hunterseat df: Hunter Seat Equitation is a division that is judged on the ability and the style of the rider. The riders can be judged both over fences and on the flat.
Although true, hunters DO eat, at least the skilled ones do, my name derives from the world of horses.
And because the word hunter is in my name, people automatically think I'm a guy. Not even close.
Whenever I meet someone named Hunter I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying "That's my name, too!"
Although true, hunters DO eat, at least the skilled ones do, my name derives from the world of horses.
And because the word hunter is in my name, people automatically think I'm a guy. Not even close.
Whenever I meet someone named Hunter I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying "That's my name, too!"
I've got to go
Posted 04-22-2015 at 04:06 PM by hunterseat
I have two topics I want to talk about. One is death. The other one is the potty, specifically number one. Which one of these appeals to you? It’s a bit awkward, talking about either BUT it has to be said. I’ve thought about it so long, there’s no way around it. So I thought you could help me decide. If you’d like to hear about death, hit your number 1 key. If you’d like to hear about number one, hit your number 2 key. Take your time. I’ve got all day. *checks watch* There’s no other choice and you seem to be reluctant to select a topic so I’ll select it for you. My choice of topic is the potty, specifically number one. My reason for this is because I, being a tea drinker, had a large café latte and I’m working on my second beer. (So sue me for being stressed out!) I must warn you. I shall not utilize any off-color terminology, not even remotely amber! Lol. Did you see that? Off-color? Amber? 
HEY did you ever read the book, The Yellow Stream by I.P.Freely? Crazy what the human mind retains. If the human bladder could retain a fraction of that amount, there would be no more accidents.
Okay, so the local radio station stole my idea and asked about having-to-go experiences and people were calling in about not making it to the loo in time and it struck me as a rather crude topic of discussion. So I thought I’d participate, if only in my mind. First let’s think about flowing waterfalls of sparkling, bubbling, tinkling H2O. And the sound of rain. Any of that make you have to go?
I walked into an amazing artsy store at Nags Head, North Carolina a few weeks ago. I was browsing with delight when someone opened the door to the back garden where there was a fountain. The moment I heard the sound of running water I was like “Where’s the restroom?” I’m not sure if it’s the result of 29 years of having to fill a bottle for Uncle Sam in the military – for drug testing. They say you can put a bucket under a racehorse and he will automatically fill the bucket – for drug testing. Ever heard someone say “I’ve got to go like a racehorse!” There’s another saying “What’s the difference between Budweiser and P--? Oh, about 15 minutes!” That always got a laugh with the drunks. Anyway, the sound of running water sets something into automatic for me and I best be moving closer to the facilities.
One New Year’s Day I made the bright decision to go visit the three horses I’d agreed to adopt. What’s wrong with this picture? Going to see them AFTER agreeing to adopt them seems like putting the horse after the cart…because the cart before the horse just doesn’t really make sense in this example. Sorry, back on topic. Really. Sorry.
I drove from Memphis to Wisconsin, nearly making it in one shot until the ice storm struck so I got a room. It was actually the day after New Year’s Day. I guess that might make it New Year’s Day-after. I spent the day there and headed home that afternoon. I seriously drove too long. I don’t know if any of you have been so sleep deprived driving that you hallucinate but that does happen. I drank a lot of coffee, too. They say caffeine is a diuretic. It pulls water out of your body. And I ain’t talkin’ sweat! There’s only one thing that makes me go more than coffee. That’s being fatigued. So I wasn’t even making it from exit to exit. I seriously don’t know where all that liquid came from. It was night. I was hallucinating, scaring the stuffing out of me. AND I was having to pull off onto the side of the (mostly) deserted interstate to prevent embarrassing accidents. About the time I had a near disaster and ended up with wet sneakers, I decided to catch a few Z’s at the truck stop parking lot. After I used their facilities. Waking up to use them again. And using them one more time before driving the remaining 5 miles to my house. Okay it was more like 50 miles but I was SO CLOSE!
As my little dog tries to climb onto my lap, which is occupied by my laptop – computer, I figure I’d give her a piece of this little blog entry. Some dogs just piddle. They don’t mean to. It’s not because they can’t wait till they go outside. It’s just a reaction to certain stimulus such as yelling. Or happiness. It’s a personality trait. Scolding is useless. My little dog has that problem. Thus the frequently yelled phrase “Pet her on the linoleum!” Once I handed her to someone she was so happy to see. I knew it was going to happen. He tried to back away. It was a teenage friend of my son’s. He had to go home and change. That was pretty mean of me. It was like testing a secret weapon. If I had daughters I could hand the little piddle puppy to their boyfriends to run them off if I didn’t like them.
Anywho, I’m glad I got a chance to get all this off my chest. I think having a café latte and drinking a beer made me think about it. I don’t have too much else to say about it so CHEERS! Another beer and, in about 15 minutes… the title of this entry!
HEY did you ever read the book, The Yellow Stream by I.P.Freely? Crazy what the human mind retains. If the human bladder could retain a fraction of that amount, there would be no more accidents. Okay, so the local radio station stole my idea and asked about having-to-go experiences and people were calling in about not making it to the loo in time and it struck me as a rather crude topic of discussion. So I thought I’d participate, if only in my mind. First let’s think about flowing waterfalls of sparkling, bubbling, tinkling H2O. And the sound of rain. Any of that make you have to go?
I walked into an amazing artsy store at Nags Head, North Carolina a few weeks ago. I was browsing with delight when someone opened the door to the back garden where there was a fountain. The moment I heard the sound of running water I was like “Where’s the restroom?” I’m not sure if it’s the result of 29 years of having to fill a bottle for Uncle Sam in the military – for drug testing. They say you can put a bucket under a racehorse and he will automatically fill the bucket – for drug testing. Ever heard someone say “I’ve got to go like a racehorse!” There’s another saying “What’s the difference between Budweiser and P--? Oh, about 15 minutes!” That always got a laugh with the drunks. Anyway, the sound of running water sets something into automatic for me and I best be moving closer to the facilities.
One New Year’s Day I made the bright decision to go visit the three horses I’d agreed to adopt. What’s wrong with this picture? Going to see them AFTER agreeing to adopt them seems like putting the horse after the cart…because the cart before the horse just doesn’t really make sense in this example. Sorry, back on topic. Really. Sorry.
I drove from Memphis to Wisconsin, nearly making it in one shot until the ice storm struck so I got a room. It was actually the day after New Year’s Day. I guess that might make it New Year’s Day-after. I spent the day there and headed home that afternoon. I seriously drove too long. I don’t know if any of you have been so sleep deprived driving that you hallucinate but that does happen. I drank a lot of coffee, too. They say caffeine is a diuretic. It pulls water out of your body. And I ain’t talkin’ sweat! There’s only one thing that makes me go more than coffee. That’s being fatigued. So I wasn’t even making it from exit to exit. I seriously don’t know where all that liquid came from. It was night. I was hallucinating, scaring the stuffing out of me. AND I was having to pull off onto the side of the (mostly) deserted interstate to prevent embarrassing accidents. About the time I had a near disaster and ended up with wet sneakers, I decided to catch a few Z’s at the truck stop parking lot. After I used their facilities. Waking up to use them again. And using them one more time before driving the remaining 5 miles to my house. Okay it was more like 50 miles but I was SO CLOSE!
As my little dog tries to climb onto my lap, which is occupied by my laptop – computer, I figure I’d give her a piece of this little blog entry. Some dogs just piddle. They don’t mean to. It’s not because they can’t wait till they go outside. It’s just a reaction to certain stimulus such as yelling. Or happiness. It’s a personality trait. Scolding is useless. My little dog has that problem. Thus the frequently yelled phrase “Pet her on the linoleum!” Once I handed her to someone she was so happy to see. I knew it was going to happen. He tried to back away. It was a teenage friend of my son’s. He had to go home and change. That was pretty mean of me. It was like testing a secret weapon. If I had daughters I could hand the little piddle puppy to their boyfriends to run them off if I didn’t like them.
Anywho, I’m glad I got a chance to get all this off my chest. I think having a café latte and drinking a beer made me think about it. I don’t have too much else to say about it so CHEERS! Another beer and, in about 15 minutes… the title of this entry!
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