Do men have a responsibility to make women feel safe?

[JBT1980]

Originally Posted by Sonic_Spork

I prefer to avoid anyone who exhibits bullying behaviors regardless of their stature.

The husband that I mindfully chose, when I had the wherewithal to make an intelligent choice about it as a mature adult, is...5'7"? I think? He is a peaceful and non violent man. He has nothing to prove to anyone, does not engage in tough guy posturing, does not bully anyone, and has excellent self control. He also does not leap to get defensive and prickly and fight over nothing. He's great.

But the thing is, if you go around behaving badly, people are likely to extend their negative judgment of you beyond your acts and into your appearance as well. If I know an overweight person who is kind and sweet and awesome, I will defend them ferociously against anyone who tries to insult their appearance. But if someone is a mean, nasty, horrible individual by their words and actions, and someone mocks their appearance, I am far less likely to defend them and may even find it funny. I think that's a pretty common human thing, though I know a lot of very politically correct types who are trying to do away with all body shaming regardless. Maybe that's a good move.

But there really is a difference between sticking up for yourself, and being a jerk or a bully. Regardless of how you're built.

Oh sure it doesn’t give you cart Blanche to be an a s s at all and mistreat people. My only problem is then a lot of people end up saying it’s all or most short men who are like that and is a referendum on short men when it happens but with bigger guys or any other group it’s never a referendum on all or most of them if they F up like it is with a jerk who is short. Short Men are the only group whos physical trait gets them lumped in as one when there is a bad apple. You don’t see people judging all fat people as bad or tall men or women.

I also don’t think it’s always because of size why a short guy may abusive or agressive

It could be because he was abused at home and that’s what he knows or he’s just a jerk because some people are just jerks. It doesn’t always have to have something to do with his size.

But I get it short is nearly a universally unattractive trait on men and tall is a universally attractive trait and attractive people will always get a longer rope to make mistakes and act poorly.

Most women are probably lukewarm on dating short men and if they give it a shot they’re more likely to say it’s not worth it if she dates an agressive short man and will blame his behavior on his height because she wasn’t that into it to begin with where some tall good looking dude who mistreats her she’s not gonna swear of all tall classically handsome men because of any bad experiences