to send their kids to private school. And those who are privileged to be admitted aren't 100% happy with the process.

First, good luck to all who are dealing with the private school admissions process. I know that it is not easy, but hopefully it will be over soon. FunnyMom, I really do feel sorry for your loss. I cannot even imagine what you have been through... for those of us with kids, I would venture to guess that our biggest fear is losing one (or more of them).

RainyRainyDay, I have no idea what school vouchers have to do with this thread. The entire school choice process, whether involving only private schools or some mix of public/private schools, is very grueling. It takes its emotional and physical toll on those currently involved in the process. I do not recall anybody saying that vouchers would solve all schooling problems/issues (or that public schools should be closed), but vouchers do address the financial stress imposed on those who choose private schools (and you make one giant assumption when you say the people on this thread "have the motivation and means to send their kids to private school".... I did not read anybody discussing their financial position). Unfortunately, the education system will never be perfect - whether school vouchers exist or not. Consequently, everybody will not be 100% happy with their choices. Also, you are preaching to the wrong crowd as everyone who is in the midst of the private school admissions process favors private school for one reason or another.

In closing, good luck to all who are going through this process!

[FunnyMomof2]

Thank you everyone. We choose private school for a lot of reasons. The most important reason for us is because we want our son in a Christian School. We don't want Winter Holiday- we want Christmas. We don't want Spring Egg Hunt- we want EASTER. We also want weekly chapel for him. We are not crazy extremists either - before someone accuses me of some Right Wing thing... I'm an Independent - but that is off the subject! sorry...

We have just learned a lot through our loss about what is important. For us, we have chosen a private Christian school. When I asked my son if he missed his sister and he said "yes, she is in heaven, but mommy she lives in our hearts forever" - well, that is when I know we are doing something right. I do believe I'm making the right decisions for OUR family.

I do know we could move to a good school district and do public schools, but he would not get the Christian emphasis we desire. Isn't that the beauty of AMERICA? Being able to make a choice.

And yes, this private school process is by no means perfect- but what is? The good news- this is Kindergarten. This is not life or death. It is all going to be fine.

Wishing everyone a nice weekend.

[kagmypts]

Originally Posted by FunnyMomof2

Thank you everyone. We choose private school for a lot of reasons. The most important reason for us is because we want our son in a Christian School. We don't want Winter Holiday- we want Christmas. We don't want Spring Egg Hunt- we want EASTER. We also want weekly chapel for him. We are not crazy extremists either - before someone accuses me of some Right Wing thing... I'm an Independent - but that is off the subject! sorry...

We have just learned a lot through our loss about what is important. For us, we have chosen a private Christian school. When I asked my son if he missed his sister and he said "yes, she is in heaven, but mommy she lives in our hearts forever" - well, that is when I know we are doing something right. I do believe I'm making the right decisions for OUR family.

I do know we could move to a good school district and do public schools, but he would not get the Christian emphasis we desire. Isn't that the beauty of AMERICA? Being able to make a choice.

And yes, this private school process is by no means perfect- but what is? The good news- this is Kindergarten. This is not life or death. It is all going to be fine.

Wishing everyone a nice weekend.

I could not agree more. The public schools will never be able to offer a "spiritual education" (less everyone would be up in arms over the First Amendement), and that for one immediately sets any religiously denominated school apart from public education. As I have said before in other threads, there are some people who would never choose public school for lots of non- (purely) academic reasons. This may include the desire for religion, the ability to choose who your kids go to school with, a special learning disability, etc. On the contrary, there will be some people who will never want private school. As FunnyMom said, she has to do she thinks is best for HER family (just as every family needs to). Yes, that is the beauty of America!

[charolastra00]

Just take it as practice for the college admissions process. :P Except then it all costs 3 to 4 times as much a year and you're trying to juggle financial aid, early decision/early action/regular decision, and wait lists. By the time your kids get to college, you'll be ready!