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I have a 33 year old son suffering from depression, anxiety and high blood pressure. he's on medication for all three but has a dependency problem.
he's been through a 30 day rehab (detox) program for alchohol about 6 months ago and is still struggling with that and now with the medication prescribed - I'm worred and having to deal with it every day.
he lives at home with me - a single Mom - who is struggling to keep things afloat financially - (401K, a small savings, equity in home, etc.)
I provide the roof over his head, food to eat and now health insurance. He has no job, no car and 2 DUIs (no license for the next 12 months). I did buy him a bike just recently and explained that a job of any sorts is better than no job and a bike is better than walking! After 5 weeks, still no effort to get out of the house on his part!
Does anyone know of a program for young adults that he might qualify for? I'm desperately seeking help for him as well as myself! I don't know how much longer I can keep this up! He's bee like this for over a year now!
We live in Alabama, but programs from anywhere would be appreciated.
I have a 33 year old son suffering from depression, anxiety and high blood pressure. he's on medication for all three but has a dependency problem.
he's been through a 30 day rehab (detox) program for alchohol about 6 months ago and is still struggling with that and now with the medication prescribed - I'm worred and having to deal with it every day.
he lives at home with me - a single Mom - who is struggling to keep things afloat financially - (401K, a small savings, equity in home, etc.)
I provide the roof over his head, food to eat and now health insurance. He has no job, no car and 2 DUIs (no license for the next 12 months). I did buy him a bike just recently and explained that a job of any sorts is better than no job and a bike is better than walking! After 5 weeks, still no effort to get out of the house on his part!
Does anyone know of a program for young adults that he might qualify for? I'm desperately seeking help for him as well as myself! I don't know how much longer I can keep this up! He's bee like this for over a year now!
We live in Alabama, but programs from anywhere would be appreciated.
wow, 33 and still living with mom. give him some tough love and kick his ass out.
give him 3 months to find a job, get everything prepared, etc. but let him know now that he has to go.
I have a 33 year old son suffering from depression, anxiety and high blood pressure. he's on medication for all three but has a dependency problem.
he's been through a 30 day rehab (detox) program for alchohol about 6 months ago and is still struggling with that and now with the medication prescribed - I'm worred and having to deal with it every day.
he lives at home with me - a single Mom - who is struggling to keep things afloat financially - (401K, a small savings, equity in home, etc.)
I provide the roof over his head, food to eat and now health insurance. He has no job, no car and 2 DUIs (no license for the next 12 months). I did buy him a bike just recently and explained that a job of any sorts is better than no job and a bike is better than walking! After 5 weeks, still no effort to get out of the house on his part!
Does anyone know of a program for young adults that he might qualify for? I'm desperately seeking help for him as well as myself! I don't know how much longer I can keep this up! He's bee like this for over a year now!
We live in Alabama, but programs from anywhere would be appreciated.
As a parent you are responsible to your grown children. You are not responsible for them.
It is your responsibility to try and get him help. To be supportive and help him to be successful. At the end of the day it is you childs responsibility to do something with what you have given them. If they choose to be on drugs then have fun doing that on the streets.
Quit taking responsibility for you 33 year old son. He is a grown man and unless he wants to change he won't. Especially when mommy seems to take care of all his needs.
I would put and end to it and send him packing if he refuses to change.
As a parent you are responsible to your grown children. You are not responsible for them.
It is your responsibility to try and get him help. To be supportive and help him to be successful. At the end of the day it is you childs responsibility to do something with what you have given them. If they choose to be on drugs then have fun doing that on the streets.
Quit taking responsibility for you 33 year old son. He is a grown man and unless he wants to change he won't. Especially when mommy seems to take care of all his needs.
I would put and end to it and send him packing if he refuses to change.
you gonna kick him out on the street and let him die there?
he is dependent on her, the thing to do is get him off of his dependecy.
those pills also affect him adversely, and he should be off of them.
It sounds like he needs a good therepist and/or life coach. It might not hurt you either, just to help give you strength. Unfortunately I know of a few adult males just like this and there is no easy way to solve the problem. All you can do is decide how much of his problem you want to make YOUR PROBLEM. You have given him a good place to hide and, even though you don't think he can make it on his own, he will have to. Co-dependancy is something you should be worried about
you gonna kick him out on the street and let him die there?
he is dependent on her, the thing to do is get him off of his dependecy.
those pills also affect him adversely, and he should be off of them.
He isn't going to die, and unless he is mentally incapicated he will figure out how to survive. That's the trap we all fall into when trying to "help" people...we soon become responsible for them.
He isn't going to die, and unless he is mentally incapicated he will figure out how to survive. That's the trap we all fall into when trying to "help" people...we soon become responsible for them.
sounds like he cant live without her.
so yes he could die if he was just kicked aside without her.
Tere53, have you tried going to a group for co dependants? He is 33 years old and you are allowing his problems to become your problems. As long as you are willing to care for him, he has no reason to get well.
Please remember this, you can't make become sober, but you can choose how you react, when he makes no attempt to help himself live a clean and sober life.
You need to find him a place to get off the drugs and alcohol. I have a stepson who is the same age with the same problems, his mother always bails him out.
He is bipolar and has so many problems it is sad.
Get help for you.. You can not make him do anything he has to want to do it for himself.
so yes he could die if he was just kicked aside without her.
That's exactly what he needs to believe.
Sometimes, impending death is the only (best?) motivator.
As someone who kicked his own brother out of his house when would not keep a job, I know how hard it is, and I also know it works. When faced with actually living on the street, my brother cleaned up his act and got serious about his life.
He's got a wife and home and education and career now. Sometimes the best thing you can do for the ones you love is let life kick them around.
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