Growing up in metro ATL vs. metro NY

[ElleKaye]

Originally Posted by Infinite_heights77

I think Southerners can be some of the most meanest people you'd ever meet. Don't let that southern hospitality fool you.

Yeah it can go either way but in general southerners have better manners and appear friendlier. That doesn't mean the manners are not disingenuous but it's just so. As far as true mean level, I don't disagree with you. One thing I have noticed is that southerners take way less lip service than northerners are used to issuing.

[hwalton]

Originally Posted by neil0311

I grew up in Queens, and I take exception to your characterization. I was brought up with manners and to be polite and respectful to elders and to say "please and thank you" and we even called adults Mr. and Mrs. My children were raised in Massachusetts, and the same is true. They have manners and respect.

Now...if you're equating thugs, ghetto, and rap types, you'll find those also in Atlanta. Not sure what you mean by "NY teens and kids" or how they are "rude and disrespectful."

Now...if you mean that kids up north don't call teachers and parents "ma'am" and "sir"...then you'd be correct. I am fine with that, as my kids aren't in the military and need to be respectful, but saying "yes ma'am" and "yes sir" to teachers and parents is over the top. That is one difference between southerners and most northerners.

As has been discussed many times, I think there is a general and broad difference in the mentality of many people in NY (and the northeast generally) and people in the south. Direct communication and a more sarcastic sense of humor is more normal in NY. In the south, directness is considered to be "rude" and people tend to be more nuanced and more subtle in their communication. People in NY are not actually being rude, but they don't try to sugar coat or use passive aggressiveness.

In NY, generally what you see is what you get, and I like that, and I try to encourage my kids to be polite yet be assertive. It's a balance between appearing confident...or appearing arrogant. I think some southerners assume arrogance when it's not the case.

I have to disagree. Even the GHETTOEST of the GHETTO kids have better manners than kids in NY. People is NY are generally disagreeable, loud, opinionated and think that the world revolves around NY.

[Infinite_heights77]

"People is NY are generally disagreeable, loud, opinionated and think that the world revolves around NY."

*Well, coming from a city that encompasses well over a 8.5 million people, a megalopolis of cultures, languages, attitudes and personalities, one should have a reasonable understanding of how and why people from NYC conduct themselves the way they do especially when you have a city where practically ever known nation is pretty much represented in NY vying for validation and stability; I expect some human friction and contention. I know some NY city children, very bright, inquisitive and intelligent who speak 3 or 4 languages just by the proximity of their surroundings and interaction within other ethnic clans. In essence, the world somewhat revolves around NY, that's just the way it is.

Originally Posted by hwalton

I have to disagree. Even the GHETTOEST of the GHETTO kids have better manners than kids in NY. People is NY are generally disagreeable, loud, opinionated and think that the world revolves around NY.

[Infinite_heights77]

Some of the most nicest and helpful people I've ever encountered were in New York City.

[Infinite_heights77]

"In NY, generally what you see is what you get, and I like that, and I try to encourage my kids to be polite yet be assertive. It's a balance between appearing confident...or appearing arrogant. I think some southerners assume arrogance when it's not the case."

**EXACTLY!! One can be polite, but assertive and confident. One can exhibit kindness and love (tough or not), without appearing to be weak and that is what most southerns don't understand about northern mentalities and ways.

Originally Posted by neil0311

And I'll say it again...maybe those are poor inner city kids you're hanging around. You can see that same type of kid here in many parts of Atlanta, and in many urban neighborhoods. You will not find that kind of thing on Long Island and in middle class or affluent place in NY, just as you will generally not find it in many middle class parts of Atlanta.

Can you not understand the concept of class here...rather than geography?

OH...and I would never use the term "MAD disrespectful" since I speak English and communicate clearly, as I taught my children to do.

[Infinite_heights77]

"People is NY are generally disagreeable, loud, opinionated and think that the world revolves around NY."

*My ex was from Brooklyn, she could be like that as well at times, but she had other favorable traits as well that outshined many of her rusty NewYorkcentric ways.

[AnsleyPark]

I swear, I cannot tell a "niceness" or "friendliness" difference among any parts of the country. Generally, folks treat you like you treat them.