collected conversations

Part IX of Palins in the kitchen: Bristol does Diapers!

Bristol: <on the phone> yea, yea ... I know!!! They wanted my mom's underwear! Good thing they don't know about mine ... yikes!
Sarah: Bristol, hun!!! We need to get to mom training
Bristol: Levi? Oh, he's out hunting, or at least that's the codeword we have
Sarah: Off the phone young lady!
Bristol: ugh ... I gotta go do some baby stuff or something, text you?
Sarah: Bristol! it's time you start learning about babies
Bristol: duh, mom, I KNOW about babies ... what do you think is cookin' in here?
Sarah: No, hun ... after that baby comes out, you need to know how to do some stuff.
Bristol: Wait .. you aren't taking care of it?
Sarah: No hun, this is your and Levi's baby.
Bristol: But MOM!!!!! I'm still a teenager! I have stuff to do!!!
Sarah: Do you know what this is?
Bristol: Looks like a big blue teardrop ... cool! It makes a sucking noise!
Sarah: Bristol, it's an aspirator ... you will need to sometimes suck the mucus out of the baby's nose.
Bristol: Oh no you didn't .... stick it where?
Sarah: movin' along .... diapers
Bristol: What about 'em?
Sarah: Change this baby doll's diaper
Bristol: NO!!! Mom!!!!! I did my part on the campaign trail ... you lost and now you have time!
Sarah: Bristol, hun, babies are big responsibility
Bristol: well duh mom ... <rolls eyes>
Sarah: do the tabs go in front or back?
Bristol: Oh mom ... cans don't have tabs anymore ... shaaaaaaaaa!!!
Sarah: diaper tabs
Bristol: Diapers have tabs????
Sarah: Oh mercy me ... I guess I'll put this breast pump away ... we aren't ready.