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She told me she wants us to remain friends.
She would like us to continue speaking to each other and having sex.
She also said she would like us to stay exclusive. She wants the freedom of hanging out with her friends whenever guy and girl.
Maybe I should do this and keep my options open?
Kinda sounds like that's what she is doing. Or am I taking this wrong?
Yes, sounds like she wants you to stay exclusive while she keeps her options open.
lmao - just broke up with her right now. I told her I was looking for someone proud to call me their boyfriend. That I would be dating other people and that she can always let me know if she changes her mind. She stormed off angry, did not want to communicate. I can tell it's for the better. She was upset that I changed my mind on yesterdays agreement.
Did you get one more "benefit" in before you gave her the news?
That's what my question was addressing. You asked if you should do her FWB thing, and keep your options open. But the terms she spelled out was no options but her. So if you want the FWB, you'd have to pretend to be exclusive, which would be being dishonest. Could even involve lying at some point. Not worth it. It sounds like she wants to control you while having freedoms herself that she'd deny you.
well she was ok with us bieng fwb , talking, bieng friends. She was ok with us not being exclusive. But I love her and want to keep dating her. The last time we were talking she was really affectionate and hugging and kissing me, this was 2 days ago. I ended the relationship yesterday, I told her I cared to much to be freinds with benifits. I want someone proud to call me their boyfriend. She said that she thought it was bull****, that I agreed to everything yesterday. She was happy with that arrangement. I told her I would be dating other people and if she every changes her mind she can let me know.
BRAVO, OP! Well done! You stuck up for yourself, and were very clear in spelling out your parameters in a dignified manner. Very impressive. And her reaction tells you everything you need to know about what kind of a person she is: not your type.
Best wishes in your future search! You deserve to have your wishes fulfilled.
Thank you. I felt proud of myself yesterday for standing up for myself. I am really hurt today though, and i miss her.
FWB means keeping your options open with other people. The benefits would end as soon as she found someone she perceived as better. Had you found someone else she would have been angry about that, too. She's not a reasonable or emotionally mature person. If she changes her mind about FWB and wants to get
back together.... just say No thank you.
yea she also said, she did not just want sex. that she wanted us to be friends and talk.
Yea she is not mature, its kinda cruel to me.
I know she is not good for me. but i feel so emotionnaly addicted. I would like to make it work.
I 100% believe Im probably the best she could do, which is the worst part.
I am handsome, have a great job/career, and i was ok with supporting her and her son (4 years old)
I am handsome, have a great job/career, and i was ok with supporting her and her son (4 years old)
Oh okay, that explains a lot of her thinking. You've been supporting her and her son?
She wants to keep you on the tow with the promise of sex and affection but you continuing to support her and her son is the real goal. Doesn't look like that's happening, that's why she's mad.
She was foolish to compromise a relationship that was seemingly stable and certainly beneficial to her so she could "get over her ex" - oh and also hang with her girl and guy friends whenever she wanted. Mm hmm.
And in doing so, she did you a favor aalmanzar.
When we feel addicted to someone, that's an unhealthy relationship dynamic. I felt that way once and it ended in a predictable way as they most often do. I told myself, never again.
Guess some of us have to go through that once though. But once is enough.
haha, i dont have any kids, so i wanted to give it a try. im 31.
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