hunterseat df: Hunter Seat Equitation is a division that is judged on the ability and the style of the rider. The riders can be judged both over fences and on the flat.
Although true, hunters DO eat, at least the skilled ones do, my name derives from the world of horses.
And because the word hunter is in my name, people automatically think I'm a guy. Not even close.
Whenever I meet someone named Hunter I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying "That's my name, too!"
Although true, hunters DO eat, at least the skilled ones do, my name derives from the world of horses.
And because the word hunter is in my name, people automatically think I'm a guy. Not even close.
Whenever I meet someone named Hunter I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying "That's my name, too!"
The one that got away, but not fast enough..
Posted 07-09-2014 at 02:43 PM by hunterseat
...well, it was a turtle, after all. Yes. A very large snapping turtle. How large? Hold your arms out like you're hugging your mama around the waist. Your hands need to touch so, maybe not your mama. 
Did I just sneak in a mama joke?
The thing was roaming the neighborhood like a kid who got off at the wrong bus stop. I called the boss who is not quite all there to see if he wanted a snapping turtle. He was very excited and I figured this would be good for my career. I loaded the snapper into a wooden box with not a whole lot of room, but he could sit there anyway. I put a board on top with a cinder block. All I had to do was wait till morning.
The sun wasn't completely up when I loaded the box into the back of my Ford Escort hatchback. In a moment of sheer idiocy I decided I wouldn't need a top since the box was in the back of the car.
I started off on my 30 mile drive. The sun was dawning and I turned onto the interstate. I glanced into my rear view mirror, then did a double-take. A turtle head was peeking at me over the back of the rear seat.
"Get back! Shoo!" As if a turtle would obey me like a dog... actually he did obey me like my dog. That is to say NOT AT ALL.
The Jaws music played in my head. I watched in horror as the murderous beast clumsily scrabbled at the seat with it's front feet for purchase. I squeeked in fright as it caught hold and slid it's thorny carcass into the back seat.
It was a small car!
I knew I was next. I pictured reaching down to unbuckle my seat belt and coming back with a bloody nub.
So with the sun barely risen and me on the interstate, I pulled over to the side and jumped out. That thing gave me the heebie jeebies! But I still had all my fingers! And I used old mister pointer when I opened the door and demanded "OUT". Okay, wrong side so I went to the other side, flung open the door and demanded "OUT" pointing for emphasis.
I'm pretty sure that's all the turtle really wanted to do anyway. It slid out of my car on the freeway side. It went around the car, into the grass and, the last I saw, it was headed in the direction of a small body of water.
My knees were like jelly and my hands were shaking when I climbed back into the car. It occurred to me I must have been a sight for passing motorists. But I made it to work.
"Sorry about your turtle," I had to face the music.
"WHAT? I bought the crab boil and everything. Turtle's some good eating!" said my disappointed boss. I told him how big the turtle was and he told me how old the turtle probably was.
Wow. He's lived a long time.
I was really glad that one got away. (without biting me)
Did I just sneak in a mama joke? The thing was roaming the neighborhood like a kid who got off at the wrong bus stop. I called the boss who is not quite all there to see if he wanted a snapping turtle. He was very excited and I figured this would be good for my career. I loaded the snapper into a wooden box with not a whole lot of room, but he could sit there anyway. I put a board on top with a cinder block. All I had to do was wait till morning.
The sun wasn't completely up when I loaded the box into the back of my Ford Escort hatchback. In a moment of sheer idiocy I decided I wouldn't need a top since the box was in the back of the car.
I started off on my 30 mile drive. The sun was dawning and I turned onto the interstate. I glanced into my rear view mirror, then did a double-take. A turtle head was peeking at me over the back of the rear seat.
"Get back! Shoo!" As if a turtle would obey me like a dog... actually he did obey me like my dog. That is to say NOT AT ALL.
The Jaws music played in my head. I watched in horror as the murderous beast clumsily scrabbled at the seat with it's front feet for purchase. I squeeked in fright as it caught hold and slid it's thorny carcass into the back seat.
It was a small car! I knew I was next. I pictured reaching down to unbuckle my seat belt and coming back with a bloody nub.
So with the sun barely risen and me on the interstate, I pulled over to the side and jumped out. That thing gave me the heebie jeebies! But I still had all my fingers! And I used old mister pointer when I opened the door and demanded "OUT". Okay, wrong side so I went to the other side, flung open the door and demanded "OUT" pointing for emphasis.
I'm pretty sure that's all the turtle really wanted to do anyway. It slid out of my car on the freeway side. It went around the car, into the grass and, the last I saw, it was headed in the direction of a small body of water.
My knees were like jelly and my hands were shaking when I climbed back into the car. It occurred to me I must have been a sight for passing motorists. But I made it to work.
"Sorry about your turtle," I had to face the music.
"WHAT? I bought the crab boil and everything. Turtle's some good eating!" said my disappointed boss. I told him how big the turtle was and he told me how old the turtle probably was.
Wow. He's lived a long time. I was really glad that one got away. (without biting me)
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