Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
I am sure I would be just as happy as I am now if my parents would have given me money and cars and I did not have to live in the hood in Oxnard where I could have died because of stray bullets or raped or robbed or shot for having $10 on me.
I was pretty oblivious to how dangerous my area really is until I did a ride along with a cop. He educated me on what's going on and that I should be more careful, especially not walking my dog at night. I asked him how he knows that - he said everyone working in that area knows me - I stick out because I am the only white, tall woman who walks a dog at night.
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Happiness is not the same thing as ambition.
In high school, one of my friends parents owned a bank and they sold it to Wells Fargo for 40 million dollars. At the time I was really envious, thinking he could do pretty much anything he wanted. But the money didn't seem to make him real happy. Careerwise he hasn't really done much at all. His parents bought him a house and a car. He has been in and out of rehab. He doesn't trust women because he thinks they are after his money. He is wealthy, but his wealth hasn't made him happy. He lacked purpose, he lacked ambition. Guys really though do seem to need purpose.
But that is one of the things that had me wondering where does ambition come from? To me, I think that there is an element of it comes from how we spring back from adversity. You need a certain amount of adversity to motivate you to change. Too little adversity, you flounder, too much you are overwhelmed and give up. But up to a certain point more adversity mostly just means more motivation. Cockroaches and homeless guys sleeping in my parking spot in Santa Monica was both challenging for me, but also really motivating me. I really wanted out of that situation and that experience really focused my attention.
But to be fair, one of the reasons I ended up moving to Sacramento and away from Coastal California was that I thought it was much easier getting ahead outside of Coastal California. What you spent on your house to live in the hood in Oxnard, probably would have gotten you into a much better neighborhood in Sacramento and if you moved out to say Texas an even better neighborhood than what you found in Sacramento.
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
Just because you are poor or lost everything doesn't mean you cannot be neat/clean/organized. You can mow your lawn. Pick the weeds. You can pull your trash cans in. You don't have to throw trash in the gutter when you come from work and park your car on the street. And I will never understand why people collect junk cars in their yard.
My neighbors put a couch outside on their driveway. Why they f... did they not just throw it away aka have it hauled away for free? After a few months a cat gave birth in it and afterwards there were rats living in it. It annoyed the hell out of me to come home every day and see that ugly thing there. And no, they were not foreigners, they weren't white but they were born and raised in the US, worked normal jobs and completely capable of calling the city to have it hauled off. One day I saw them outside and told them there is a free haul away service. They nodded and walked off.
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I do agree with you completely on this one.
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