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I'm a female in my late 20s. I work for a fortune 500 company and have had some great growth within my career. I am in an 'acting' role and am to officially get my promotion on 6 months. I will be one of the youngest within this particular role and am quite proud of where I am at.
In the last month, my husband and I have decided to split. He's moved across the country and already stopped wearing his ring. He is also quite successful and well versed in the business world. He's told me that he thinks I should continue to wear my ring to work until I get my promotion and says that by taking it off it can hurt my career. I did have to do quite a bit to prove that I am ready for this role as I am not only young, but also look it. This has been a barrier for me in the past. I obviously have proven myself based on results and leadership, and want to ensure I don't hurt that.
Do you think that me being divorced/ single will hurt me career wise? Obviously my close friends and my team know what is going on, but not necessarily HR or my senior management.
I have never taken a woman's (or man's) marital status into account when making hiring, firing or promotional decisions. I cannot imagine why a married woman would be better for a position.
Take the ring off if you want. Do the common sense things, and when you start to date, keep it away from the job. Tell your soon to be ex that he needs to stop trying to make decisions for you if you are getting divorced,
You could use it to your advantage because now you can say you are even more focused and dedicated to your job because you don't have a major domestic distraction/obligation at home.
That makes no sense. If taking it off will hurt your career, are you supposed to wear it forever?
I have heard all type of theories about women wearing wedding rings, even if they are single. One theory is that a potential boss will see the ring, assume you have a family, and will offer you a job or a higher salary because they assume you have more responsibilities.
That doesn't make any sense. If anything, being single is actually seen as being better since you have zero commitments/responsibilities outside of your job. I work in Finance, I am divorced and i have never been passed by for promotion due to my marital status, I am 30.
Well you never know. Being divorced so young can be a red flag to many. It could be seen as a sign of instability. Especially in a work world where you are often judged and promoted based on how attractive you are, or what race you are! Although there is a small chance it could negatively affect your career, I really don't think it would unless you report to the wrong person.
I think everyone has logical points. And that's where the issue lies - its all in the eye of the beholder. In this case, what the OP wants to know is how wearing (or not wearing) the ring will be perceived by her peers/executives. And one would need to be clairvoyant to answer that question.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jman07
Well you never know. Being divorced so young can be a red flag to many. It could be seen as a sign of instability. Especially in a work world where you are often judged and promoted based on how attractive you are, or what race you are! Although there is a small chance it could negatively affect your career, I really don't think it would unless you report to the wrong person.
i agree. While no employer should base a hiring decision on marital status, they often do. For men, being married shows more responsibility and maturity. For women it can be seen as a red flag because of the likely future time off to have kids. In your case, since they already know you as married, removal of the ring signaling the divorce could have a negative affect, especially if yo have kids, though it sounds like you don't? You know your corporate culture, we don't. Gauge what you know about your superiors/HR from past experience and make your best guess as to which way to go. There's really no way to know for sure.
I would keep wearing it for awhile for this reason - people at work are more likely to notice the absence of a ring if they are used to seeing you wear it. This in turn will provoke the inevitable questions which may bring out emotional responses at this point and perhaps make upper management feel you can't possibly be very focused on your job. When you do take it off at a much later date you can honestly say you split some time ago and your lack of emotion over it will send a positive message that your focus is right where it should be at work.
I don't think being married or unmarried conveys either a sense of responsibility or a lack of it. No competent manager would take that into account when making hiring/firing or promotion decisions.
I think you should take it off because it's a more honest statement about where you are in life. Besides, if your coworkers already know--then it's likely everyone does or will eventually.
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