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we all have seen people who are in relationship and wondering how the heck did that person are in relationship "he or she is such an ass-o"
I see couples in public where they never even talked to each other or looked at each other and just on their phone.
Or worse treat their significant badly out in public.
I am sure I am not alone on this . I am not going to date someone until I know I am 100% happy with them in one way or another, well maybe not 100 but 90% for sure. It would be sad but I know I will be happier being single than to settle for someone that I am not happy with.
I have a hard time with your English. You see couples in public and know they never TALKED to each other or looked at each other or just on their phone?
we all have seen people who are in relationship and wondering how the heck did that person are in relationship "he or she is such an ass-o"
I see couples in public where they never even talked to each other or looked at each other and just on their phone.
Or worse treat their significant badly out in public.
I am sure I am not alone on this . I am not going to date someone until I know I am 100% happy with them in one way or another, well maybe not 100 but 90% for sure. It would be sad but I know I will be happier being single than to settle for someone that I am not happy with.
People change/evolve over time.
We are often blinded to other's "faults" in the beginning when things are new and we are infatuated.
Sometimes direct events and/or indirect events change the way we feel about a person.
These are some reasons why one may think how in the heck did I get here, why am I with this person.
I dont think anyone can know 100% or 90% that they will be happy with their person 2-5-10 years down the road.
Some just have to be in a relationship, any relationship. My sister was one of those.
I also think attitudes and what one will put up with change as one gets older and gains more experience. I have been at that point for some time now. I have been without a mate for I guess over 5 years now and have no desire to get entangled again.
People change/evolve over time.
We are often blinded to other's "faults" in the beginning when things are new and we are infatuated.
Sometimes direct events and/or indirect events change the way we feel about a person.
These are some reasons why one may think how in the heck did I get here, why am I with this person.
I dont think anyone can know 100% or 90% that they will be happy with their person 2-5-10 years down the road.
.
This!!!!
And not even blinded in the beginning. People show their best behavior for a while, then they get comfortable and show their real self. Now they are suddenly showing all these flaws they were hiding before. At that time, significant time has passed, maybe living together, maybe married, maybe there is a child involved. Or they just have nothing to say to each other anymore. When you spend so much time together, you run out of topics. I always envy couples who still have lots of engaging conversations after being together for years.
Then people stay together out of convenience. It is easier to put up with bad flaws than dividing stuff, moving out and paying 100% of living expenses.
And of course there is always hope. Hope that it will get better.
I am not going to date someone until I know I am 100% happy with them in one way or another, well maybe not 100 but 90% for sure.
This is going to be a problem. You will never be 100% happy with anyone... no one is perfect.
Even life itself is never going to be 100% happy all the time. No one but YOU and only you can be happy. I've seen this in people who continuously jump from one relationship to another sabotaging great opportunities along the way. They are expecting their partner to make them happy. They jump ship in the first sign of unhappiness to the next person.. and the next... and the next.
Perfectionism is the killer of success and happiness.
Seek satisfaction in life not happiness. Happiness comes and goes... and comes and goes... Satisfaction can carry you through the toughest of times and helps you appreciate the happiest.
Many of them were probably close once, back when, and really for all anyone knows a lot of them still might be.
They might've been talking all morng already before you saw them, or for 3 days straight at home or who knows what.
And now they're just out somewhere no need for anything.Just sayin as a couple its not unusual at all to just drift off into your own worlds but together.
Obviously not all of them and things you say yeah seems pretty common to but you just never know what's been going on before that with others. Couples can form a real peace to there's no need to be in ea others face 24 7.
Just sayin ya never do know a moment in time can sometimes be very deceiving bc that's all it was.
But myself nope, l've never gone into a relationship just to not be alone. lf that's all it could offer me then l wouldn't have lasted 5mins in it anyway.
All sorts of views on the value of relationships. Some people's main goal is to find someone to build a life and family with. Those people might get in to a relationship not to avoid being alone specifically but because they are reaching a point in their life where they are ready for that next step and they need someone else to go on that journey with. Other people believe you should prepare yourself to live a life of independence and if you're lucky enough to find a person who can accompany you on that journey without sacrificing that independence then great, but it's not necessary. Those are the types who are going to have the highest standards and to be the most likely to decide nobody really fits the bill, and that's okay. Other people see a relationship as a form of validation and those are the types who will get into a relationship to not be alone.
And then of course there are many people who might lean towards one of those viewpoints but life circumstances steer them towards another and they adjust their expectations accordingly.
A number of divorced or widowed men quickly find another partner, sometimes very fast. Either the universe is giving them fantastic luck or they really don't want to be alone.
While different people have different motives to be in relationships, honesty and openness is important. Partners need to be on the same page.
Yes, of course. Have you not read the threads here, for one? So many people who hate their relationships or significant others yet are too afraid of being alone to leave. Or people who have a thing for someone completely inappropriate or available, yet put all their eggs in that basket because they think there are no other fish in the sea.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Threestep2
I have a hard time with your English. You see couples in public and know they never TALKED to each other or looked at each other or just on their phone?
And, of course, maybe they've been together and talking/interacting with each other all day. But they'll be judged if they do something else for five minutes (especially if it involves electronics; I've never seen this type of exasperation with people who may be together but, say, reading the newspaper separately, but if they're using their phone for some reason, it's the end of the world).
Frankly, I think it's a sign of a good relationship if you can have comfortable silences without feeling the need to talk constantly, or if you just like being together even when doing other things. Not to mention, most people think it's healthy in relationships to not be glued to each other's hip 24/7.
we all have seen people who are in relationship and wondering how the heck did that person are in relationship "he or she is such an ass-o"
I see couples in public where they never even talked to each other or looked at each other and just on their phone.
Or worse treat their significant badly out in public.
I am sure I am not alone on this . I am not going to date someone until I know I am 100% happy with them in one way or another, well maybe not 100 but 90% for sure. It would be sad but I know I will be happier being single than to settle for someone that I am not happy with.
Have fun with that
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