How do I decide between two girls? (dating, married, women)
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Roughly a year ago, I asked out a girl (We'll simply call her "Girl 1" who's in my social circle and she rejected me and claimed that she had just gotten out of a relationship and just wanted some time for herself before jumping into dating again. I respected her decision and despite some slight awkwardness, we've still remained friends and seen each other regularly for the past year. But just yesterday, she approached me and asked me if I was still interested in going out. What should be a simple case of me accepting and being happy that she came back to me turned into me telling her that I just need some time to think things through. I kept emphasizing to her that I genuinely need some time to think and that I'm not rejecting her by any stretch of the imagination. She seemed to be receptive of that.
So what is it that I need to think through exactly? There's a co-worker of mine (Girl 2) who I've also developed a crush on. I'm 99% certain that she has a crush on me as well and I've only not approached her with a date request simply because we're co-workers. But I've heard that she's on the hunt for a new job and my plan has been to ask her out once she's officially leaving this job. I've spent the past couple of months flirting with her and she's been flirting right back. But Girl 1 asking me out has now thrown a wrench in things and I genuinely don't know what to do. I have feelings for both of these girls, but I obviously can't have both.
This may seem simple for some, but here's my problem. If I choose Girl 1 and Girl 2 finds out, then she'll probably feel like I lead her on, what with all of the flirting and signs of interest that I've been giving her. I don't want that to be the case. But there's also a small part of me that thinks that Girl 1 already had her chance with me last year and she rejected me, meaning that we should both probably just move on to other people. But I'm also keeping in mind that I'm a socially awkward introvert who struggles with talking to women in a more than platonic manner. Asking out Girl 1 last year was a big struggle for me and I already know that I'm going to struggle with asking out Girl 2, meaning that I should probably just go out with Girl 1 since she's the one making it easy by asking me out.
I know that I'm probably overthinking the crap out of this, but I genuinely have so many thoughts racing in my head over this. What do you think that I should do?
You do realize you can date someone without it being a commitment or immediately becoming a couple, right?
You could go on a date with G1 or G2 and discover three deal breakers on the first date. Or they could decide you aren't what they want for a BF. That's why people date before becoming couples or getting married or living together.
Why not go up to G2 and say to her that you hear she is hunting for a new job, and is it true? If she says she is looking for a new job ask her out then instead of waiting.
One thing that comes to my mind is this.....if one of these young women doesn't appeal a lot more to you than the other you might want to look for G number 3 instead of settling. Third times the charm and all that.
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What happened to asking out the woman that had put in her notice? I read your handle history. That was last month. Did you chicken out or what?
That's Girl 2. She had put in her notice, but something happened at the new job that caused her to not get it after all and she's had to rescind her notice for the time being.
Date girl one because you shouldn’t date someone you work with. That way you’ll know how you feel about girl one. If it doesn’t work out, there’s girl two for later.
This may seem simple for some, but here's my problem. If I choose Girl 1 and Girl 2 finds out, then she'll probably feel like I lead her on, what with all of the flirting and signs of interest that I've been giving her. I don't want that to be the case.
If G2 finds out you’re going out with G1, you are sharing way too much of your personal life at work.
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