Your thoughts on verbal abuse incident, and my suspicious nature.

[wasel]

Originally Posted by taz60

This is long...


I went outside and after a few minutes I saw him walking back from the open area in front of us. He wore a shirt and his jockeys only. As he walked toward our site, his hand was in his underpants, scratching.

I felt horrified. It was dark, people were sleeping and they were not in the immediate area. But there is a much better chance of someone seeing him out there than if he had gone behind our site.

Let me add that he is a felon -a sex offender for molesting a minor. (He said he was framed).

He got very defensive immediately and asked why I had a problem with it. He said he walked out about 40 feet away.

I said out in the open? That is pervert behavior. He started yelling F*** you, b**** and mocking me for being worried. He probably yelled it at least 10 times. I began gathering my things to leave and he kept baiting me. Saying things like 'watch out for perverts.' A few hours later he did text an apology.

Is his anger justified? It was so instant and intense. Alcohol may have helped the anger. My problem is i am suspicious by nature and I know that gets to him. Usually I am not so blunt, but to me the behavior was so weird. What are your thoughts? Thank you.

I can't wrap my head around the fact that you consider yourself a suspicious person by nature but yet you agreed to a relationship with a child molester who SAYS he was framed but do you really know the facts?
If you really were a suspicious person you would have not given him the benefit of the doubt.

Originally Posted by clevergirl67

I should ask if your behavior is normal. Because most anyone would know not to date someone who is a molester (framed - yeah right), not to mention go back to them after they've proven they were abusive.

Exactly.

[Archaic]

Originally Posted by wasel

I can't wrap my head around the fact that you consider yourself a suspicious person by nature but yet you agreed to a relationship with a child molester who SAYS he was framed but do you really know the facts?
If you really were a suspicious person you would have not given him the benefit of the doubt.

This is what I was thinking.


OP, you are NOT suspicious ENOUGH.

[Bootsamillion]

Originally Posted by taz60

This is long...

I am F 63. SO is 69. First relationship for both us in 20 plus years.

I am divorced and had several long term relationships. But for the past 20 years I avoided relationships.

I have trust issues from past relationships and childhood mental and physical abuse.

My SO and I have been together for 1 ½ years with a two month break up and a 3 day break up.

Both break ups were after he was drunk and something I said would trigger him. He would rage and belittle me and call me names like c*** and b***h. Otherwise, we generally get along and are compatible in many ways.

Currently we are camping in a place with lots of open space. There are other people camping, but not too near by.When SO needs to pee, he usually goes in an area behind our campsite with lots of bushes and privacy. Last night I woke up at 3 am and he wasn't around.

I went outside and after a few minutes I saw him walking back from the open area in front of us. He wore a shirt and his jockeys only. As he walked toward our site, his hand was in his underpants, scratching.

I felt horrified. It was dark, people were sleeping and they were not in the immediate area. But there is a much better chance of someone seeing him out there than if he had gone behind our site.

Let me add that he is a felon -a sex offender for molesting a minor. (He said he was framed).

He got very defensive immediately and asked why I had a problem with it. He said he walked out about 40 feet away.

I said out in the open? That is pervert behavior. He started yelling F*** you, b**** and mocking me for being worried. He probably yelled it at least 10 times. I began gathering my things to leave and he kept baiting me. Saying things like 'watch out for perverts.' A few hours later he did text an apology.

Is his anger justified? It was so instant and intense. Alcohol may have helped the anger. My problem is i am suspicious by nature and I know that gets to him. Usually I am not so blunt, but to me the behavior was so weird. What are your thoughts? Thank you.

You must be color blind girl! HUGE RED FLAGS waving in the wind here! Let's see....
He was convicted of being a child molester
He is abusive to you (verbal and I bet he's physically abusing you too)
He refuses to use a bathroom facility where he's staying and prefers to go outside and pee where others might see him. That's just disrespectful to everyone else, but all men like to "Pee off the porch".

It is not OK for a man to scream at you or cuss you. I think you are codependent with this guy and find it hard to leave because you don't want to be alone. You know you aren't happy but you just put up with it. This guy sounds like the jerk of all jerks and use your gut feeling to direct you in the way you need to go. You should break things off with him and just be single a little while longer. You will eventually find someone but not until you have healed from this and from the reason that keeps you with this guy. Get counseling. Learn why you allow this behavior. Learn to love yourself and respect yourself because if you don't respect yourself, nobody else EVER will. This guy disrespects the hell out of you all the time. I'd dust his junky ass off and walk off happy.