The Rain

As I lay here in bed I can hear the rain fall heavily on my window. It feels like I am in a dream. In my mind I wonder if I am awake or asleep and realize that I am neither, but a little of both.

I am in that place between awake and asleep. My hands are warm as they roll across my chest which is very cool to the touch and my senses waken.

Touch. Sound. Sight. I open my eyes and wonder what time it is looking to the ceiling. At his house that is where the time is, but not here. I am alone in my bed and the rain is falling. Such a romantic sound, and so wishing he were here with me now, or I was there.

There will be no snuggling or cuddling on this morning, but with my bear, Mr. Teddy, but does he compare? No. Not in the slightest.

It's my birthday today and I am 38 now, but it doesn't feel any different. I listen to music playing in the background...."..baby this...could be our last first kiss...."

I remember our first kiss and a huge smile crosses my face. I am laying across my bed on my stomach and my long hair falls across my bare back, almost the feeling of his hands running across, barely touching me, like it were a tickle.

Right now I feel very alive. Though it is very early in the morning I feel very awake, even though just a few short moments ago I was in that place where I did not know the difference between awake and asleep. As strange as it may seem, I sort of like that place. Even though it is a place of limbo, in that place, there seem to be no worries or cares. No questions, all answers.

But now I am awake. Today feels so much different than yesterday. When I woke yesterday I was in a place of uncertainty but today, a place of assurance.

Though the rain falls, I feel it is going to be....a good day.