Corporate words/catch-phrases/etc that you hate (percentage, owner, corporations)

[stan4]

Brainstorm.
Shift paradigms.

[geekychick]

provides measurable business impact
strategic direction and solution selection
provide a strong foundation based on proven best practices
strategic cptimization

When I see these on a resume.. i just want to PUKE....

[Squirl]

Originally Posted by tofurkey

You're fired!

Corporate phases for that: Reduction in Force; termination of your services; immediate discharge from your employment relationship; separation from our workforce and payroll

*As a former corp HR'r we never said Your Fired!

[Gerrygal]

"Team Player" (Translation: It's OUR way or the highway).
"Not a fit for the job" (Translation: We don't need you anymore).

[RogueMom]

Sick of service industries harping on about how "Customer Service" focused they are, when their practices blatantly show that they are anything BUT.

[Tober138]

Originally Posted by andywire

Everybody knows extra motivated white collar workers just use these words to feel important, and make their job seem more important.

[jeffdoorgunner]

want the construction blue collar take on it.............
back in the 80's when jobs were getting scarce,my supervisor told me I was lucky I had a job...........
I told him your lucky I work here...................

[SOON2BNSURPRISE]

It took me a while to learn the metric system as a kid. Now I have to learn about metrics in the work force.

We also use a balanced scorecard around here. Balanced with what? lol

[mkmb]

"Corporations are people." Mitt Romney

[buckeyenative01]

"Measurable outcomes"

"Strategic planning"

I hear this one a lot in the criminal justice field: "Evidence-based practices"

"Facilitating connectivity" (thanks, MST3K )