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I came home yesterday to see my family for Easter weekend. I moved out of state last year and took some of the furniture with me. The house feels relatively empty now. The dining table my dad used as a computer desk in the living room is now gone, and he took over my larger desk in the basement. The couch in the living room is also gone, and the living room is mostly vacant except for a curio cabinet and a bookshelf. The basement where we had the stereo equipment I bought, video games, several computers, tons of computer items, etc, is mostly cleaned out. It feels so strange coming back to this very large and empty feeling house. I doubt my parents will replace most of this stuff as they spend most of the time in the upstairs den and the bedrooms. None of this has been touched.
Did your kids ever comment or notice how empty some rooms felt since you're now empty nesters?
We moved to be near to daughter and grandkids. The young grandsons immediately notice whenever we get rid of, replace or add something new in our house/condo.
Our own 'kids' have been gone from where they grew-up for almost 20-years (we've been gone from the old home for about 13-years), so it's no longer an issue. As another thread expressed, they also don't want our 'treasured' pictures, furniture, dishes, etc. --- They have their own!
Many of the estate sales that I have attended feel like an episode of Hoarders. Generally very elderly women who recently died or have had to go to assisted living. They keep everything! Much of it is from the 1940s to 1960s. But then there is my 89 year old mother who lives in a small one bedroom senior apartment. She had maybe four chairs in her living room and a small dining set in her breakfast nook. Now she had gotten rid of the dining set and one of the chairs. It may be because she has a walker and one of those electric carts and needs more space to maneuver. But we have begged her for years to get a small sofa that we can sit on when we visit but she refuses. The only comfortable chair is the one that she sits on.
My kids have been gone from home for 6-8 years since they left to go to college. Now they live across the country and overseas. I still have some of their warmer clothes and musical instruments stashed away in their bedroom closets. One bedroom has turned into my exercise room (treadmill) and study with a new single bed in that room. In the other bedroom I put together their single beds to make a king-sized bed for a guest room. Their bedrooms and bathroom have been repainted and redecorated , as well as the kitchen. When they come home they remark how much nicer and clean the house looks. Otherwise, I have the same furniture but my kids talked me into a new TV a few months ago. I never had more than the necessary items (except when married).
Last edited by smpliving; 04-03-2015 at 08:06 AM..
I came home yesterday to see my family for Easter weekend. I moved out of state last year and took some of the furniture with me. The house feels relatively empty now. The dining table my dad used as a computer desk in the living room is now gone, and he took over my larger desk in the basement. The couch in the living room is also gone, and the living room is mostly vacant except for a curio cabinet and a bookshelf. The basement where we had the stereo equipment I bought, video games, several computers, tons of computer items, etc, is mostly cleaned out. It feels so strange coming back to this very large and empty feeling house. I doubt my parents will replace most of this stuff as they spend most of the time in the upstairs den and the bedrooms. None of this has been touched.
Did your kids ever comment or notice how empty some rooms felt since you're now empty nesters?
Bless your heart. I'm sure they miss you, but they sound like they are enjoying their new space. Your dad has the basement all to himself. It seems empty to you because it doesn't feel like home.
We spend a lot of time here talking about "downsizing" and getting rid of stuff. I gave my children their bedroom furniture when they married. I didn't miss it.
Location: On the "Left Coast", somewhere in "the Land of Fruits & Nuts"
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ABQ2015
Many of the estate sales that I have attended feel like an episode of Hoarders. Generally very elderly women who recently died or have had to go to assisted living. They keep everything! Much of it is from the 1940s to 1960s. But then there is my 89 year old mother who lives in a small one bedroom senior apartment. She had maybe four chairs in her living room and a small dining set in her breakfast nook. Now she had gotten rid of the dining set and one of the chairs. It may be because she has a walker and one of those electric carts and needs more space to maneuver. But we have begged her for years to get a small sofa that we can sit on when we visit but she refuses. The only comfortable chair is the one that she sits on.
Trust me, it ain't just elderly gals. My father passed away in his 80's, and had become a very reclusive sort towards the end. So cleaning out his house afterwards, we were amazed to find all the piles of paper bags, newspapers and empty milk cartons (all neatly cleaned), stacked everywhere along with boxes and boxes of assorted family 'memorabilia'. From the items he saved, it was clear he was privately a very sentimental individual. But as he grew older, it also became almost impossible for anyone in the family to meet or engage with him… as though that whole sentimental world of "family" now gone by, still lived on… but only in his head!
We had a new house built on an acre we had....that was almost 10 years ago,
the kids were already gone from our last house...we have the peke...the house
would feel empty without him....2 out of 3 kids live out of state...our daughter
visits several times a year, we love when they come here but they never think
of this place as the home they remember...
Strange question.
Short answer: no.
Longer answer: no. It's kind of like when dh & I spend a month or more in a vacation home, consider it our own, then leave. For awhile we dwelled there, now we don't.
For awhile our sons dwelled here in this house in which we live, now they don't.
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
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As empty nesters, does the house feel empty when your kids visit?
House feels Too Small, when kids come home!
We remodeled their previous space, added a kitchen, and rent it out!
Makes for a handy additional $1k/ month. (And the renter mows the lawn!) (and feeds the pets!) That is more than I got out of the kids the last 10 yrs.
(Actually the kids are GREAT, and welcome anytime) The renter allows them to stay in their old space if they want. They all get along fine. We frequently host international guests, they often come with extended family, and stay awhile. Plenty of space! (and fun / food / transportation / music for all).
We live with an 'Open House' policy... It is there for all to enjoy.
Empty, is not a term to describe our home, and certainly not our project / shop space!
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Otherwise, I have the same furniture but my kids talked me into a new TV a few months ago. I never had more than the necessary items (except when married).
!
(and feeds the pets!) That is more than I got out of the kids the last 10 yrs.
