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Social status in America, as in every society, is complex...
Yes, the shades of meaning, expectations, and even interpretations of what's appropriate can be radically different. Just as I pointed out areas in which I see differences between working class and middle class, the contrast between middle and upper can be even more striking.
For example, I've heard that it's sometimes easier to mingle with the very wealthy because many of them, presumably, don't spend their energy trying to prove their status, and so, paradoxically, they may be more pleasant and natural to deal with than middle class status seekers. And the uber rich can also afford (quite literally!) to be eccentric and outrageous, which can make for a good time.
The problem in America is, the primary focus for many has been to continuously "one-up" their fellow citizen. Why do you think houses continuously got bigger even though our paychecks stagnated? The folly of our society is our collective ego. It really got out of hand, especially when Americans themselves thought themselves and our country superior to every other. That bred complacency instead of competitive drive. Now our kids suck at math, everyone is overweight, and much of the globe has achieved a competitive edge. So while everyone was busy remodeling their houses and trying to emulate a middle class lifestyle, it has continued to shrink, while growing in many other nations. Prosperity must be earned, no way around that, even if you're an American.
Social status in America, as in every society, is complex... it doesn't necessarily strongly correlate with money, let alone with possessions. However, it is precisely the accumulation of "stuff" that many people in the lower and middle classes regard as the path to upward mobility. This is a major contributor to why our middle class feels so strained and is so indebted.
Consider, for example, how odd it would be to regard having read Aristotle in the original Greek as being a mark of class; or to achieve a master-rating in chess; or to be able to pinpoint the national origin of the orchestra (and maybe even the conductor) from listening to a recording of a Brahms symphony. Such things, in the popular imagination, are regarded as recondite fripperies, the silly stuff of nerdy idleness.
Imagine a dinner-party held somewhere in America, where perhaps the food isn't particularly delectable and the diners serve themselves, but where the conversation seamlessly shifts from English to German to French. Would this be an "upper class" gathering, or a bunch of vain academics flaunting their useless sophistication? I assert that one's reaction to such a scene is itself a marker of class. Would one judge the quality of the gathering on whether or not servants are present? Then one is probably middle-class. What if the criterion is the quality of the beer? Probably lower middle class. And if by the quantity of beer? Certainly lower-class.
I grew up in a lower class town and went to school with gang members. I was not even in a middle-class town. I met beggars and prostitutes on the corner. There were needles on the ground. I wore hand-me-down clothes and talked to my friends about hating "rich people" and how we were the salt of the earth. They got high, drank Pabst, and stole from cars. There were a few drive-by shootings at high school parties. Many of my friends were pregnant at 15 or 16 and then dropped out of school. Some were grandmas before they were 35. Fathers were rarely around. I think maybe 5-10% of my high school went to college, usually community college. Others worked menial jobs or joined the navy. Many went to jail. Many aspired to someday own their own mobile home (they couldn't even dream of a McMansion).
But my mom was a teacher. I was given the complete Great Books set when I was 8 years old. I read Aristotle when I was 12 (not in Greek though). I had a teacher who successfully employed the Socratic method. I attended a writing class taught by Ray Bradbury. I played chess on a YMCA youth league, though did not receive master-rating. I did however play with a highly ranked Russian Master (he was a teaching volunteer). My father was a musician and (when he was around) introduced me to big band and the jazz greats. He played "Fundamentals of Musical Understanding" records for me and would ask me to identify instruments, like the oboe in Peter in the Wolf. I plucked away at his string bass and attended Ravinia music festivals. My father moved to a caribbean island and I picked up French and continued to study it in High School. I could converse in French and English while at the dinner table, and eventually studied in Paris.
The two above paragraphs explain two completely different aspects of my life that were occurring at the exact same time. I am sure many others have concurrently lived in 2 different social worlds like this. There are homeless people now living under overpasses who have PhD's. There are drop-outs running multi-million dollar companies. So what social class was I when I was a kid? Yes, social class in America is complex.
Paul Fussell wrote a great book about the subtle aspects of class determination, he observed correctly that various sub levels of class were found within the three classes that most think of when the subject comes up. This from Amazon regarding his book:
In Class Paul Fussell explodes the sacred American myth of social equality with eagle-eyed irreverence and iconoclastic wit. This bestselling, superbly researched, exquisitely observed guide to the signs, symbols, and customs of the American class system is always outrageously on the mark as Fussell shows us how our status is revealed by everything we do, say, and own. He describes the houses, objects, artifacts, speech, clothing styles, and intellectual proclivities of American classes from the top to the bottom and everybody -- you'll surely recognize yourself -- in between. Class is guaranteed to amuse and infuriate, whether your class is so high it's out of sight (literally) or you are, alas, a sinking victim of prole drift.
For another revealing look at how the different classes contribute to the stratified socio-political construct, William Domhoff's Who Rules America Now goes to some length to show the connection between class and power. Those who begin life in the moneyed families usually end up in the circles of power, as opposed to those who have a certain upward mobility but find the door closed at some point due to the lack of proper class credentials. However we view the complex notions of class one thing is certain, class IS a very real delineator and the dividing lines can't always be crossed by attaining more money.
During your childhood experience, heavy emphasis was placed on the following as regards parental expectations of your behavior and attitudes:
1. Personal Neatness and Cleanliness:
At home and wherever else you happened to find yourself. "Being poor is no excuse to be ugly, nasty and lazy" Soap and water is just about free" is the way it was put to me as a child.
2. Pride:
Be proud of where you come from. Be proud of your family name. Don't do anything to bring disgrace or shame to your reputation or family's reputation.
Also, Pull your own weight. Earn your keep. Be independent. Don't be lazy, be a good worker. Contribute. Don't beg for anything and if you do have to accept help, accept as small amount as you can for as short a time as you can.
Dealing With Other People:
1. Don't lie
2. Be a lady and demand a lady's respect
3. Do what you say you are going to do.
4. Pay your bills.
5. Don't talk behind a person's back; say it to their face
College:
"We can't afford college. Get yourself a trade and some work skills"
General Points:
"If you don't know how to close or fix it, you better not open it or break it!" (I mean ANYTHING)
"Make do with what you have"
"Put some money aside for a rainy day"
"Smoking, drinking and gambling are bad habits and a waste of money"
"Waste not, want not"
This is pretty much what came immediately to mind.
It's interesting to me that in the US, unlike the UK, people tend to avoid labeling themselves "working-class". Unless they were raised in extreme poverty or are Warren Buffett , Americans prefer the term "middle class". But having been raised in a blue-collar home, I've found there are some significant differences between my expectations and experiences in life when compared with my "middle-class" colleagues and friends.
Interestingly, even though my wife is a foreigner, I find she relates to many of these perspectives, as she also comes from a working-class background. Some shared traits/experiences I've noticed:
2) Work is seen as necessary drudgery, not a means to personal fulfillment. Unions are our only defense / don't cross a picket line. Satisfaction is found in hobbies, family, or weekend tasks around the house. College is OK if it leads to a job, but you'd better get a scholarship, and parents can't help you navigate the labyrinth of applications, SATs, tutoring, and financial aid. Reading is an OK escape, but don't do it too much. The TV is always on.
3) "Don't think you're better than other people." Mistrust of "pretense," "elitism," and "fancy stuff." What's familiar (sports teams, neighborhoods, religions, race) is good. For example, domestic beer>boxed wine>any foreign stuff (unless there's an ethnic connection, i.e., Guinness if you're Irish-American). Food should be cheap & plentiful; healthy eating, not smoking and taking care of yourself is weak.
I have never had a problem saying that I come from a working class background. My mother was a high school dropout and worked as a secretary, then later in life as an HVAC tech. My father was in the Air Force for 32 years.
I can relate to these two specifically. As a child, I was an early reader and I was reading on my own around age 4. I read for pleasure all the time. Both of my parents, even my father who was a 'reader' as well, would scold me for always having my "nose in a book" and would urge me to do something "normal". My mother used to even say to me "Why don't you watch some TV instead?"
As I got older, I made friends who were from middle and upper middle class backgrounds and I remember my mother making snarky comments to me about my interest in what she called "yuppie" food (whole coffee beans instead of Folger's, brie and other different cheeses, etc.
Now, she often accuses me of thinking I am "so smart" and claiming to not understand what I am talking about if I refer to something happening in one of my college classes. Even though she say she is very proud of me for going to college, there definitely seems to be a heavier value put on being street smart, having practical "smarts", and so on. I am 41 and about to finish my 1st Bachelor's degree, and she still thinks I should have gone to trade school instead and thinks four years of school is "awful".
Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Josef the Chewable
Yes, the shades of meaning, expectations, and even interpretations of what's appropriate can be radically different. Just as I pointed out areas in which I see differences between working class and middle class, the contrast between middle and upper can be even more striking.
For example, I've heard that it's sometimes easier to mingle with the very wealthy because many of them, presumably, don't spend their energy trying to prove their status, and so, paradoxically, they may be more pleasant and natural to deal with than middle class status seekers. And the uber rich can also afford (quite literally!) to be eccentric and outrageous, which can make for a good time.
I've experienced this as well. My experiences with one person in particular who comes from immense wealth have been like this, in contrast to my experiences with my ex-mother in law. My ex MIL is upper middle class and quite frankly, a snob. She is very concerned about appearances and quick to judge anyone different. She likes to slip little things into casual conversation regarding what the maid did or how she just bought such and such at this boutique. The one uber wealthy guy I have known for years is someone who has friends from varying "classes", doesn't care what you are wearing or what you drive, and is rather eccentric himself. He's a khakis and t-shirts kind of guy and for years drove a beat up old Ford Econoline van even though the house he grew up in spans four city blocks, including the tennis courts and pools and servants quarters (and that's just the house "in town"). If you met him, you'd probably have no idea he was rich, at least not at first. I must say though that he has never worked, and has always had a trust fund to support his lifestyle. Despite his more humble appearances he still travels, collects expensive things, and lives a life of complete freedom due to money. He is rather clueless about how the "other half" lives. I was his roommate for a while and remember very well how, even though we separated our food in the fridge, he'd let his friends come over and eat all my food and couldn't understand why I was mad (I was working for minimum wage). He has some Pollyanna attitudes as a result of having never wanted for anything.
It's interesting to me that in the US, unlike the UK, people tend to avoid labeling themselves "working-class". Unless they were raised in extreme poverty or are Warren Buffett , Americans prefer the term "middle class". But having been raised in a blue-collar home, I've found there are some significant differences between my expectations and experiences in life when compared with my "middle-class" colleagues and friends.
Interestingly, even though my wife is a foreigner, I find she relates to many of these perspectives, as she also comes from a working-class background. Some shared traits/experiences I've noticed:
1) Very little education in how to use/create wealth. Frugal by necessity, but sometimes spendthrifts at payday. No sense of how to invest wisely. Generous, literally, to a fault (for example, by unconditionally lending money to relatives and friends). A lot of time spent visualizing being rich, or hatching hare-brained schemes/playing the lottery, etc.
2) Work is seen as necessary drudgery, not a means to personal fulfillment. Unions are our only defense / don't cross a picket line. Satisfaction is found in hobbies, family, or weekend tasks around the house. College is OK if it leads to a job, but you'd better get a scholarship, and parents can't help you navigate the labyrinth of applications, SATs, tutoring, and financial aid. Reading is an OK escape, but don't do it too much. The TV is always on.
3) "Don't think you're better than other people." Mistrust of "pretense," "elitism," and "fancy stuff." What's familiar (sports teams, neighborhoods, religions, race) is good. For example, domestic beer>boxed wine>any foreign stuff (unless there's an ethnic connection, i.e., Guinness if you're Irish-American). Food should be cheap & plentiful; healthy eating, not smoking and taking care of yourself is weak.
4) Not knowing "the Code." Tendency to over/under dress for the occasion, speak too frankly among wealthier people.
I don't encourage a class warfare mentality, nor do I romanticize growing up working class, but I find the differences interesting. Although I'm probably a "middle class latte-drinker" now , I'm sure I've internalized some of the values I was raised with.
What are your "growing up working-class" experiences?
There are elements of both truth and extreme condescension in this.
1) The topics of wealth creation, and perhaps more importantly, wealth retention, are not taught in schools, where most education of the middle class and under takes place. Wealthy parents tend to teach their children sound financial advice, and because they have money to manage, they have gained some insight into it.
I remember being taught Shakespeare, Chaucer, and the classics, but never how to manage a budget. As I've aged, I've had to learn how to adjust my spending in accordance with my income, and to be honest, sometimes I've fallen flat on my face. I've always had an interest in financial markets and have made some money buying physical gold/silver, buying/selling stocks, etc, but I've never had enough capital to live off of it. Through lots of research, I have very rarely lost any significant amount of money.
I don't know anyone who has the "hare-brained" schemes of playing the lottery and gets into the "get rich quick" stuff because they are working class. I'm not sure compulsive gambling can be defined along class lines.
I do semi-agree on the lending money to relatives. It's been my experience that working class will lend money out carelessly, whereas someone wealthier will be more judicious, or will simply gift it. Wealthier people seem to not actually lend to family members.
2) I would say there is a strong correlation between wealth and love for one's profession. After all, those who enjoy what they do are likely to become very good at it, and that can generate wealth. If your income is very low, it's unlikely that you'll be satisfied, and you're probably not working in occupation that could be seen as rewarding.
Unions are frowned upon, at least here in the working class, rural South. However, there is just as much, if not more, distrust of companies.
In many working class communities, college is not viewed as necessary for the jobs available, or even as beneficial. Growing up in Appalachia, I can tell you college was not high on the priorities list of many of my peers, but to some extent, it's a reasonable point of view. There are very few jobs where I live where a college education is required or beneficial. There is some reasonably well-founded hesitation or even resentment toward education where I'm from.
3) The domestic beer and food being "cheap and plentiful" is insulting. You're conjuring up images of some poor trash devouring the pizzas, McDonald's, Cokes, and Natural Light, absolutely loving it and being too stupid to realize better alternatives . There are people in the working class like this, but it's a nasty, ugly stereotype, and shouldn't be applied with such a broad brush. There are probably far more people in the working class that would prefer to eat healthier should their budgets allow it than people like the former.
Most people of any class tend to stick with what is comfortable regarding race, religion, etc. Some people modify their views, but very few of any class really do a 180 from how they were raised.
4) This seems to be code for the working class lack decorum. Of course there are people in the working class who lack decorum, but it's not everyone.
This post peddles nearly every negative stereotype of the working class I can think of. Poor, fat, uneducated, ignorant, etc. Way to go.
At home and wherever else you happened to find yourself. "Being poor is no excuse to be ugly, nasty and lazy" Soap and water is just about free" is the way it was put to me as a child.
2. Pride:
Be proud of where you come from. Be proud of your family name. Don't do anything to bring disgrace or shame to your reputation or family's reputation.
Also, Pull your own weight. Earn your keep. Be independent. Don't be lazy, be a good worker. Contribute. Don't beg for anything and if you do have to accept help, accept as small amount as you can for as short a time as you can.
Dealing With Other People:
1. Don't lie
2. Be a lady and demand a lady's respect
3. Do what you say you are going to do.
4. Pay your bills.
5. Don't talk behind a person's back; say it to their face
College:
"We can't afford college. Get yourself a trade and some work skills"
General Points:
"If you don't know how to close or fix it, you better not open it or break it!" (I mean ANYTHING)
"Make do with what you have"
"Put some money aside for a rainy day"
"Smoking, drinking and gambling are bad habits and a waste of money"
"Waste not, want not"
A lot of this sounds familiar, but just common sense, no? Is this somehow specific to blue collar/working class people? A lot sounds familiar, yes, except the college part.
I got two POVs from my parents, who were both working class: Ma (who was not an American) thought that was for the elite and that I should learn a trade and then...maybe..go to college Dad & Grandad (who came from an immigrant family): believed college was the road to upward mobility and you were going to college no matter what.
Politicans happily use this tendency of the American working class to label themselves as middle class. They promise this, that and more to "the middle class" knowing that 90% of the population thinks they are.... the middle class!
A lot of this sounds familiar, but just common sense, no? Is this somehow specific to blue collar/working class people? A lot sounds familiar, yes, except the college part.
I got two POVs from my parents, who were both working class: Ma (who was not an American) thought that was for the elite and that I should learn a trade and then...maybe..go to college Dad & Grandad (who came from an immigrant family): believed college was the road to upward mobility and you were going to college no matter what.
The point I made with my post was that even though I grew up in a working class culture without wealth or education, the children were taught manners, respect and traits that would help them become productive citizens and desirable marriage partners, and....these things I mention are not specific to those who grew up with wealth and educational opportunities.
And if it is common sense as you say, why aren't these types of traits more visible in the youth of today? Answer: because they are no longer being taught at home by the people who raise them.
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, Americans prefer the term "middle class". But having been raised in a blue-collar home, I've found there are some significant differences between my expectations and experiences in life when compared with my "middle-class" colleagues and friends. 
, I'm sure I've internalized some of the values I was raised with.
