Commencement

Congrats to me! I've officially graduated from Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary with an M.A. in Pastoral Counseling. I am one step closer to my ultimate goal of my doctorate in PACO with the focus on military counseling! How exciting is this??? I'm tired, but excited to begin the next step of the journey.

Yet I also wonder, am I really ready for this? Am I capable of doing everything that needs to be done to fulfill the requirements of a PhD? I'm not talking about the academics, because when I put my mind to it I can read and write. It is the emotional toll that I'm more worried about. I'm focusing on a subject that hits very close to home- PTSD. Have I dealt with my personal demons enough to be a source of help to others? As a counselor I can't be battling my pain and my past as I'm trying to help others in the same fight.

I feel like this is the path that God wants me to take. Yes, I probably would have made a great elementary teacher, and that is what a lot of my friends and family thought I should do, and it is what my undergrad degree is in. Life takes many turns, and none of them surprise God. His overall plan still remains in tact, and I feel like God wants me to use the evil that I have experienced to help others, and I yearn to do the Lord's will.

I also yearn to be a good, caring friend to all those that I meet. Sometimes I'm good at this, and sometimes I'm not. I'd like to blame it on the fact that I don't sleep much, but that is just an excuse and I hate excuses. So, this summer I'm making it a goal to be a better friend, sister, daughter. I need to be the kind of friend that I look for in other people.

Also this summer I'll be working on classes. There is no time like the present to begin the next part of my academic journey and get this party started! The sooner I start the sooner I can finish and be out there, hopefully spreading the love of Christ as I help people overcome the trauma they have experienced.

I'm living proof that while life does not go back to the way it was pre-trauma, it can still be great. I have my problems, but I also have a source of joy that wasn't there before and wouldn't be there if it wasn't for what I experienced. As I have often said- the pain teaches us to relish and cherish the good times. I also know that My Redeemer lives and that He loves me and is always there for me, but I have to be willing to take His hand. He doesn't force anything on us, he offers and we have to accept.

So while I do worry and continue to work on things with a counselor, I am convinced that I'm on the path the Lord has for me, and that in His time I'll be ready and equipped.