why do people move back up north after moving down south? (New York: amusement park, high crime)
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My husband and I moved from Ohio to just outside of Greenville, SC about a year ago. I was excited, had a job lined up, a childhood friend nearby, and an apartment ready. We got here and were so unbearably disappointed. The apartment was comparable to project housing, at a ridiculous amount of money per month. The cockroaches are the size of hamsters, and it seems to phase no one, at least not the locals. The traffic is unbearable because the road system makes no sense to those of us northerners who grew up in towns mapped on a "grid system", where numbered streets go one direction and other streets go the other direction, and you have a "main street" running north and south intersected by another major street running east and west as the town's main crossroads. These streets run all over the place, with no rhyme or reason. and I85 doesn't really run north and south but rather more east and west. Very confusing. They do NOT like northerners. We are too fast talking and fast moving for them. I made everyone @ my office look bad b/c I come to work to do just that, WORK. Not play on the internet, text, make personal calls, carry on full conversations about my personal life with co-workers and patients, ignore patients waiting in the lobby, or take my time returning their calls about lab results, etc. They made fun of me for cleaning equipment between patients and at the end of the day. Gave me no proper training. Made fun of my Midwestern accent. Essentially got mad at me for doing what I was there to do. One of the doctors was very rude and unprofessional. I also had a pharmaceutical rep ask me if we "yankees" thought I-77, I-85, and I-95 were "one way streets". I didn't get it at first, but then he clarified and said he asked that b/c we come down here on those streets and never leave once we get here. I thought that was really rude and uncalled for. I have since found a much better job w/ a workplace full of transplants like myself. I love it, but I am still not happy in general. I do not want to continue to raise my family here. It is not all it's cracked up to be.
The schools are a mess. They just do things the way they've always done them, whether or not it makes sense or is safe for the kids. The school system is a county wide district, so when it snows in the mountains in the northern part of the county and they call off school for every school in the county. No wonder these are some of the dumbest schools in the nation. The local community college is a waste of time, money, and resources. I don't want to even get into that mess again. It was so poorly organized and run that I ended up dropping all of my classes. I'm downright embarrassed to say I even attended for 2 months.
These are just some of the reasons why I am looking into moving back North. I won't go back to Ohio, but I am definitely NOT staying in South Carolina. Next time I come back it will be for a vacation.
I grew up in Miami, Florida, lived in Orlando for about a year, and then moved on to Dallas, Texas for 17 years.
I moved to the mountains of North Carolina in 2001 and crossed the state line into the Georgia mountains in 2005. Next year, I am moving back into North Carolina to a small town south of Asheville, NC.
Growing up in Florida, no one had much to say about northerners living in Florida, because they had been coming to Florida for generations. They were part of the landscape.
Once you get to the rest of the southeast, it's a bit different. Northerners are somewhat of a newer development. They are common in the large cities, but the smaller towns are still getting used to them.
The term "Half Back" is often heard. I suppose you all know that a "Half Back" is a northerner who moved to Florida, decided it was too hot there, and decided to move half-way back by moving to North Carolina, Virginia, or northern Georgia and South Carolina. States in the mid-south have been invaded by northerners.
The mountains have been invaded by newcomers from everywhere. But the most common are from Florida and the northern states. The locals often hate Floridians for driving up the costs of real estate, complaining about things, being demanding, talking down to them, and constantly saying "We did it like this where we're from" or wanting to change the area to be like where they came from.
The Floridians tell the locals that the "Floridians" that do this stuff are not really from Florida. They are northern Half Backs who are giving Florida a bad name.
Needless to say, many locals hate Floridians and northerners. But they won't usually say this to your face because in the South, people are brought up to be super polite. Southerns can't stand people who are blunt, rude, or demanding. People up north can more easily shrug off a bad attitude, but southerners NEVER do.
My advice is to do your research, and then research some more.
I've met plenty of northerners in the mountains who love it and will never go back. My closest neighbors are a couple from New York. She lived in Manhattan and he grew up on Long Island. They lived in the Adirondacks for a while, but like the mountains here better. They go to a Catholic church that is full of New Yorkers.
However, the wife did offend the neighbors. Although our town has tons of newcomers, we live in a valley that is mostly populated with natives who have been here for generations. The NY wife complained to a neighbor about their dog barking and the neighbor told her that her family had lived there forever and that they and their dogs were there first in this rural valley. The NY husband told his wife "I told you not to say anything."
LOL
One thing I noticed on this thread is that a lot of people moved from very cold climates all the way down to Florida or the beaches of South Carolina or hot-as-hell Texas. They chose the very hottest places to relocate.
Look up places on Intellicast and look at the historical weather temperatures. If you know you can't stand heat, don't move to the hottest parts of the south.
I grew up in the heat but can't take it anymore. That's why I am in the mountains. Even in the mountains, you still have to consider the altitude to get reasonable summers. And the altitude varies considerably.
Oh, and about the roaches. Yes, they are going to be part of your life unless you locate to the mountains or perhaps in Virginia. People rely on exterminators and spray their houses on a regular basis to keep them away. We don't have them here in the mountains.
Education will vary by neighborhood. Make sure you get into a good one. It's not hard to research before making the move. There are also subtle differences in southern states. North Carolina is a bit more progressive in many ways. South Carolina is completely different.
Some of this comes down to knowing yourself. And hey, if you move down and don't like it, at least you tried. Obviously plenty of people move down and love it and others don't.
This past summer was one for the record books. It wasn't normal. Many places down here had record high temperatures. I know it was the hottest summer I ever spent here.
I agree! My brother and his wife live in Charlotte, NC. They have lived there for about 15 years. They warned me when we were talking about moving to SC. They said Charlotte would be a better starting off point for us. His words were that "anything south of Union County, NC is too rednecky". I thought he was being too uppity, as I like to give people/places the benefit of the doubt. But I found out the hard way that NC is definitely more progressive than SC. I personally don't like what is referred to as "politeness" in the south. It's the exact opposite of being polite. It's downright rude. If you don't like me, that's fine. No worries. I don't expect everyone to like me. But don't act like you like me and then talk smack about me behind my back, or make up complete lies, all the while "blessing my heart". THAT is what is rude, and very high schoolish. Not the kind of behavior I expected out of grown, "professional", "educated" adults. It is a culture shock to move here from the north. Moving to "non-resort" areas like Greenville, Spartanburg, or Columbia also differs greatly from moving to Hilton Head, Charleston, Myrtle Beach, etc. All I really knew from growing up was that I loved SC because we had vacationed in Hilton Head and Charleston every year since I was a tot. The heat isn't an issue for us, but I have to say I miss the snow just a wee bit. lol... We did research very thoroughly, but like others have pointed out, even if it looks great on paper, it still might not be the right fit. You will only know if it's the right place for you by going and checking it out for yourself, in person, and w/o the mentality of a tourist.
Don't get me wrong, Greenville has it's selling points, a great, revitalized downtown area with a wonderful park and river/waterfall area, Paris Mountain State Park, access to the mountains, Clemson University, 2.5 hours to the beach, etc... However, for my family the cons unfortunately outweigh the pros.
I gave some thought about moving to upstate South Carolina, just for the reason that real estate is so darn reasonable. But I just can't do it. It's just too conservative in all the wrong ways for me and SC lags behind in too many areas. I like a balance. I need proximity to Asheville without being in it. And I want to stay in the mountains for a million reasons.
I know Greenville has a great downtown. Actually looking at pictures of it, I thought of the term "Corporate Disney World". I think it's beautiful, but have an impression that it's a little sterile looking?
I think I'll go there for a day trip now and again, but that's it. Day trips to Charleston would be great too.
As far as the politeness factor, it probably bugs you because you're used to people telling it like it is. I do really like the southern politeness, but then I was sorta kinda brought up that way. I also think the men are more chivalrous. I don't know if one way is better; I think we all have a comfort zone.
I'm not really fussed about people disliking the places I like at all. It's all interesting to me. When it comes to the south, there are things I love and things I hate. But no matter what other regions I think of moving to, the downside is always too great for me.
I can't stand excessive cold or too many overcast gray skies. I also can't stand excessive heat. And since I don't want to be too far from my family in Florida, I guess the mountains are the best choice for me. Plus I really wanted to live in the most beautiful place I could, and they are beautiful.
I myself had a real culture shock when I came to live where I live now. First I lived near Murphy, NC and now I'm in Hiawassee, GA. But I'm glad I experienced something so different and it's helped me to know what I want and what I don't want.
Just moving to a town that's close to Asheville will be tremendous progress as far as I'm concerned. I'll have access to a lot more culture. I'm aiming for Brevard.
You might as well stay up North because the south is getting worse than the North thanks to so many people that moved there. Everything is over-crowded. Roads,stores,restaurants,schools,etc.
I moved to the South about 20 years ago. Land was cheap, most people were natives and outgoing, and the whole place had so much character. Within 10 years that all changed and I left. It is 10x worse now. From the Triangle to Atlanta, it is one big section of sprawl with no identity. The mountains and beaches have become so insanely expensive, overcrowded, and touristy chic. If you like cookie cutter, then VA, NC, SC, & GA is your kinda place.
Star--Yes, real estate is very reasonable in Upstate SC. Sr1234 IMO land is very cheap in SC compared to NE Ohio. However, this all comes with the price of your neighbors property looking like trash, thereby bringing your property value down. We have been house hunting since before we moved here. A darling house that would probably be perfect for our family usually gets X'd off our list because of the condition of the other houses in the neighborhood. It is never just one neighborhood or end of town we find this in, rather in every neighborhood, in multiple areas where we have looked (Easley, Simpsonville, Mauldin, Greenville *29607, 29609, 29615*, and Greer, just to name a few towns we have explored). And especially in neighborhoods we would not necessarily expect to find houses that aren't taken care of. Back home (NE Ohio) you generally do not see this kind of disregard for a home. It's one thing if the house is vacant and the bank is handling things, or if it is in a less than desirable area. However, these are neighborhoods with "newer" homes, in about the $150,000 price range. It's very disturbing to see the lack of pride people take in owning their homes. More often than not I see overgrown yards, shutters falling off or missing completely, broken garage doors, rusty garage doors, cable wires hanging out of windows, fences falling apart, trees not trimmed, mulch beds full of weeds. I just don't get it.
I hear the mountains are very nice, but I'm not sold on the idea of living there. My cousin went to Montreat College and loves it and misses being there tremendously. I hear it's great, but again, I just don't know if that's the right choice for us. I'm glad you have had a great experience there. Our next move is most likely going to be a temporary one, to the Charlotte area, pending my acceptance into my degree completion program. If we find somewhere we like while we are in Charlotte we may just stay. However, I think we will probably head back north after I graduate. And we will definitely head back north if I don't get accepted at all.
jblake78728, I like green grass and trees and water too. I can't say that I LOVE hot/humid, but I'm trying to decide if in the long run, it's better than cold/snowy/gray winter days. I've never experienced the hot-humid long-term.
I've only been to Vegas, but the dessert has never appealed to me either. I guess the economy makes it even worse. My sister's sister-in-law moved to Sante Fe and is finding it pretty depressing, even though she's really happy with her new husband and baby.
Areas that appeal to me in the Southeast are not the quickly overdeveloping commercial areas, esp not the huge cities. Maybe we will look more towards Alabama, LA, TN, Mississippi, rather than the Carolinas and GA. FL has always seemed set apart from the rest of the southeast and hasn't appealed to us as much either.
This is what I don't get about Northerners moving South. You have already turned North Carolina etc..., into the Northeast by moving there in droves. That isn't good enough, so now you want to do the same to Alabama and places like that. I am beyond words right now. Soon there will be no South left.
Well, I'm from NY and I currently live in SC. I HATE IT. If I could remove the cold, bitter winter from NY I'd move home in a snap. With my neurological pain and asthma issues brought on by the cold, unfortunately, that won't be happening.
The food prices are very high here. Produce prices are outrageous, and some things you are accustomed to finding easily, you can't even find.
The local governments are very corrupt. This includes the police, who get arrested daily here for all kinds of things including public nudity; the mayors who get multiple arrests for DUI, etc.
The schools are horrid. You won't see education anywhere close to what you're used to if you live in the Hudson Valley. (can't speak for anywhere else in NY, I don't know anything about the education there)
Race is definitely an issue, unfortunately.
There is absolutely no culture here. No decent museums, no true ethnic areas, etc.
Where I am in SC (Myrtle Beach area) there is nothing to do outside of toursity stuff. And golf.
Bugs/mosquitos the size of mini airplanes. NY cockroaches have nothing on the ones down here (I never even saw a cockroach til I moved here!!). They have their own names. Palmetto bugs.
3 summers ago we hit 115. Was brutal!! Someone I worked with died due to heat exhaustion that week.
I could go on, but I want to watch the last 5 mins of the Olympic hockey game
I am a native Southerner and I don't know where Northern transplants come up with these whoppers. And you wonder why a lot of you aren't liked down here.
I find it funny that you Northerners enjoy bashing us for crime rates and horrible schools when those are problems you find all over the country in areas that have high black populations. For you to bash us for those reasons and then in the same paragraph lecture us on our "racism" is pretty hateful if you ask me. Especially since you then go on to compare us to upstate New York where everything is paradise and everyone is white.
As to your point about "no culture".....well, that is obviously relative if you ask me.
I will never understand what goes on in the minds of most Northerners.
Star--Yes, real estate is very reasonable in Upstate SC. Sr1234 IMO land is very cheap in SC compared to NE Ohio. However, this all comes with the price of your neighbors property looking like trash, thereby bringing your property value down. We have been house hunting since before we moved here. A darling house that would probably be perfect for our family usually gets X'd off our list because of the condition of the other houses in the neighborhood. It is never just one neighborhood or end of town we find this in, rather in every neighborhood, in multiple areas where we have looked (Easley, Simpsonville, Mauldin, Greenville *29607, 29609, 29615*, and Greer, just to name a few towns we have explored). And especially in neighborhoods we would not necessarily expect to find houses that aren't taken care of. Back home (NE Ohio) you generally do not see this kind of disregard for a home. It's one thing if the house is vacant and the bank is handling things, or if it is in a less than desirable area. However, these are neighborhoods with "newer" homes, in about the $150,000 price range. It's very disturbing to see the lack of pride people take in owning their homes. More often than not I see overgrown yards, shutters falling off or missing completely, broken garage doors, rusty garage doors, cable wires hanging out of windows, fences falling apart, trees not trimmed, mulch beds full of weeds. I just don't get it.
I hear the mountains are very nice, but I'm not sold on the idea of living there. My cousin went to Montreat College and loves it and misses being there tremendously. I hear it's great, but again, I just don't know if that's the right choice for us. I'm glad you have had a great experience there. Our next move is most likely going to be a temporary one, to the Charlotte area, pending my acceptance into my degree completion program. If we find somewhere we like while we are in Charlotte we may just stay. However, I think we will probably head back north after I graduate. And we will definitely head back north if I don't get accepted at all.
After reading your posts that tend to trash the South based on experiences you have had in tiny segments of the region, I will be happy to help you pack. I am from the South. My ancestors were in Alabama since before the Confederacy. Outside of really poor white rural parts of the Deep South and really poor black rural and urban areas, I hardly see unkept homes and "shudders falling off of windows". Are you sure you didn't visit somewhere in the Third World? Doesn't sound like the South to me.
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