Friendzone: How it hurts men and women

This is for "Nice Guys" and women looking for "Good Men." I'm writing this because I'm currently engaged to the girl of my dreams and have learned a few things along the way. Everything I've read on this topic is either misguided by bias, pain, anger, and most of all a lack of empathy. So I would like to share what I've learned without misguiding or bashing people.

First part is for men second is for women.

[B][U]Guys:[/U][/B]
I was a "Nice Guy" growing up so as you can imagine I was friend zoned quite a bit, it ended up turning me into a bitter and hateful person. One day though I found myself giving up on love, turning myself into the jerk we all despise and envy (Don't deny it, we do!). Along with that I also improved my body and my game helping me pull women left and right. Being the jerk works, anyone who tells you otherwise is kidding themselves. But it won't make you [B][U]HAPPY[/U][/B]! If it does you really are not a "nice guy." The women you pull will be just as callous and self-centered as you are. These women will not love you. They cry not because of heartbreak, but because of ego. That's why I stopped that foolish and fake act of being a jerk and instead became a "[B][U]GOOD MAN!"[/U][/B] Women want men who are nice, but not a pushover. Also it helps a lot if you take care of your body and add some excitement to your life. It's easy to do this. Just continue being kind towards women, but stop idolizing them girl. [B][U]Stop[/U][/B] with all the gifts, special treatment, and favors until you're in a relationship. Save this for a real relationship so these things actually are [B][U]special[/U][/B]. Instead [B][U]start[/U][/B] being more honest right off the bat with any feelings you have, and if the develop later on tell the girl when you feel like it. If she accepts great, if not move on. If you're rejected just politely leave and never look back. If you stay then you need to understand that you're agreeing to a friendship and that comes with favors, listening to love life problems, and all the things that hurt. She may decide not to date you, but you decide if you can be friend or not. Also don't change yourself to be with a woman, if you have to do that then she's not in love with the real you.

[B][U]Girls:[/U][/B]
"Being nice does not entitle you to my feelings" yes true but the same goes for "[B][U]Being nice does not entitle you to my friendship[/U][/B]." I did not go after girls who were "out of my league" I was always honest about myself. I[B][U] never[/U][/B] went for the cheerleaders in school, I went for the "[B][U]nice girls[/U][/B]." The were the nerdy girls many of them were overweight, socially awkward, and I did not even find them remotely attractive. But I was still either rejected or friend zoned. Just like the Cheerleaders they wanted models instead of giving other guys a chance. I'm a very diverse person so I'm not saying all women are the same, but everywhere I've gone I've that many girls think like this. It's great to have standards, but when someone ([B][U]guy or girl[/U][/B]) is average or below [B][U]ONLY [/U][/B]gives chances to people who make up 1% of the population it starts getting ridiculous. Anyways after a while this makes men jealous and bitter! We are not loved! Still don't understand? Don't worry you'll find out one day, but more of that in a minute. As for the friend zone, do you really expect a guy to hang around? Would you stick around if you had to watch the person you love date other people. Doubt it. This doesn't make these guys jerks, they are just protecting their already broken hearts. Ladies, a "nice guy" is [B][U]still[/U][/B] nice if they get upset or bitter at rejection. It's called having feelings, the ones we always hear people asking us to show. [B][U] This is why they become bitter, because they don't receive any love and are put down at every corner.[/U][/B] If you still disagree, start asking men out and see for yourself how rejection feels.

You have every right to choose who you date, but every choice has a consequence. If you want a man who is ripped, has a nice car, and high social status then more power to you! I understand you might find nice guys boring and unattractive, some of them might just be. But be honest when you tell people what you're looking for, it saves a lot of heartbreak in the end. Men see how you act and will ultimately change themselves to be with you. This is why older woman ask "[B][U]Where have all the good men gone?"[/U][/B] Answer is they changed themselves to impress you. and now are interested in younger women. Funny how older men start too look for the same qualities women used to when they were younger. These men have unreasonably high standards on how a woman looks, because [B][U]they can![/U][/B] They have the power now because many younger women want older men, and not many younger men want older women. How can you expect them not to? It's all these men have seen from women for [B][U]all of their lives.[/U][/B] Men don't want to be the last option, and we don't want to marry a woman who has slept with a lot of other men! That's the honest truth, it's cold but [B][U]VERY[/U][/B] honest. It's like special treatment, if a man treats you special it's amazing! But if he also does that for every other woman it kind of loses it's significance.

[B][U] Remember at the end of the day you reap what you sow![/U][/B]